For a second, I was just totally frozen. Actually seeing my son’s… body, made me realize for the first time what I was doing. It was all well and good to think about helping Tyler when I got a wild idea and started to run with it. But here I was staring my decision in the… face, and I couldn’t believe what I was doing. I had been so excited by the idea of helping my son, I hadn’t even really thought through what I was deciding. And Tyler was right, what I was doing was wrong. This wasn’t the sort of thing a mother was supposed to do with her son. It was a sin. What was I supposed to do now?
The most moral, upstanding, churchly part of me almost convinced me at that moment to stand up and walk away from Tyler. To go put my clothes back on and knock at the door. But I looked up from my spot on my knees, I saw my son, doomed to die, looking down at me with a mixture of fear and excitement on his face. It was too late now. I’d promised too much now to just apologize and walk away. Tyler deserved better than that. I had to stop running for the messes that I made.
When I accepted that I was actually going to… do this thing, my heartrate shot up. I felt wobbly and I felt a cold sweat break out on my skin. I told myself that I would just… do this one thing real quick because I’d promised it, I’d close my eyes and pretend I was anywhere else. Then, when it was over, I’d just leave and never think about it again. But as I thought that, I felt Tyler’s hand come down and rest gently against my shoulder. His hands weren’t cold anymore, I could feel his warmth against me. Even if I hadn’t known it was him, I would have felt it my just how gentle and familiar it was.
“I love you mama,” he said softly. And It was clear he wasn’t just thanking me in advance for what I’d promised to do. There was a warmth in his voice… my boy was telling me how he really felt about me. And my heart broke again in that moment. I didn’t deserve the warmth in that voice. I didn’t deserve his love.
I couldn’t bear to look at him now. How could I promise to help him, and even consider what I was thinking? My boy was a virgin. I was going to give him all the sex he’d ever have in his entire life. And I was thinking about half-assing it, doing just enough to get by. Just like I’d done with every bit of my mothering since he was born. I’d always done the bare minimum, or what I thought was the bare minimum, to get by. And look where it had gotten me. Look where it had gotten my son. No. If I was going to do this, then for the first time goddamnit, I was going to do something right. I was going to turn off the part of my mind that was telling me to stop. For the first time in his life, I would give everything I had to Tyler. I wouldn’t hold anything back.
That thought sort of busted me out of myself. I just kinda sprang into action, I guess. My right hand reached up and seemed to find its own way to the fly on Tyler’s boxers. There wasn’t no button or anything like that, just a slit in the front of the boxers. My hands were small, and my fingers slipped easily inside. I could feel the heat of Tyler’s body and I heard him gasp as my hand brushed against his half-hard cock. I didn’t hesitate now. I fished my hand around inside of my son’s boxers, I felt the smooth, hot flesh of his cock against my palm and I wrapped my fingers around it. I pulled my hand back quickly, slipping Tyler’s penis out through the slit in his boxers.
It had been a very, very long time since I’d last seen Tyler’s penis. I could see now, even though his cock was only half-hard and flopping in my hand, that he didn’t take after his daddy. Tyler’s cock was a healthy size, very thick with lots of blue veins coursing across it. It… good looking and I felt my mouth water as I looked at it. I didn’t think about the fact that it happened, but I know now that it did.
Tyler’s body felt like the tension had ratcheted up since I’d grabbed him, I saw his legs trembling. I reached my free hand up, putting it against Tyler’s stomach and rubbing him softly. At the same time, I started to move my other hand slowly up Tyler’s shaft towards the circumcised tip of his penis. I felt the muscles rippling under my fingers, I could feel the heat of it soaking into my body. I realized I didn’t care if this was wrong or if it was a sin, it felt good to stroke my son’s cock. Tyler seemed to think it felt good as well, I could hear him groaning as I stroked him and his body eased slightly.
“Oh my god, Mama,” he said and I looked up at him. His eyes were closed and his body was swaying in time with my hand as I started to stroke a little bit faster, up and down on his shaft. I could feel Tyler’s penis growing hard and thicker in my hand. Soon it wasn’t flopping through my fingers anymore, instead sitting up high and proud on his body. I licked my lips.
“It hasn’t even started yet, baby,” I said softly. I rose up higher on my knees and moved my hand down to the bottom of Tyler’s shaft. It was very hard now and I pulled down on it. Tyler groaned as I forced the tip of his cock forward, towards my face. I was looking at my son’s penis now, right at it. It was strange to have been touching my son’s penis at all. But I guess I’d touched it before. Never like this, of course, but it wasn’t completely new. But as I looked at my son’s penis, I realized that I was about to do something I’d never done before. Something I’d never expected I would ever do. But I didn’t get cold feet again. If anything, I felt my mouth water and I felt a strange, electrical feeling inside of my chest. I realized that I really wanted to do it.
And so I didn’t hold back. I open my lips, but just a little bit, and leaned forward. I kept my eyes opened, but turned them up towards Tyler, at his pursed lips and closed eyes. I felt the slick tip of my son’s penis press against my lips as I kissed it gently. It felt like a rocket of nerves tore through my body when I recognized that I was feeling the soft, smooth skin on his most private spot. I pushed my mouth forward farther. I didn’t spread my lips, I let Tyler’s penis push through them, keeping my mouth tight around his shaft. In a moment, the entire tip slipped between my teeth and my lips caught tightly around the ridge at the bottom of his tip. My tongue moved forward in my mouth and I tasted the salty slickness of my son’s skin. I swirled my tongue around on his tip, tasting every inch of it and feeling how smooth the skin was against the bumps on my tongue. Tyler moaned loudly and I could feel the muscles in his stomach contract against my hand.