Chapter Thirty-three
Hunter’s POV
I sat in my office, staring at the stack of papers in front of me, but none of the words registered in my head.
My thoughts were constantly disrupted by thoughts of Faelen… As always. The memory of the feel of her skin, her scent… that was all I could think about.
Ever since the awkward moment here in my office, when I’d been just inches away from her, everything had escalated for me.
We had been so close, I could feel the heat radiating off her skin. That moment had stirred something wild in me… and it was something I didn’t want to admit.
I leaned back in the chair, lifting my eyes to the ceiling, fighting against the frustration that had built up in my chest. “Why the hell can’t I stop thinking about her?”
It didn’t make any sense and yet it felt completely right. I had fought it from the start, but it was becoming impossible to resist.
She was in my head constantly now, and I didn’t know how to deal with that.
“Dammit.”
I stood up and started to pace around the room, trying to burn off the restless energy coursing through me.
Faelen had some kind of magical hold on me, and I hated how powerless I felt to it. I just wasn’t used to feeling this way.
As Alpha, I was the one who controlled everything, but now? I couldn’t even control my own thoughts.
And the worst part? It’s that I didn’t even really want to anymore.
The truth hit me like a punch in the face. I wanted her close to me. I wanted to see her, feel her presence… always.
And it wasn’t just the physical attraction… though that part was undeniable… but there was something else…
A mate bond? No, it can’t be.
I had never believed in such things, for myself at least. I hated admitting it, but I was drawn to her in a way one would describe a mate bond… which I couldn’t explain.
I stopped pacing and ran a hand through my hair. “Enough of this.” I muttered.
I needed to see Faelen that moment. I couldn’t keep pretending like she didn’t have an effect on me.
Maybe if I confronted it, confronted her with it, I may be able to figure out what the hell was happening between us.
I existed the office a few minutes later and decided to stroll around the estate casually. Who knows? Perhaps I would sight her.
It was unusual of me to walk around the estate, but lately, Faelen had got me doing things I wouldn’t do before.
I felt quite strange seeing the servants and estate staffs in the hallways as I walked, everyone bowing their heads slightly in respect as I passed them.
Being such an indoor person… going only from my office to my quarters, or outside of the estate entirely… I imagined it was strange to them seeing me around today.
After going around the dinning room and towards the kitchens, I sighted Faelen in one of the common rooms, organizing a pile of items for decorations… or something like that.
She was focused, not even noticing me at first as I approached slowly. And for a moment, I just stood there, watching her.
It felt good… The way her long hair fell around her shoulders, the firm concentration on her face… it made my heart race a little.
“Oh my God,” I whispered to myself impossible for her to hear.
Only fighting or training made my heart race. But now the thought and sight of Faelen had shockingly joined the short list.
I definitely never expected anyone to have this much of an effect on me… least of it her.
Taking a deep breath, “Faelen,” I said, my voice low but audible enough.
She jumped slightly, a little startled by my voice, then turned to face me, her eyes wide with realization.
There was that nervousness in her eyes again, the same tension from before.
“Yes, Alpha?” she replied, dropping whatever was in her hands and bowing slightly.
I didn’t say anything at first. I just looked at her, trying to figure out what the hell it is that I was feeling for this… girl.
But the more I stared, the harder it became to understand it, but also to deny its existence.
I took a few steps closer to her. My hand then reached out almost instinctively when I stood right in front of her.
This time, when I touched her arm, it wasn’t awkward or rushed. It was deliberate.
Though seeming surprised by my action, Faelen didn’t pull away… in fact, she seemed to allow my touch.
“I’ve been thinking…” I started, but couldn’t finish the sentence. The words had come out before I could even stop them.
It felt strange trying to say something out loud to her, but also… a liberating. Our gaze into each other intense, I watched as her expression shifted a little, her eyes softening with understanding.
“I… I,” she said but stopped too, though I suspected hers was intentional, providing a poetic moment of silent understanding between us.
Her voice trembled a little though, which suggested she was equally nervous. But we both knew there was no mistake in her words.
My heart pounded at her boldness. The tension between us grew thick, and I stepped even closer until I was standing and feeling the warmth of her breath against mine.
Our eyes never left each other’s even as I stood taller than her. I took my other hand and placed it on her waist, testing the moment, and she didn’t resist or repel from my touch.
If anything, she seemed to give into me, those gorgeously large almond-shaped eyes never leaving mine.
I leaned in, my lips hovering just above hers, waiting to see if she would make the first move.
I could feel the electricity already built up. The unspoken desire that coursed through our bodies joining.
And then, she closed the distance completely, brushing her lips against mine, but hesitating. If I didn’t know better, I’d say she was teasing me.
Maybe she was.
That moment I blocked every thought in my head and pressed my lips softly against hers, taking in the taste of het.
This kiss wasn’t like the first one in the hallway that awkward night. It wasn’t rushed or unexpected. It was slow, deliberate, and full of everything we both resisted saying.
Slowly, I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her closer, and for once, I wasn’t thinking about control or even my reputation.
We were someplace where anyone could walk in, but I didn’t feel like the Alpha at that moment. I was just a man who had been drawn to this woman, and I didn’t want to let go.
When we finally pulled apart, both of us breathless, I rested my forehead against hers, my hands still on her waist.
I didn’t know what to say, but I didn’t need to either. The connection between us was undeniable now. Whatever it was, it was real.
“Faelen…” I started, my voice a soft whisper, “I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop.”
She looked up at me, her eyes full of the same longing I felt inside me. Her breath was shallow, her lips red and swollen from the kiss.
And right then, I knew this wasn’t just some casual desire. It wasn’t even something I could walk away from.
I’d tried to actually. I had fought it and hard. But I was losing, and I was starting to think that I didn’t even want to win.
Before I could say anything else, she whispered, “I don’t want you to stop.”
Her words shattered what little caution I had left in me. I cupped her face in my hands, staring deeper into her eyes, searching for something… anything that would make this any easier.
This was madness. But it was… our madness, as it felt absolutely so.
I kissed her again, slower this time, more deliberate. I needed to feel every part of her, to allow her into me, and let her consume whatever was left of my senses.
I was done pretending and trying to fight it.
But then something shifted. A sense of guilt or fear… I didn’t know which… crept into the back of my mind, and I pulled back, my chest rising.
I then turned away from her, and ran a hand through my hair. What the hell was I doing? I couldn’t let this happen.
“That’s enough,” I forced out the words from my throat, not daring to look back at her
I felt her freeze behind me, the tension that was beginning to ease off thickening again.
I didn’t dare turn around or meet her eyes, because if I did, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stop myself from pulling her back into my arms.
There was a long, painful silence before she finally spoke. “Yes, Alpha.”
Her voice was low, confused, and sounded disappointed. Still, I didn’t turn around. I just couldn’t… Not if I wanted to keep any sense of control.
Facing the inner walls of the room, just so I wouldn’t look at her face, I heard her footsteps as she left the room, the door clicking shut behind her.
Only then was I able to let my breath out, which I didn’t even realized I was holding. “What the hell is happening to me?”