CHAPTER SIXTY FIVE
NADIA
I broke his heart; I can’t even find the fragments!
I was scared, really scared… not just for myself, but for Jack. This was one night that would either make or break us!
I wasn’t ready for any of the outcomes!
Jack had come visiting that night, and I should have been excited to have him around again, but I wasn’t. My heart raced as I sat on the couch, the cushions feeling like a sinking ship under my weight.
Jack had always brought a sense of calm to my otherwise chaotic life in school, that served as the battleground for the werewolves. But tonight was different. The tension in the air felt almost palpable, thick like fog, and it suffocated me. I didn’t know how to explain it, but my instincts screamed a warning. I felt like I was teetering on the edge of a cliff, one misstep away from a fall that could shatter everything I had ever known.
Jack strolled in with that familiar grin on his face, his energy lighting up the dimly lit room. “Hey, beauty and Brain!” he said, ruffling my hair playfully as he settled next to me.
I forced a smile, but it did not exactly reach my eyes then mumbled his name.
There was nothing beautiful about my mind that night.
He tried to be playful, leaning in to steal kisses like he always did, perhaps hoping to draw me out of my shell. His lips brushed against mine, and for a second, I contemplated losing myself in that moment, letting the troubles fade away. But I pulled back instead, creating distance between us when I should have collapsed into his arms.
“I can’t. I’m sorry,” I said to him, almost like the words were forced.
Jack frowned, sitting back and studying my face, his eyes searching mine for something. “Nadia, what’s going on with you?” he asked. His voice was soft, but there was an edge of concern that made me uneasy. We had shared countless moments of laughter and light-hearted teasing, and I had never seen him look that serious since we got together.
“It’s strange for you to draw back whenever I play with you,” he commented. “What’s the problem?”
I clenched my hands in my lap, a swirling storm of emotions brewing inside me. I thought for a moment, considering whether telling him the truth was the right thing. Jack cared about me deeply, but I couldn’t shake the fear gnawing at my heart. Would telling him only cause him pain?
“What is eating you up, Nadia?” he pressed, gradually growing frustrated with my silence. The worry in his expression only made my heart ache more, intensifying the inner battle I faced. Finally, my mind raced with decisions. It was better that he knew now, even if it hurt, than for him to find out later from Alex or Sandro…or from even Lara or Bethany…
“I can’t be with you, Jack,” I blurted out, my voice rushed as if the words had escaped before I could catch them.
The instant the words left my lips, silence enveloped us like a thick fog. It felt as if the world had suddenly gone blank, and I felt hollow inside. I couldn’t even look at Jack, afraid to see the heartache I had just inflicted.
“What did you say?” he asked, his voice strained as he processed my words. He seemed to flinch, acting as if he either didn’t hear or didn’t comprehend what I had just said.
The silence stretched on, and I felt embarrassment wash over me. I looked down and mumbled the same words again, more quiet this time. “I can’t be with you.”
“I heard you the first time, Nadia,” his voice was steady, but the underlying pain in his tone was unmistakable. “I was just hoping you wouldn’t say it again.”
“Is this some joke?” he asked, his countenance shifting from confusion to disbelief.
“It’s not a joke, Jack,” I whispered, feeling tears prick at the corners of my eyes. “I’m sorry,” I added, almost as if the words will make it any better.
“Why!?” he asked, sounding almost like he had been forced to spill the word from his throat. The hurt in his gaze cut deeper. It felt like knives scraping against my heart.
I held his hand tightly, desperately wanting him to understand. “I love you, Jack, but I’m mated to Alex and Sandro and even as we don’t want ourselves, our wolves are still coming around.”
The shock on his face was gut-wrenching, as if I had just delivered a physical blow. His eyes widened, and for the first time, I could sense the sheer level of betrayal and anger wash over him. “That’s impossible! How can you be mated to the same people who bully you and make your life miserable!?” he questioned, his voice raising as his emotions took control.
His fury echoed in the room, filling the space with a palpable tension. Jack looked different from the one I had grown to know and love. The hurt radiating from him only intensified my own pain, making my heart ache.
“Jack, please,” I began to explain, but the words didn’t come. I wanted to make him see that this was not a choice I made willingly. “I didn’t want this. I didn’t ask for it!”
He shook his head furiously, his expression hardening. “You don’t want this? Then reject the mate bond!” His voice was filled with a fierce determination that made my heart sink.
“I can’t, Jack,” my voice trembled as desperate tears threatened to spill over. “You don’t understand!”
“Don’t you love me?” he shot back, his eyes searching mine for reassurance. “Do you love them more than me? Is that it?” Accusations flew from his lips, and he pointed a finger at me, his voice dripping with bitterness. “I know you’ve slept with them! You’ve been sleeping around with them!”
That accusation hurt in a way I couldn’t articulate. It hit me like a wave crashing against a rocky shore, pushing my emotions into a whirlwind. My wolf thrummed inside me, riled up and defensive.
“Don’t say that!” I growled, my voice low and fierce. Jack’s arrogance made my wolf want to retaliate even further, threatening to unleash the storm that raged within. “You don’t know what you’re talking about!”
But he continued. “You’re lying! You’re just using me! Why else would you be with them unless you wanted to? Why did you make me believe you truly cared about me!? Why!?”
I was at my breaking point, my chest tightening as emotions swirled dangerously high. “You need to leave,” I commanded, feeling my wolf clawing at the edges of my consciousness, desperate to tear past the surface.
Stunned, Jack took a step back. “If I walk out this door, I won’t come back again,” he said flatly, but I could see the hesitation in his eyes as fear crept in.
“Leave!” I shouted, my voice steady even though my heart screamed otherwise. I struggled to suppress my wolf, who was desperate to protect me, tearing itself apart inside.
“Fine! I’ll leave!” he said, anger sparking in his eyes. “I should have known better. There’s nothing special about you! You’re just like the others!” With those words, he stormed out, leaving anger and despair swirling in his wake.
I watched him through the window as he got into his car and sped off into the night. The world felt hollow, a great chasm opening up inside of me. The starkness of his departure throbbed like a wound that refused to heal.
As soon as he was gone, I slammed the door shut and let out a loud growl, the sound ripping from my throat as I crumpled to the floor. A sob escaped my lips as I curled into a ball, the weight of my heartache crashing down around me. I had lost him, and my wolf felt it too-longing for the company of Alex and Sandro, craving their presence even in the midst of chaos.
My mind swirled with confusion, anger, and despair, trapped in a conflict of loyalty and connection. Jack was right in many ways-how could I be mated to two people who tormented me? But the bond I had with Alex and Sandro was not something I could easily cast aside.
I wanted to reject them, but I found myself wanting them by my side, cuddling me…
With every breath, I felt my wolf growing restless, agitated. I was stuck at the center of the chaos, and no matter how hard I tried to make sense of it, it felt like a tempest was brewing, threatening to tear me apart.
“Oh, Jack, I’m sorry I hurt you. But I can’t help it! My heart and soul belongs to Alex and Sandro,” I whispered under my breath.