“Not a great relationship?” I asked into the darkness. A slight breeze of A/C wafted over us, prickling at my sweaty back.
“He was gay,” Cassie said, “I was just a distraction so he could hook up with the starting tight end.”
I don’t know why, but her disdainful tone made me chuckle.
“So, in college, I made sure to find the best man on campus. He was devastatingly handsome, his family was fucking rich, the whole package. The problem was, he knew it.”
I frowned in sympathy, though I knew Cassie couldn’t see it.
“My mom loved him, of course.” She made her voice an octave higher. “Oh, when are you bringing Pierce around, he’s so dreamy. You’re so lucky.”
I laughed at her imitation.
“It took me almost two years to figure out that it was abuse,” Cassie said, “And it took another three to escape.”
“That was the nude video,” I said, remembering Cassie’s confession from our first night in the hot tub.
“Please don’t Google it,” Cassie said, her voice cracking.
“Of course not,” I said.
Cassie continued on like she hadn’t heard me.
“After that disaster, I knew I wanted someone that I could trust. An older man who’d act like a grown up and wouldn’t play games. Jack made sense for me. He was an adult, finally. It didn’t hurt that he had money. He takes good care of me. In that way, anyway.”
The car still wasn’t moving. My eyes kept searching the dark, but there was nothing to see. I reached for Cassie’s leg and found it, giving her knee a squeeze.
“So, you’re happy?” I asked, “Finally?”
“What you said before,” Cassie said, “About sharing. You want to know something stupid and sad? I actually don’t like it all that much. I mean, it was fun when Jack and I started doing it. But now? I feel like I’m just another object. A plaything that can be tossed to the side whenever he’s bored of me.”
Cassie let out another deep sigh. She continued.
“Emily doesn’t want a family? I’d love a family. A home, not a house. Surrounded by people who love me. But Jack’s over all that. He wants to have fun, so we have fun.”
The car lurched, then started to roll forward. It was only a crawl. The world around us stayed dark.
“When I saw Michael at the pool four days ago, that memory of high school came back,” Cassie said, “He was cute and funny. Kind of geeky but in a fun way, you know? Michael was the kind of guy I would totally fall for, except my mom would never let me. Not ‘special’ enough for her precious girl. So, when I saw him again, I thought it would be fun to pretend for a little bit. Be with someone who’d treat me right, for once.”
The Peoplemover finally picked up speed. We came around a corner and back out into the park. The lights of Tomorrowland suddenly seemed so bright. I saw Cassie’s face was wet with tears.
“Mike’s a good guy,” I said. It was hard to concede it, honestly. Especially after I’d seen him kissing my wife. But I had to admit he’d grown on me, somehow.
“Michael’s like everyone else,” Cassie said, “I’m just a trophy to him. Something to brag about. He’d mount my head on his wall if he could.”
“It was the facial,” I said, thinking back to what might have changed Cassie’s mind. “Wasn’t it?”
Cassie’s pursed her lips, wryly
“I want to be loved,” she said. A little sob slipped out. “Not wanted or desired or… I see how you look at Emily. Like your whole world revolves around her. Even when she’s fucking Jack, when you’re with Allison, you still stare after her like she’s the brightest thing in the whole universe.”
I grabbed Cassie’s hands, tight. The tears spilled down her face, anew. Even miserable, she looked so beautiful. But that was the problem, right? That’s all anyone ever saw: a gorgeous woman. And never the actual human being inside with the same imperfections and doubts that everyone else carries. I realized that I found that person, the actual Cassie, so much more beautiful than the character she played to protect herself.
Carefully, because the car was very much in motion, I moved across the bench and sat next to Cassie. Wrapped my arm around her shoulder and gently stroked her hair. She sobbed into my chest, then sniffled.
“You’re a good listener, you know that?” Cassie said.
“It’s easy when you don’t talk,” I said.
Cassie laughed at that. She sat up. “Sorry,” she said, “I must look a mess.” She did of course. Her makeup was running, and her face was red.
But I shook my head. “You just look like you,” I said.
“I didn’t mean to lay that on you,” Cassie said. I saw the mask slowly slip back over her face. “I’m a big girl. I’ll be fine.”
The ride made a huge deal about how it would continue on forever, then it dropped us off back at the station where we’d started. As we rode the escalator down, my phone buzzed in my pocket. It was Emily, texting me that the group was going to meet up and watch the fireworks back on Main Street.
I showed the text stream to Cassie, who nodded dutifully. She grabbed my hand, took a deep breath, and started walking us out of Tomorrowland.
The woman I’d been with a moment before disappeared into the evening air.
*
The six of us regrouped on the grass in front of the castle area.
I saw Mike first, standing about half a head above everyone else, waving us over. Emily was pressed next to his side. My petite wife gave me a shy little grin as I came over. She couldn’t have known that I’d caught her kissing Mike earlier, but she looked oddly guilty all the same.
Allison and Jack were already there, bickering playfully with each other. The athletic woman rolled her eyes my way, like she couldn’t believe he was still bothering her, but she was smiling.
“Hope your evening was better than mine,” Allison said, “The treats were good, and the parade was awesome but my company? Blech!” She stuck her tongue out at Jack and he responded by trying to bite it. Both of them cackled.
“Well, we had a ton of fun!” Cassie started into it immediately, running through the list of rides we’d done with an enthusiasm even a Disney-sponsored streamer couldn’t match. “… we went on all three mountains, then did Buzz — I kicked Paul’s ass — and got on the Peoplemover and now we’re here!”
The whole thing sounded so forced to me, so obviously fake-happy. But no one else noticed.
“What about you guys?” Cassie asked. I noticed she was staring right at Emily.
“Oh, we just hung around,” Emily said, evasive. “Saw some characters.”
“Winnie the Pooh. All seven of the dwarfs. Jafar,” Mike ticked them off his fingers.
“We tried for Jack Skellington but the line was too long,” Emily said.
“All of you were so well behaved,” Cassie said with a knowing smirk, “I’m disappointed in you.”