MIA
I can’t believe how hard I’m shaking. I think I’m going to be sick.
“Answer it,” Zeke urges me in a strangled voice. “He’ll be worried if you don’t.”
Right, but what happens when I answer, and he starts screaming at me? Don’t be stupid. He won’t do that. He
doesn’t know what you’ve been doing. No, maybe not, but why does it feel like he does? If he wanted me to spend the rest of my life feeling like he’s watching, directly over my shoulder, he succeeded. It’s actually kind of sick in a way.
“Mia.” The way Zeke barks my name snaps me out of it. Right. I have to get it together.
“Hi, Daddy,” I chirp on answering. A look at Zeke tells me I did a good job. I don’t sound suspicious at all.
“Hello, sweetheart. You sound happy.” Sure, I was getting felt up by the bodyguard you sent to watch over me. Yeah, that would go over really well. I should definitely start with that.
“No reason not to be.” I pull on a jacket and step outside. The chill in the air feels good against my flushed skin. The heat in my cheeks starts to cool off. “How are you?”
“About as well as can be.” So why is there a hint of regret in his voice?
“Are you taking care of yourself? You’re not throwing allnight parties now that I’m not around, right?”
That gets him to laugh. “Not lately. Actually, sweetheart,
I was more concerned with disappointing you.”
For one heart-stopping second, I think, this is it. He’s going to tell me Zeke won’t be my bodyguard anymore. He’ll give me one reason or another, some bullshit excuse like wanting to move him to a different job or needing him closer to home. Something like that. And when he does, I won’t have any room to argue. I could say something about him making me feel safe, maybe, and about how long it took us to fall into a comfortable groove here. How I wouldn’t want to go through that again, especially when I should be paying attention to schoolwork.
“What’s up?” I ask when I realize I haven’t responded. I need to shape up quick, or else he’s going to ask if I’ve been doing drugs or something like that. He’s always so suspicious.
But no, he’s too busy being concerned about what he’s about to tell me. “I’m sure you’ve been looking forward to coming home for Thanksgiving break. I know I’ve been looking forward to having you here. But it’s looking like we won’t be able to make that happen.”
Well, talk about coming out of left field. “Oh. Okay.” I
lean on the railing, a little stunned.
“I’m sorry.”
“No, I understand,” I lie. Where is this coming from? “I’m sure I can stay here that week.”
“Of course. It’s not like you’re living in a dorm. They’re not going to shut down.”
“Right, sure.” Now I’m just saying words without really hearing them. “Is everything okay, though? Are you all right? You’re not sick or anything, are you?”
He gives me one of those indulgent chuckles that sets my teeth on edge. If we were face-to-face right now, he would pat me on the head. “You are so sweet to be concerned.”
“Well, I mean, it’s kind of a big holiday. I figure there has to be a reason.”
“And there is, but it’s nothing like that.”
“I’m glad to hear it.” I pause, waiting to see if he’ll explain. He doesn’t. “So what’s going on? Some big surprise you have planned for me?”
I didn’t expect him to laugh, not the way he does. Like he’s been found out. “How did you know?”
I stand straight, looking back over my shoulder into the living room. Zeke’s in there, pacing with his arms folded. Our eyes meet, and I shrug. Is there something he knows that I don’t?
Dad barrels over any questions I’m about to ask. “To tell you the truth, it has something to do with business. I’ll be traveling and making arrangements for a deal.”
Oh. That. Why did he think I would care about that? “I see.” I should’ve known.
“We’ll talk all about it when you’re home for winter break. It’s only another few weeks after that.”
As if I don’t know exactly when winter break comes up. As if I’m not practically counting the minutes. Some people sort of dread going home for break because it means giving up the freedom they’ve gotten used to while living at college. For me, it’s the opposite. I won’t have to get up for class, which means I’ll be able to sleep in as long as I want. Dad would never bother me unless I needed to make an appearance at a function where he wanted to make a good impression. I hate that kind of thing, but at least I’d be able to get dressed up.
