Aprils pov
… So far.
The worst part? I have to leave this fantastic creature behind who has grown to mean so much to me.
What should I do?
I know that there is strength in number, but I don’t want to drag him into the unknown.
I could feel the weight of the decision pressing down on me, suffocating me with each breath I took. I had to go. It was the only thing left that made sense, the only thing that felt like it might stop the crushing ache in my chest. There was no easy way out of this-no neat bow to tie around the mess I’d made of my life. But there he was, sitting next to me, his presence both a comfort and a complication.
“April, for Goddess’s sake, Stop thinking so hard. You are hurting my brain,” Dylan says.
Wait, he can hear me thinking?
“H-” I begin, but I’m quickly cut off.
“Our wolves have formed a bond, not the one you’re thinking of-they have formed the sibling bond. My wolf can’t shut up about his adorable little sister, who happens to be your wolf. ” He pauses. Other than that, are you okay?”
“Wow, that is such a twist. Yes, I am better, but I’ll never be okay… thanks for last night.” I say.
“What are big brothers for?” he asks and hugs me. “I’m glad you’re better. What are you going to do now?” He continues, and I remain silent, not wanting to say what I have to do.
“I have to go,” I finally whispered, barely audible, but it felt like I’d screamed the words out loud.
His face didn’t change immediately, but the way his jaw tightened and his eyes softened told me everything I needed to know. He wasn’t surprised. He’d probably seen this coming for a while. I couldn’t stay forever. I knew that. I had to find them. My real parents. I had to figure out who I was beyond the broken pieces I’d been given, even if it meant leaving the one person who understood me most. But leaving him felt like tearing a part of myself away.
“No,” Dylan’s voice was low and quiet as if he were speaking a truth he didn’t want to believe. You don’t have to go, little sister. Please don’t go.”
I looked at him, trying to find the words that would make sense of it all, but all I could see was his face-torn, desperate, like he couldn’t understand why I was choosing this.
“I have to,” I said, my voice breaking. “I have to find them, Dylan. I don’t know who I am without knowing who they are.”
His hand found mine, warm and steady, and I felt a jolt of emotion rush through me at the simple touch. “I don’t care about that,” he said, his voice a mix of frustration and something more profound. “I care about you. It’s not about what you think you have to do. You’re not alone in this. I’m here. I’ve always been here.”
I pulled my hand away, fighting against the flood of emotions building inside me. “You’re not listening,” I whispered, voice shaky. “We can’t stay together. You’re everything I’ve needed, Dylan, but I can’t hold onto you while I’m still lost. I need to find them. I need to know the truth.”
He leaned in closer, desperation creeping into his voice. “I’m not going anywhere, April. You don’t have to do this alone. You’re not alone in this.”
“I’m not asking you to follow me, Dylan,” I said, trying to hold myself together. “I’m asking you to understand that I have to do this for me. So I can figure out who I am.”
Dylan’s eyes searched mine, and he looked pained. “You’re not just April anymore,” he said, his voice thick with emotion. You’re our April, my little sister. You don’t have to go on this journey by yourself.”
I shook my head, the tears starting to sting my eyes. “I don’t know if I can stay, Dylan. I don’t know if I deserve to. But I have to do this. I can’t be who I need to be if I don’t find out where I come from. And you, you’re not the one who’s supposed to help me find that. You’re supposed to be here, by my side, but not for this. I need to do this on my own.”
His hand gently cupped my cheek, urging me to look at him to see the sincerity in his eyes. “You don’t need to do this alone. You don’t need to go anywhere. You don’t have to leave me, ” he repeated, which broke my heart.
For a long moment, he was silent, just holding my gaze. I could see the struggle in his eyes-the battle between wanting to keep me close and understanding that I had to walk this road, no matter how hard it was.
“I have to; this is my journey, Dylan. I can’t drag you into this. This is really important to me,” I say fiercely. I close my eyes, the tears slipping down my cheeks. “I do need to, Dylan. I need to know who I am and where I come from. I need to find my people. I need to find my parents and understand why they never came back for me.”
After a moment of silence, he sighed, and I saw the acceptance in his expression, even though it cut through me.
“I can’t stop you,” he said, voice barely above a whisper. “I won’t stop you. But it doesn’t mean I’m not going to miss you.”
“I’ll miss you too,” I whispered, my voice breaking. “But this isn’t goodbye. I’m just… I’m not who I need to be yet.”
His hand dropped to his lap, and the silence between us felt heavier than any words we could’ve exchanged. The reality of the situation settled around us, thick and suffocating. But he didn’t pull away. He didn’t let go.
We sat there for a long while, neither of us moving, neither of us saying anything more. I could feel the ache in his chest, the space that would always remain between us, no matter how much we wanted it to be different. But I had to go. I had to find the pieces of myself I couldn’t reach without understanding where I came from.
And yet, in that silence, Dylan’s warmth wrapped around me like a blanket, a quiet promise that, no matter where I went, he would be there, waiting.
Finally, he broke the stillness with a small, shaky laugh.
“I understand, April. I wish I hadn’t, but I sadly get it. May the Moon Goddess grant you a safe journey, and I pray that we meet again. May you find everything that you’re searching for,” he says sadly.
“Heeyyy! I’m not leaving yet. So, don’t get all sad on my ass,” I say, and I hug him tight.
Dylan’s lips curled into a sad, reluctant smile. “I’m not saying goodbye yet. Just trying to prepare myself.”
“You’re impossible,” I teased, though my voice was thick with the emotions I couldn’t hide. “You are acting like I’m never coming back to you and that we will never meet again.”
“You’re not leaving forever, are you?” he asked quietly, hope laced in every word.
I shook my head, my heart aching with the unspoken bond between us. “No,” I said, voice barely a whisper. “I’m not leaving forever. I just… I have to do this. No matter how long it takes.”
“Promise me you will look for me once you get everything your heart desires,” He whispers.
“I promise, brother,” I say and kiss his cheek. I see a smile form on his face at the word “brother.”
Dylan stayed silent, his hand finding mine again. We sat there, not saying anything more, but the quiet seemed enough. The world outside could wait. Right now, all that mattered was the space between us-filled with something unspoken but real.
We stayed.
And for a moment, I let myself believe that was enough.
For now.
We stay that way for a while, and the only sound that can be heard is our hearts breaking into a million pieces at the thought of leaving each other….
____________________________________