ALESSIA
“Thank you,” I softly said to Claude.
Adrian’s surgery had been completed. He was currently resting in the private room that Claude had personally chosen. If it were up to me, I would have opted for a standard private room. But my ex-husband insisted on the most expensive suite.
There was no issue since Claude could easily afford it. What bothered me was his tendency to flaunt his wealth. It made me feel helpless about doing anything for our child. But I pushed aside those thoughts. Adrian’s recovery was more important to me.
I swallowed my pride for the sake of our son. So, even though I was angry with Claude, he was still the one I asked for help. Now we were together in one room. I sat beside Adrian’s bed, while Claude stood on the other side.
“No problem. Adrian is my son, so I should help him and not neglect him. Besides, I owe you both a lot,” Claude said.
I raised an eyebrow. “Are you trying to say you’re only helping Adrian because you owe him?”
Claude scratched his head. “Not like that, Sia. And you also have faults, you know. You didn’t tell me you were pregnant. If only I had known”
I asked him if he would still push through with divorce had I told him about my pregnancy.
Claude sighed heavily.
I already knew the answer to my question. Even if he had known about my condition back then, it wouldn’t have changed his decision to leave me. So, it was right for me to keep Adrian a secret.
“I’m sorry about that. That’s why I’m going to do everything to make it up to you. Even if you refuse, I’ll still help you both.”
I rubbed my forehead. “You paid for the surgery, that was enough. We won’t ask for any more help once Adrian is discharged. We’ll probably go home, and you don’t have to worry about us.”
I thought that Claude never needed anyone in his life, he never needed me. I could not see the point why he would have to worry about me and about my son. Like I said, I could raise my son all by myself.
Claude’s expression turned serious. It seemed he didn’t like what I said. “Sia, please don’t say that. Adrian is my son. I’m still your husband, so I have a big responsibility to both of you. Let me do my part as a father and a husband.”
I furrowed my brow. “What husband are you talking about? We’ve been divorced for a long time, Claude. You’re no longer my husband.”
Claude shook his head. “You’re wrong, Sia. You are still my wife, and I am still your husband. I never used the document you signed back then. I also didn’t proceed with the legal separation I planned. I didn’t even file for annulment. So legally, we’re still married, despite your denial.”
I am speechless. It was hard to believe Claude’s words. What could be his reason for not proceeding with our separation? Was he threatened by his own parents? That he wouldn’t inherit anything if he divorced me? Could that be why he didn’t push through with our initial plan to separate?
“Once Adrian can leave the hospital, you’ll come home with me. We’ll live together under one roof. But if you prefer, we can still live in the mansion. Mom and Dad will be thrilled to see Adrian.”
I grimaced. “I’m sorry to disappoint you but Adrian and I won’t be joining you. Even if you claim that you didn’t pursue our separation back then, our marriage means nothing to me. It’s just a piece of paper. And I can’t think of any good reason to come back to you. We’ve managed to live without you for the past five years, and we can do it again for many more years.”
I no longer wanted to be with Claude. I had experienced being with him before, and nothing good had come out of it except for Adrian. I didn’t want to revisit the past. I didn’t want to get hurt again. I was done hoping. Besides, I was not even sure about Claude’s sincerity. Maybe Adrian was his only concern, which was why he was being cordial. Perhaps once he gained our son’s sympathy, he would suddenly take him away and leave me behind.
I was so hurt that I could not have even a small amount of trust towards him. If only I could narrate to him every struggle that confronted me after I left their mansion, only then he could at least have an idea how difficult it was for me to believe in him.
“No! Don’t say that, Sia. Give me a chance to prove to you that I regret what I did. Let me be with our son. Don’t you feel sorry for him for not having his father around?” Claude appealed to my conscience.
Chance? Chance for him to make me feel bad about myself again? Chance for him to just dump me whenever he felt like it?
I sighed. “I feel sorry for Adrian. But it would be even more pitiful for him if you suddenly disappear after making him feel your presence. How painful would that be for a child who barely understands what’s happening around him? Do you understand what I’m saying?”
Claude sighed heavily. “I promise I won’t leave, Sia. I won’t leave you and Adrian. Please trust me.”
I avoided eye contact. I wanted to trust Claude. I also wanted to believe what he was saying. But I knew him from head to toe. What would happen if the time came when he also left us because he found another woman? What would happen to me and my son?
What if Claude finds a woman to love? The kind of love that I had hoped for. What about me and Adrian? Somewhat, I was feeling jealous. It was this kind of attention that he was giving our son right now that I was hoping to get from him back then.