CHAPTER 103
LILY’S POV
~ I lifted my head and looked at her. “What about Liam?”
“He’s playing a video game in his room.”
I smiled, glad he was doing well. But didn’t he hear the sound of the glasses shattering? It was loud enough and could even be heard from outside the house. Since Nana Mae was coming from upstairs on hearing it, that meant he too must have heard it. Why didn’t he come rushing downstairs? Was she sure he was really upstairs in his room or was there something she wasn’t telling me? ~
“I know what you’re thinking,” Nana Mae said as if she could read my mind. “You don’t have to worry. He has earphones on. He didn’t hear anything. And I think he’ll probably take a nap when he’s done playing to rest his eyes.”
I sighed in quiet relief on hearing that. The eye doctor had mentioned that the antibiotics she prescribed would make him feel drowsy and inactive for a while, so it was important to let him rest and take time off school as needed.
I fell silent, staring into space. I was aware of Nana Mae’s gaze, probing, staring at me as if expecting me to say or do something.
“Young lady, you can’t keep me hanging. You heard me loud and clear so answer my question. Right now, I’m the only person that you can talk to concerning whatever it is you’re going through. I’m not leaving until you have answered me and I have made you feel better. Plus, you need to get yourself cleaned up before anyone sees you like this.”
She said, her eyes drifting to the part of my cream gown where the wine had spilt. Against the light fabric, the deep red stain was glaringly obvious, with splashes that extended down to my ankles and shoes, leaving me feeling even more dirty and dishevelled. But at least, I wasn’t injured by the glass pieces.
“He found me,” I sniffled in a sob and said with a lifeless expression on my face.
“Who found you?” She asked, her curiosity intensifying.
“Robert, my ex-husband,” I met her curious and concerned gaze.
She let out a sigh, not quite the reaction I was expecting. She knew who Robert was and what he’d done to me in the past. I told her all about it during that period I was getting those series of life-threatening attacks from Cassandra.
“Is that the reason you look this miserable?” She asked, seeming to take the matter lightly.
My brows drew together in bafflement. “Don’t you understand the situation at hand, Nana Mae? If he found me, that meant bad news because he’s going to want to do some very bad things to me and take my kids from me…”
“Did you see him face to face?” Her hand rested on my shoulder as she asked, trying to calm me down.
I grimaced as I couldn’t understand why she was asking that. I didn’t need to see Robert face to face to know his true intentions for me. As long as he doesn’t love me and still thinks I’m responsible for his grandpa’s murder, his intentions for me will always be evil.
Despite my hesitation, Nana Mae urged me to answer so I nodded begrudgingly.
“Did he say he’d hurt you and do some very bad things to you when you saw him?” She asked, leaving me more disoriented in shock. “Did he in any way threaten or raise any matter concerning your kids I remembered clearly you told me he didn’t know about them.”
I was speechless, scoffing in disbelief over her questions and way of thinking. I didn’t like the direction she was going with this. If this was her way of making me feel better, then I didn’t want any part of it because she was making me look dumb instead.
“He’s cruel and vindictive. He doesn’t need to say it to my face for me to…” I tried to protest but she said something that threw me off balance.
“I know a broken heart when I see it, dear,” she said. “If you’re feeling this way then there might be just a little chance you’re still in love with him. Even after all these years have gone by, I think you still feel something for him. You’re denying it and misplacing your feelings of love for him with all this rage and hatred that is eating you up from the inside like a virus.”
I couldn’t contain the shock I felt as I grimaced incredulously, mad at her words. This is no way I can still be in love with that man. I’m not so foolish as to be after everything I suffered in his hands.
When I first arrived in this city, I won’t deny I used to think of him sometimes, and about the passionate night we shared that led to me being pregnant anytime I was alone. But that was my mind and body acting up and probably trying to adjust to my new environment and life without him.
With time, I moved on. I forgot completely about him and hated him so much that I pictured myself chopping off his balls many times. He rejected my love, and my pregnancy, chose Scarlet words over mine and left me for dead. That is something I can’t forget. The pain left an indelible scar deep in my soul. Because of that, all I feel is anger whenever I remember him. I’m angry because I was a fool and let him hurt me this deeply.
“You’re wrong, Nana Mae,” I said with a hardened heart and furious expression. “I don’t love him. There is no way I can love the man who left me out on the road to be run over and crushed even if I’m suffering from Stockholm syndrome. All I feel for him is pure hatred and nothing more. If I get the opportunity to make his life a living hell, I will take it without hesitation.”
She sighed heavily and shook her head as if to disapprove of everything I said.
“Life is short,” she said with a note of wistfulness in her voice. Her hand moved to the side of my face. She cradled it and used her thumb to gently scrap away the tear lined there. “Not everyone gets a second chance to make things right. So it’s crucial you don’t do anything you’ll end up regretting for the rest of your life. Don’t let all this rage and hatred cloud your judgement and push you towards making the bad decisions.”
She gently tucked the loose strands of my hair that had fallen across my face behind my ears, smoothing them carefully before continuing. I stared at her intently in quietness, trying to figure out the direction she was heading with her small comforting gestures and the things she was saying.
“You said he was your first love right, and he took your virginity,” She asked and I nodded curiously.
“And also the father of your children,” she sighed again, this time pitifully as her lips folded back. “We women have the hardest time forgetting someone of that sort because we share an inseparable connection with them whether or not we like it. I haven’t seen him physically but I can tell something is not right with the way he treated you in the past. I can only offer you advice. I won’t force you into action. It’s your choice to do whatever you want. He’s the father of your kids. Soon or later they’ll want to know about their father. Kids are naturally curious so you can’t keep important information from them. I see what you’ve been trying to do with Noah. He’s a good man and will make a great father but he’s not their biological father. You can’t change reality.”
I was thrown off by her last words because I never expected her to say it or even notice I have been trying to use Noah to make the kids forget Robert.
“I’ll tell you hold on a bit and observe Robert because time reveals everything. If he’s truly sorry and is making frantic efforts to make up for the mistakes of the past, it’ll show and thereafter, you can decide on what to do with him. But if he’s still trying to hurt you again and take your kids from you, I want you to show him you’re not the same person he knew years back. And I’ll personally help you get your revenge on him and make his life a living hell.”