Finally our orgasms subsided and we both collapsed onto Michele’s little bed. Our bodies were hopelessly entangled and we were both far too relaxed and sated to care. She pulled her cock out of my mouth and I did the same. We lay panting. I had saved Michele’s seed in my mouth to that point and as I wanted to taste her forever, to make sure I didn’t forget it. But I knew that this moment would not last forever. All I could do was savor it now. I swallowed it down and promptly fell asleep under the warm body of my lover.
**Freedom**
“Rose,” a man’s voice said as I was shooting off an e-mail. I waited to make sure that it went through, not turning yet, “Are you going out tonight?”
“Sorry Dan,” I said, recognizing who it was, “But they waited three months after Debra left before they finally decided to give me a promotion, they just let stuff back up. I am not getting out of here until late” I turned now and looked at the door to my new office. Boxes were still stacked up everywhere but it was nice to be out of cubicle after so many years at the company. And a promotion with a big raise didn’t hurt either.
“Yeah, I know things have been crazy,” Dan sympathized. Crazy was an understatement.
“I really wish I could,” I said and I truly meant it. Everyone from the office went out on Fridays and I always hated to miss it. At least, I’d hated to miss it for the last year. Since that incredible night at Michele’s apartment.
“And you know I normally wouldn’t bother you, especially since the promotion, but it is Andrea’s birthday, and you know how she is about everyone getting together on Fridays. We even let her pick a place near where she lives,” he explained. My ears perked up at that. I thought I remembered where Andrea lived.
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“Oh some chain bar and grill near the old Stovington Mall,” he explained. A wide grin spread across my face.”
“Hey Dan, you’re right, I need to be there for this,” I said, “Let me make a phone call and I will meet everyone there in a bit.”
“Great!” Dan said, “see you soon.” But I was already making my call.
Five minutes later I was on the road heading out towards the restaurant. I hadn’t made this drive in a while and I couldn’t believe how much had changed in the last year. It had been a little weird at first and definitely nerve-wracking. I had started to try to integrate myself back into society. I’d started at work. At first people were resistant. I had really hurt some people in my desire to protect myself. But I found strength that I hadn’t had before. I apologized to people. I let myself get hurt to show others that I was sincere. I won my way back into the real world. And the odd thing was, that while it hurt at times, in the long run it was less painful. Hell, there was no way I would’ve gotten this promotion without letting down my barriers and becoming a better person. It was like I was now a newer, better version of myself. Hence the party invite.
It was a little before six when I pulled into the parking lot of this once-familiar bar. I glanced briefly over at the pet shop. It was still there, looking as dark and dingy as ever. I smiled a little to myself, remembering the place I’d been, all those months ago when I’d first gone there. It seemed like something different from a memory, like it was a dream. I don’t know if it was a good dream or a bad one. I shook my head and then got out of my car and shuffled into the bar.
Everyone from work was already there. A couple of people turned as I walked in and said hello. I found a spot at an open table and sat down with my co-workers. They’d already ordered and someone said they’d gotten me a burger. It was a nice evening. I had long since learned that most of my co-workers were really nice people and I looked forward to going out with them. We ate together and I made light conversation with people. I milled around the restaurant, dropping into conversations, laughing at funny stories, and sharing things of my own. I had a few drinks and sang along when we wished Andrea a happy birthday. It wasn’t the best party I’d ever been to, but I was fully involved in it and it made me feel good. Whole.
Sometime a little before nine, a couple of people had already started to leave. I had an engagement as well. I stood up to leave.
“Heading out?” a woman who I supervised, Lisa, said. I looked at her and smiled.
“Yeah, I have to get to work,” I said. She stuck out her tongue but smiled back.
“We have karaoke coming up, sure you don’t want to stay?” Someone else, Andy, asked seriously. I put up my hands.
“Oh absolutely not, I can’t sing.”
“I don’t sing either,” he said, “But you have to hear Dan make an ass of himself.” I laughed, trying to picture Dan singing. I was actually tempted.
“Some other time, I promise.”
“Your loss,” Andy said but in a good-natured way.
“Have a good night,” Lisa said sincerely, “See you Monday.”
“See you Monday,” I said and started to walk towards the door. I nodded at people and waved goodbye on my way out. I stepped outside and breathed in the cool evening air. I had a smile plastered on my face that I couldn’t have dropped if I wanted to. Everything just felt so right. I looked to my side, over at the pet shop and then checked my watch. Nine o’clock.
I moved towards the pet shop, the opposite direction of my car. The lights were still on. I knew from experience that the place didn’t close until ten. I wondered for a moment if anyone from my office was leaving at the same time, if they would see me. I decided not to worry about it. I walked briskly across the blacktop and grabbed the handle on the door.
I walked inside and smelled the familiar, musty scent of the pet shop. I looked at the register and saw a college-aged boy casually reading a car magazine. He didn’t even look up as I walked in. The animals seemed equally bored. I ignored them all and quickly walked towards the bathroom.
I stepped inside and saw that everything was as I had left it the last time I was there. Three stalls, a sterile smell, and a dirty floor. I looked at myself once in the mirror. My face was brighter than it had been the last time I was here, less pinched at the eyes and more likely to smile. I stuck my tongue out and then walked toward the stalls.
This time I did something different, something I hadn’t done since my first trip to the pet shop. Instead of walking toward the side stall, I marched directly into the middle stall. I turned, shut the door and sat down on the toilet. I let out a deep breath.
Here I was at the site of my absolute lowest point in my life. I thought back to that day, when I’d run out of the bar to flee a man I was certain was dangerous, climbed into this room and hid in terror and shame. The same walking route I’d taken that night, but a million miles away in terms of mental well-being. It hardly seemed possible. I put my head in my hands, as I had that night, but I simply shook my head in my hands.
After a few moments of rumination, I leaned back against the tank of the toilet and glanced at my watch. It was five minutes after nine. I had an appointment to keep. I lifted my hand now and rapped three times in quick succession against the thin metal separator between the stalls. I paused a moment and then rapped on final time, slightly louder.