I looked at her for a moment. She was that shy girl I didn’t know again. I reached over and took her hand in mine, squeezing it gently.
“It’s already special,” I said, knowing how hokey it sounded but continuing anyway. “Just being here with you.”
She glanced at me and flashed a grin before picking up the menu and going through it with me. When she lifted the menu off the table, there were rose petals littered about the table.
I glanced from them to her, and even in the low light of the private booth, I saw her blush. Was my sister a hopeless romantic? She’d never shown any sign of being one before, at least not to me. If that were the case, it was adorable and made me change how I saw her. Certain other things about her made more sense to me.
I leaned over and kissed her lightly without pretense.
“What was that for?” Remmi asked when I leaned back from her.
“Because I didn’t know how much of a sweetie you were.” I smiled kindly at her.
She cleared her throat and turned back to the menu.
Dinner was terrific and I didn’t complain about having to cook my own food… and having absolutely no idea what I was doing. But it was fun. Even with me holding my tongue continuously, I enjoyed the time with my sister.
By the time they brought out the big bowl of melted chocolate and put it on the table, I was having a really good time. The glass of wine Remmi had bought me was helping as well.
“OK, what’s the deal?” Remmi said, stirring a slice of strawberry around in the delicious chocolate.
“What do you mean?” I asked, trying to imitate her but worried my strawberry might fall off my stick.
“Don’t get me wrong, you’ve been a wonderful–”
“Date?” I finished for her, causing her to look at me and nod.
“Yeah. But… you haven’t been… yourself,” Remmi finished.
“You mean my crude, brash and crass self?” I asked, finishing off my wine.
Remmi seemed to debate with herself before saying, “Well, yeah.”
I grinned and tried to slip the dripping strawberry into my mouth without making a mess.
“Well,” I said, grinning. “I am on a date, you know. I’m trying to make a good impression here.”
Remmi studied me for a minute with one of her looks. “Well, one: I appreciate it. Two: I didn’t know you could reign yourself in like that.”
I frowned at her.
“And three: I wanted a date with… you,” she said.
“But–” I started.
“The real you. That’s who… I want to be with,” Remmi said.
Now, it was my turn to study her for a moment. Then, I very delicately placed a piece of banana on my stick and stirred it in the chocolate. Once it was good and coated, I took it out and held it out for her.
She glanced at me a moment before leaning in. Just as she opened her mouth to take it, I lifted it and booped her, smearing chocolate on the tip of her nose.
Remmi started to make a disgusted sound, but when she opened her mouth, I shoved the piece of banana in, grinning like an idiot.
Snapping her mouth closed, she glared at me and reached for her napkin, but I grabbed her hands under the table. When she looked at me questioningly, I nodded for her to lean towards me. When she did, I kissed the tip of her nose, cleaning the chocolate off with my lips.
The entire night, our server had been ultra polite and had made noise as they approached. They even knocked and waited a few seconds before peeking behind the curtain. I had the feeling more than a few make-out sessions had gone on back here.
So, I wasn’t worried when I continued to hold her hands under the table and began to kiss her. Gently at first, but then deeper the longer the kiss went on.
I released her hands and grabbed her by the waist, pulling her to me. I tasted the mix of wine and chocolate on her tongue and didn’t let up as I felt her start to let out tiny moans into my mouth.
After a moment, she came up, panting for air and leaning against me. I simply held her, feeling her racing heart eventually begin to slow.
“You going to tell me the story before or after?” I asked quietly. I’d been wondering what all this was about since our little talk in the shower.
“Who says there’s a story?” my sister asked.
“You did,” I said simply. “Every time you ask me.”
“Ask you what?” She looked up at me from where she was still leaning against me. When my only answer was a look, she continued, “Oh. That.”
Then, she was quiet for a while, so I started feeding her other chocolate-covered tidbits from the bowl.
“I know it’s probably hard for you to believe, but… I have problems with men. Women, for some reason, are much easier to be with. But men… it’s like they aren’t the same species as we are,” Remmi said quietly.
“I understand, but they’re not all like that,” I reminded her.
“I know… I just haven’t run into any. Every man I’ve… tried to be with has been a complete jerk!” She glanced up at me again as I slipped a chocolate-covered marshmallow into her mouth. “They start out kind and gentle and loving, but when the clothes come off, they turn into something else.”
“To be fair…” I started.
“I’ve seen what you become, Ash, and it’s not the same,” Remmi said, reminding me she’d watched Terri’s and my broadcasts.
“Every time I tried, they’d turn into something ugly that I didn’t want anything to do with. I’d either turn them out cold, making up some excuse, or I’d do anything else but… just to get rid of them,” Remmi said.
“So, you stuck to girls. There’s nothing wrong with that. Girls are a lot of fun,” I said honestly.
“Yeah… but they don’t–”
“There’s all sorts of things that can simulate… that,” I said, trying not to be crude even though she said to be myself.
“I’ve done that Ash… I don’t want something fake. I want the real thing.”
“Well, there are professionals–”
“I want something REAL, Ash,” Remmi said with more force than I expected.
“Hey, I know some professionals that are kind and caring and–”
“Ash… shut up,” she said.
I shut up and sighed. “So… are you looking for a relationship or just a fuckbuddy?” I tried to say it gently, but fuckbuddy is kind of a blunt word.
“A fu–no!” Remmi started, then, after a moment, continued more quietly, “I don’t know. I just… want to know what I’m missing. Am I missing out on something? I guess I’m too much of a coward to just to go through with it just to find out. I’ve heard so many horrible stories about women who men have used just for sex and the aftermath.”
“You could just wait,” I offered.
“Are you trying to back out on me too?” Remmi pulled away from me.
“What? Are you kidding?” I looked at her in shock. “I’d take you right here if you asked… but I wouldn’t recommend it. These booths are way too small!” I tried for some levity.
Remmi looked at me, stone-faced. Just when I thought I’d screwed up, she smiled.
“Remmi, I’ve told you how beautiful and amazing you are. How jealous I get of you sometimes. Even before my… change, I had the stray thought of you.”
“Really?” She looked shocked.
“Yeah,” I nodded. “It’s kind of hard not to when I’m so close to… that,” I said, motioning to all of her. You’re kind of the whole package, you know?”