Traumatized would be a small word to describe what I felt the night he did something to me that was out of my imagination and my wildest dream.
I was scared to death that he would actually take me against my wishes.
When he collapsed over me for a moment, I thought that he had died but then he moaned, which was an indication that he was alive. After a few minutes, he pulled me under himself and slept over me without caring that he had been pressing me under his weight, making it difficult for me to even breathe.
I have given up the idea of escaping because I have accepted the fact that I cannot step out of this house without his permission. And by doing so, I will not only end up harming myself but he will also snatch away the privilege of taking with my parents.
He gave me the phone for ten minutes and I talked with my parents at that time. I am relieved to know that they are fine. But he is not giving it to me for free. He demanded kisses in return, although he was somewhat less hard due to my menstrual period.
The only relief that I get is when he is out of the house and every day I pray that he meets an accident and dies.
Suddenly, my thoughts were interrupted by a sharp shake and an impatient growl of my name, “LEONARA ELEANOR. Where are you lost?” He asked out of frustration.
“I…. Uh… Nothing” I shook my head.
His jaw clenched tightly as he curled his palm into fists, trying to suppress his anger. He loses his temper and gets angry at minor issues.
Why, God, why?
How long do I have to tolerate this man?
“Why hasn’t my shirt been ironed?” He snapped, his teeth clenched in frustration.
My brows furrowed as I inspected the wrinkles on his shirt. I was sure I had ironed it while he was in the shower. It has now become my routine to prepare everything before he comes out of the bathroom because this is exactly what he wants. No matter how much I try to show that I am strong, he actually succeeded in breaking a part of me. I am now scared to fight him back.
“WILL YOU RESPOND?” lost in my thoughts, I was jolted back to reality by his furious outburst, causing me to flinch where I stood.
“I will iron it” I responded, my voice subdued.
Looking at the way he was fuming in rage, I don’t see any point in arguing. He gave me the way and kept staring at me as if he just wanted to burn me with his mere gaze. I didn’t want him to hurt me so I got to work quickly.
He stood beside me while I ironed his shirt. His expression practically shook my hand. I don’t like it when people are watching me do something. It made me nervous and I couldn’t do my work properly and the intensity with which he was staring at me made me shiver.
Those five minutes of ironing felt like an eternity. Finally, I handed him the the shirt. But as I turned around, my hand knocked into something, causing it to crash onto the floor, shattering into pieces. It was made of glass, whatever it was.
“YOU!” The devil, who had just calmed down, began shouting again, “Do you even know how expensive it was?”
It seems like he is pissed off for some reason and he is now taking it out on me.
It’s enough.
“I will pay for it” I said in a rude tone. It was my limit for tolerating his bullshit. It’s been days since he has been treating me like trash just because I am not saying anything to him.
“I will make sure that you pay for it!” He retorted.
The intensity in his gaze suggested he might command me to pick up the shattered pieces with my bare hands, but his next words caught me off guard.
“Go get the broom and clean up the mess, ” he instructed.
My eyes widened as I stood rooted in place. Was he letting this go without further Punishment?
Seriously?
He dug his hands into his pocket and raised his brows. “We don’t have a full day, and I have a meeting to attend. Hurry up” he snapped.
I turned on my heel and ran out before he could change his mind. I had to look for the room because I was not sure where the workers kept it. The only person with whom I have become friendly was Grace and she is on leave today.
Moving around, I spotted it, and when I was making my way back to the room, I heard Desy’s voice, which was coming low and muffled.
Driven by curiousity, I momentarily forgot about the task at hand. My feet led me toward the source of the voice m, and I discovered Desy speaking softly on the phone, obviously trying to keep the conversation discreet. Standing outside her room, I hesitated, unable to resist the urge to eavesdrop on her conversation. I knew it was wrong, but my curiosity got the better of me.
“It’s enough, now! Four lives have already been ruined. I wanted you to help me not complicate things even more” she said over the call.
There was so much change in her tone that I can’t believe I am hearing the same Desy I know.
Who is she talking to?
“We already gone through enough. Not anymore. You know that William…”
“LEONARA!” Suddenly, my name boomed throughout the whole house and I flinched at my place.
The voice belongs to none other than the devil himself. She was about to say something about William but he didn’t let me.
“I will talk to you later” she immediately cut the call.
I didn’t want to get caught so I immediately ran directly to our room. There I found Ansell sitting on the edge of the bed with his left leg folded at his feet. I could see a few drops of blood on the with marble.
Has he gotten hurt?
“Where the hell were you?” His voice thundered,, the anger evident as he lifted his head to lock eyes with me.
“I… I was searching for a broom” I stumbled over words as I lied.
“I got hurt because of the mess you created” he seethed.
I know it was my mistake to crash the glass but doesn’t he have eyes? When he knew that there was glass over, what was the point of walking blindly?
And he claims to have fought with people and here he is crying like a kid over a small piece of glass.
“Now what are you waiting for? Come and pluck out this piece of glass from my skin” he shouted once again.
Walking to him, I sat on the floor and he didn’t take time to place his feet on my knee. I didn’t like the position I was in but I better know to pluck out the piece of glass before he plucked in all pieces in my skin.
“Oh my god!” I hear a panicked voice from Desy as she entered the room, her eyes widening at the sight before her.
“Let me bring the first aid box” she said, running away.
He was waiting for me to pluck out the glass piece and I knew that I didn’t have any other option. The position in which he was in seemed like he wanted to assert his dominance over me, which has now become a normal part of my life.
Resigned, I took the glass in between my fingers and gently plucked it out. He could have done this by hand as well but he wanted to humiliate me.
Soon, Desy came back with the first-aid kit. She gave me things one by one and I dressed his wound after cleaning it.
“Is it hurting?” Desy asked his brother, concern quite visible on her face.
“A lot!” he replied.
I am sure he would have cried rivers if he had to bear the same thing he is doing to me.
“Do you need any help?” She asked while I stayed silent.
“Yes, but the one who is responsible for this wound is going to help me the whole day”
“Me?
No way!
“You go and rest” he ordered his sister.
“But….”
“Just do as I saying ” he interjected, his tone leaving no room for further argument.
Giving me one last look, she stood up and left me alone with her brother.
“And you” he turned his attention to me, “Clean up the mess and come to me. You need to be my right leg today, working back and forth on my command” he instructed.
“It is just a small cut. It will heal soon. Why are you exaggerating it so much?” I asked him.
“Do you want me to have you dance over those glass pieces and then ask you to walk on your feet?” He asked.
As much as there was a threat in his words, I couldn’t stop myself from asking.
“Were you dancing over it?”
“Do you think there is anything humorous in our story? X he asked me back, his eyes darkening.
It could have been only if you were not a words from slipping out of my mouth and making him actually do that.
Ignoring him and his stares, I got back to work, cleaning the room. I am not sure what he is going to ask me today. The only thing that I am sure of is that today is going to be a very big day.