“Yeah,” I assure him. “I’m looking forward to it.”
“That’s good to hear. I know I’m looking forward to it, too. It will be good having you home again.” Sure, although we haven’t been living together all that long. Sometimes, I wonder if he really feels about me the way he says he does.
How can he? We still don’t know each other all that well. Even after all this time, it’s not like we have a warm, tender relationship. I guess I need to take his word for it and let it go.
It’s just that I still remember so clearly how it felt to be really, truly loved by a parent. No, Mom didn’t exactly have time to hang around with me all day. We didn’t go shopping together unless it was for necessities. We didn’t get our nails done or have spa days.
But the time we did spend together was ours. She focused on me. Even if we were sitting and watching a movie together, we were together. She wasn’t on the phone, distracted. And when she asked questions about me, about my day, she listened to the answers. She asked because she wanted to know, not because she felt it was right.
She wasn’t acting. That’s it. It always feels like he’s acting.
“I hope you’re not too disappointed, though. I’ll touch base with Zeke and make sure you have everything you need for any kind of dinner you want to have on Thanksgiving. I’m sure there has to be a restaurant around somewhere you could go to, or that might cater.”
Zeke. Right. We’d be able to spend all this time together… All of a sudden, this is looking a lot better. “I haven’t had a chance to cook a nice meal in a long time.
Maybe I could give that a shot.”
“That’s an excellent idea!” He agrees with a lot more enthusiasm than I would have expected. “Sure, make whatever kind of meal you want. The sky’s the limit.”
“I will. And don’t worry about it.” I look over my shoulder again to find Zeke staring at me, his eyes full of questions. “I think we’re going to be just fine.”
I mean, I should thank him. He just gave me an excuse to spend almost a solid week with nothing to do but hang around here naked if I feel like it while Zeke does the same.
Oh, gee, no. I’m giggling to myself by the time I go back inside.
“Well? What happened?” Zeke’s eyes dart over my face.
“You’re not crying, so I guess that’s a good sign.”
“Everything is fine.”
“What happened, though? Why did he call?” It’s almost cute how anxious he is. I used to look down on him for his devotion-I cringe now, thinking back on it, but I can’t deny how angry it made me, feeling like even he wasn’t on my side. Now I know better.
Now I know his ass is in a sling even more than mine is. I don’t want Dad to be angry with me, but it’s not like I could lose my job over it the way Zeke would-at the very least. He always makes it seem like that would be the least of his problems.
“He said I shouldn’t come home for Thanksgiving.”
His eyebrows knit together instantly. “What? Why?”
“Something to do with business. I don’t know.” I shrug it off. “You would probably know better than I would, honestly. You know more about his business than I do.”
“Not anymore. And even then, I wasn’t exactly his righthand man.” He rubs the back of his neck, the other hand on his hip, staring at the floor. Deep in thought. “He’s always got business. Why would that stop you from coming home?”
“Honestly? I don’t even care.”
“You don’t? I figured you would look forward to having time off.”
“Time off from what? From school?” I can’t believe he’s being so dense. “I won’t have any schoolwork to do here, either, right?”
“That’s true…”
I walk toward him with slow, even steps. “And you’ll still be here. He didn’t say he needs you to come home for anything.”
“That’s also true…” He’s starting to get the message.
Finally. A sly smile begins to spread.
“So what that tells me is that we’ll have the days to ourselves. No classes. No project work. None of it. Just you and me.” By the time I finish speaking, I’m standing directly in front of him, grinning from ear to ear. “I think I can live with that.”
When he draws his bottom lip under his teeth, my pulse picks up speed. That’s what he’s capable of doing to me without laying a hand on me or even saying a word. It should be illegal to be this hot. This perfect. “I guess I can if you can. I wonder how we’ll find ways to fill the time.”
“I think we can come up with something together if we put our minds to it.” I slip a finger under the waistband of his shorts. “Now, I think we were talking about getting you in the shower before we were interrupted, weren’t we?”