“My beloved Lillian, if you’re reading this letter, don’t be sad. Grandma will always love you, and I hope my dear one will find happiness.”
Old Mrs. Brown watched as Lillian’s delicate shoulders trembled, the letter in her hands shaking with silent sobs.
Old Mrs. Brown wiped her own tears and said, “Good girl, your grandmother told me that in her life, she had no more attachments. She had two ungrateful children, but her greatest pride was you. As her friend, I feel deeply guilty about what happened between you and Conrad.”
Old Mrs. Brown paused for a moment and then continued, “Now, I ask you, would you be willing to follow Conrad? If you are, I’ll support you. As long as you agree, I can ensure you’ll secure your place.”
So many people in the circle were waiting for Old Mrs. Brown to give her assurance.
But Lillian simply shook her head. “Grandma Brown, I don’t want to.”
Old Mrs. Brown didn’t say anything. “I can give you time to think about it. I know you probably don’t want to think about other things right now. But life moves forward. I’ve experienced things others haven’t, and I’ve enjoyed things they never will. I’ve seen a lot. If you have feelings for Conrad, think carefully.”
Conrad was upstairs, watching, unsure of what was being said. He anxiously came downstairs and walked toward them.
“Grandma, will you stay for dinner tonight? There’s nothing good to eat at the old house.”
Old Mrs. Brown scolded playfully, “No, you’d complain about me being here.” She glanced at Lillian. “Alright, take good care of Lillian. I’ll leave now.”
She didn’t waste any time, instructing someone to arrange for a car.
Lillian snapped back to reality, and Conrad frowned as he looked at her. After seeing his grandmother off, he returned and noticed Lillian still standing there, holding the file. “What’s that?”
“It’s nothing.” Lillian didn’t want to discuss her grandmother with him.
If it were the old Conrad, he would have grabbed the file from her to read it, but now he could only suppress his curiosity, knowing he would eventually find out.
As they drove past Hillside Villa, leaving it behind,
Old Mrs. Brown looked back.
“Why the sigh? Could it be that the young lady didn’t agree?”
Old Mrs. Brown smiled down, “She really didn’t agree.”
Her nanny, Joyce, was surprised. “That’s strange.”
So many women dreamed of marrying Conrad.
When they were young, they often thought about love, but after experiencing hardships, they came to realize that a comfortable life was much more reliable than any so-called romance.
“Now, things aren’t peaceful at home. The father and son keep causing trouble, and they’ve kept me in the dark about everything. If the girl’s heart is set on Conrad, that’s fine, but if she truly distances herself from him over this, and gets used by others one too many times, then it wouldn’t be suitable. Conrad needs a woman who can help him and loves him wholeheartedly.”
Old Mrs. Brown added, “Being a part of the Brown family means you need to be tough. Otherwise, with all the family business and relationships involved, how could a young girl handle it? Conrad needs a woman who is strong enough to stand by him in this position.”
******
After a few bites of food, Lillian couldn’t bring herself to eat anymore.
Conrad said, “You’ve barely eaten, want some more soup?”
Lillian lowered her eyes and replied, “I don’t want Helen to go abroad.”
Conrad, hearing her directly make a demand. “Finish your rice first.”
Lillian picked up her fork again and mechanically shoveled food into her mouth.
“Done. I don’t want Helen to go abroad.”
“Alright.”
Lillian wanted to smile sweetly at him, like she used to, to get what she wanted.
But her face remained stiff and tense, unable to let go of the barriers, unable to fully release the hurt.
Without her weakness, it seemed like all the pretense had lost its meaning.
“I’m going upstairs.” She said this and tried to stand up.
“Lillian.” He put down his fork. “I want you to take your time and sort out your feelings, but I hope that it’s only for now.”
She stopped for a moment, as if not hearing him, and then she went upstairs and closed the door.
But no matter how much she locked the door, he would always find a way to get the key, reminding her to go back to her room to rest.
“It’s only 10 o’clock. I still want to do some work.”
“Lillian, the truth is that when you went upstairs, that computer page didn’t move at all.”
Lillian knew about Conrad’s obsessive control, but she had never considered that her computer was under his surveillance.
She leaned back in her chair. “Conrad, am I not allowed any personal freedom? If I change to a few different computers, will you monitor all of them?”
“If you listened to me, I wouldn’t need to do this.” He didn’t want to, but he really wanted to know what she was doing, what she was thinking.
After watching her for three hours, all he saw was the page paused on her thesis and a part-time video.
Not a single movement.
And it was already time to sleep.
She hadn’t had a proper night’s sleep in a long time, and every day she just closed her eyes, but deep sleep was almost non-existent.
How long could a person keep going like this?
In the past, Conrad would just leave without asking her.
Now, Lillian actually kind of missed the old Conrad, the one who didn’t care about her at all.
“I’ll go back soon.”
Conrad didn’t say anything, just kept staring at her.
After a while, Lillian reluctantly closed her computer.
She was physically and emotionally exhausted, and she didn’t want to keep having pointless arguments with him.
As soon as she entered the room and saw the custom-made double bed, it felt like a heavy weight had dropped on her chest, making it hard to breathe.
Conrad had finished his shower. Lillian grabbed her clothes and went in.
Half an hour later, Conrad glanced at his watch, walked to the bathroom door, and knocked. “Lillian, what are you doing in there?”
No response.
Instinctively, Conrad pushed the door open.
“Lillian! What are you doing?!”
She was startled awake, as if her soul had returned to her body. Only when he saw her awake did his heart finally settle.
With a serious face, he grabbed the towel and pulled her up, wiping the water off her body.
When they used to shower together, he had done this before.
But now, just being touched by him made Lillian feel completely uncomfortable.
Finally, unable to hold back anymore, she said, “I’ll do it myself.”
“You’ll do it yourself? You fell asleep while showering, do you even have a soul left in your body?”
Lillian looked at him, realizing the tone of her voice.
Conrad held back and said, “I’ll get you dried off right away.”
It was the first time he had seen Lillian without clothes, and he had no erotic thoughts.
He helped her put on the nightgown, even making sure to put on her underwear for her before lifting her and placing her gently on the bed.
Once on the bed, his breath overwhelmed her, and she instinctively closed her eyes, her body tensing up in resistance.
It was a complete rejection.
If Conrad truly wanted to do something to her, she wouldn’t be able to resist at all.
However, he simply held her and gently patted her shoulder. “Go to sleep.”
It was as if he was clumsily trying to learn how to comfort a woman, using every method he could to be a Conrad who had never acted this way before.
All Lillian knew was that half of her soul was floating in the air, and the other half was submerged in the sea.
In half a month, graduation would be here.
She told herself to fight the impulse to push him away.
Once that time came, everything would be over, and she would have a fresh start.