APRILS POV
The kiss was electric, an explosion of heat and longing, pulling us together like magnets, but it shattered the fragile moment just as quickly.
Cassius pulled back first, his breath ragged, his hand still lingering at the back of my neck as if he wanted to pull me back to him, but his own restraint held him in place.
For a split second, there was nothing but the sound of our heartbeats in the air, racing in sync, but just as quickly, the space between us grew. His eyes, dark with something I couldn’t quite understand, flickered away from mine. The weight of his gaze felt like it was pressing down on me, suffocating the air between us.
I didn’t move. I didn’t say anything. But I could feel his reluctance, his hesitation, like a wall that suddenly appeared between us.
His voice was low, almost rough when he spoke. “That… was a mistake.”
The words stung, sharp as a blade, cutting through the buzz of heat still crawling beneath my skin.
A mistake?
This guy just called my first kiss a mistake? Another rejection.
At this point, I have to wonder if I have the spirit of rejection.
I stared at him, but I didn’t let the hurt show. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing how deeply his words cut. I wasn’t that woman.
“You think it was a mistake?” I asked, my voice calm, but underneath it, something was simmering-an anger, a hurt, a rejection I wasn’t sure how to process.
Cassius ran a hand through his hair, his jaw tight, the muscle in his neck twitching as if he were holding back something raw. His eyes were guarded like he was already shutting me out, but I could still see the flicker of something beneath the surface. “I’m not who you think I am, April.” His gaze darkened as he stepped back, the distance between us growing, the space becoming a chasm that I knew we couldn’t cross.
I felt the blood in my veins go cold. The air between us grew thick with unspoken tension. I wanted to say something… anything, but the words wouldn’t come. Instead, I folded my arms across my chest, trying to hide the way my body was reacting, the way his presence made my pulse race.
“I’m not like you,” he continued, voice steady but filled with something heavy. “You don’t know what lies beneath me.”
The cryptic words hung in the air, and for a moment, I wasn’t sure what he meant, but then it clicked. I think he was talking about his wolf and about him being a werewolf.
He thought I was just a human.
The thought hit me like a blow to the chest, and I couldn’t stop the way my heart twisted.
I knew what it was like to be rejected. I’d felt it once before-from the one who was supposed to be mine, the one who had abandoned me, leaving me cold and empty. The ache of that rejection and what came after still lingered in my chest, a scar I couldn’t heal, no matter how much I tried to bury it.
And now, standing here with Cassius-an Alpha, a force of nature-rejecting me in the same cold, dismissive way… it brought all of those feelings rushing back.
But I wouldn’t let it show. I wouldn’t let him see how much it hurt. I couldn’t afford to.
“Maybe I don’t need to know what’s beneath you,” I said, my voice flat, colder than I felt. “Maybe I don’t care.”
Cassius’s eyes flickered, and for a moment, I saw something-regret, maybe? But it was gone before I could fully process it. His expression hardened again, the mask slipping back into place. “You don’t understand,” he said, his voice quieter now, tinged with frustration. “I can’t let you get close. You don’t belong in my world.”
I swallowed hard, but my throat felt tight and my chest heavy. I wasn’t afraid of him. I wasn’t scared of anything. But the rejection-the second one in my life-it stung like nothing else.
“You don’t know anything about me,” I said, my voice a little more clipped and sharper. “You don’t know what I’ve been through, what I can handle.”
I hated how it seemed like I was trying to convince him to accept me or something.
He seemed to pause as if my words hit him in some way he wasn’t prepared for. But instead of saying anything more, he took a step back, and I felt that same cold distance growing between us.
“Maybe it’s better this way,” he said, his voice distant now, like the man standing before me was someone I no longer knew. “I’m dangerous, April. You don’t want to get too close.”
Dangerous.
The word echoed in my mind, and I felt the familiar, sharp pain of rejection twist deep inside me. I had been through it before-my mate’s rejection had been a wound that never fully healed. It had shaped me into the woman I am now-the woman who didn’t care or need anyone, especially not an Alpha like Cassius.
I didn’t need him to want me. I didn’t need anyone.
But as much as I told myself that, the ache in my chest remained.
Cassius didn’t wait for me to respond. He turned and walked toward the door, his back straight, his shoulders tense. I watched him go, and every step was a reminder of what I couldn’t have.
I wanted to scream, to lash out, but I didn’t. Instead, I stood there, my hands clenched into fists at my sides, my breath shallow.
The door swung closed behind him with a quiet thud, and the moment was over.
I didn’t move. Didn’t speak. Didn’t do anything except breathe.
I had been rejected twice. But this time, I was stronger. I was colder. I didn’t need Cassius. I didn’t need anyone.
I walked to the counter, wiped it down again, and let the bar’s usual noise fill the silence in my mind. The hurt, confusion, and anger were all buried beneath a wall I had built months ago.
And I wasn’t going to let anyone break through it.
Not him. Not anyone.
But why did it feel like he already had?