SEBASTIAN’S POV
Roland’s call comes through just after dinner, and I step out onto the balcony,
the cool night air brushing against my face.
The stars are out, shimmering against the inky sky. But tonight, for some reason, the beauty of it feels incomplete, like it’s missing something. Or maybe someone. I hit accept and brought the phone to my ear.
“She’s alright,” Roland says the moment he hears my voice, skipping any formalities.
The relief that floods me is unexpected, almost immediate. I’ve only been gone a few hours, but my thoughts have already drifted to Sasha more than I care to admit.
“Good,” I say, a bit too quickly.
Roland chuckles on the other end. “Someone sounds eager.”
“Just doing my job,” I reply, attempting a nonchalant tone. “It’s part of the job description, after all, keeping tabs.”
“Is it?” Roland’s voice carries a hint of teasing. “You sure it’s not something more?”
“Funny, Roland. I didn’t call you for dating advice.” But even as I say it, I can feel a smile tugging at the corner of my mouth.
Roland doesn’t relent. “Well, if you ask me, you’re the one that needs it. Couldn’t handle being away from her for a day?”
“It’s not like that,” I say, even though he and I both know better. Sasha’s face comes to mind, her smile, her eyes. It’s… complicated. “I just wanted to make sure things are going smoothly.”
“Mmm, smoothly,” Roland echoes with a chuckle.
“If that’s what you want to call it. But don’t worry. She’s just fine. I might have mentioned that you were expecting her call, though. Thought you’d want her to know.”
That catches me off guard. I lean against the balcony railing, tightening my grip on the phone. “Expecting her call, huh?”
“Figured it might get her to reach out,” he says easily. “You know, help bridge that little distance issue of yours.”
“Much appreciated,” I reply, shaking my head but unable to suppress my grin.
Trust Roland to throw in a nudge where he sees fit. “Though I don’t think I’m the one with the ‘issue,’ as you so kindly put it.”
“You might fool yourself with that one, but you’re not fooling me.” So, Roland pauses, the slight shift in his voice revealing a hint of genuine curiosity, “how exactly are you going to handle the next two weeks without her?”
Two weeks. The thought sends a flicker of irritation through me, mostly because he’s right. In my line of work,
I’m accustomed to solitude, to self-discipline. But with Sasha… I wasn’t expecting the way being away from her gnaws at me, how much the silence of this place feels wrong without her voice filling it. I stay silent, mulling over how to answer.
“Come on,” Roland presses. “You’ve already checked in on her once today. How many times will it be tomorrow?”
I sigh, shaking my head. “Look, I’ve got enough to keep myself occupied.”
“Right. But occupied with what?” he challenges, his tone light but pointed. “Are you actually working, or just pacing around thinking about her?”
“You know, some people would say you’re being nosy, Roland.”
“I’m not ‘some people,'” he shoots back.
“And if you ask me, you’re better off getting your work done fast if you’re so eager to get back to her. You came here to do a job. Do it, and get back to her. Simple.”
“Is that what passes as wisdom these days?”
“Take it or leave it, Sebastian,” he says with a laugh. “It’s better than you obsessing over her every second.”
“I am not obsessing,” I reply, though the moment the words leave my mouth, I can feel the lie in them. Roland knows it, too.
“Sure, sure. You keep telling yourself that.” He pauses, letting the silence stretch just long enough for me to feel its weight.
“Look, you know I’ll keep an eye on her for you. That’s why I’m here. And if anything anything comes up, you’ll be the first to know.”
I sigh, the weight lifting slightly from my shoulders. “Thanks, Roland. For… all of it.”
“No need for gratitude, just doing my job. The same one you should be doing, by the way,” he teases.
“Understood. But Roland,” I say, lowering my voice slightly, “keep an eye out. I don’t know what it is, but something feels off. Maybe it’s nothing, but…”
Roland’s tone shifts, becoming serious. “I’ll watch out for her. You don’t have to worry about that.”
I take a breath, letting his words sink in. Roland has always been loyal, always someone I could count on, especially where Sasha is concerned.
I trust him, more than I trust most people. “Good. That’s… that’s good to hear.”
“And, Sebastian?” Roland adds, with that same teasing edge creeping back in.
“Next time you get a moment, maybe think about telling her how you feel. Would save you a lot of these sleepless nights.”
“Noted,” I reply, trying to brush off the weight of his words, but it’s hard when I know there’s some truth to them.
I look out at the city lights below, the distant sounds of life carrying up to me, all of it just background noise compared to the silence Sasha’s absence has left behind.
“Take care, Roland.”
“You too. And remember, don’t drive yourself crazy. You’re halfway there as it is.”
I can’t help but laugh. “Goodbye, Roland.”
“See you soon, boss,” he says, hanging up with a chuckle. The line goes silent, leaving me standing on the balcony, the night air cool against my skin.
I pocket my phone, leaning against the railing once more, but my thoughts are far from here. Maybe Roland’s right. Maybe I am halfway there already, already halfway to something I hadn’t planned for.