Sai continued stroking my hair, a restful, comforting feeling, and I must have fallen asleep with her doing that, because the next thing I knew was Sai kissing me as she got up, sunlight streaming through the bedroom window.
She left the room and I heard her walking down the stairs, faint domestic noises from the kitchen, then footsteps coming back up again. Sai edged into the room with a tray with toast, butter, Seville marmalade, and two cups of coffee.
“Come on Harry, pitch-in, it’s getting cold!” she smiled, sitting down cross-legged on the bed and buttering a slice of toast.
We ate in silence, no need for conversation just yet, mulling over the previous evening.
I looked at Sai and she smiled back, good, we weren’t at war any more, and held my hand out to her. Sai moved the tray over to the dresser and slid onto the bed next to me, resting her head against my shoulder, putting her arm through mine and patting me affectionately.
“So Harry, do you want to tell me about it?” she asked, “It must have been a really terrible nightmare, I’ve never heard of you having one before. I know you were dreaming about Gran, so talk to me.”
I was still a little reluctant to go back there, the remembered feeling from last night was still too strong, but I owed her that much, at least.
“I dreamt I was out with Gran, shopping in Birmingham, and I let go her hand, and then she was gone, and I got really frightened, and the whole town centre was deserted….” I could feel the tears trying to come back, the memory of the dream echoing and resonating in my mind, and had to swallow several times.
“Then she was there, and then it was you, and I thought you were the dream and Gran was waking me up, God, it was so real, I so wanted it to be real!”
Sai stroked my hair, looking pensive, almost upset, tears glimmering in her eyes.
“I know what you mean, Harry; when my Ah-Ma, mummy, died, I had the same dreams, losing her and finding her again, and then finding her gone for real. Back home they call it ‘Shi ji’e Jing shen’ when you dream yourself into the spirit world, where the ancestors wait for you. It’s a good dream to have; it means they’re showing you they’re still here, just not… here. Can you understand what I mean?”
She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, smiling brightly at me.
I did, and looked at Sai with new respect; of course, she’d been here as well, she’d had to do this, and now more than ever, I understood how much I needed her with me.
“Sai, I was a crass, boorish, bloody idiot last night, I was so wrong to assume that you wanted to… you know, and I’m sorry, I should have known better. Can you forgive me?”
She grinned her usual, slightly cheeky grin.
“Of course, Harry, just don’t ever make assumptions like that about me again. There’s more to me than just appetites, you know!”
I had definitely come to understand that.
“I know,” I said, “you’ve got a tasty right hook, for a start!”
Sai immediately looked contrite, quickly examining my face for marks or signs where she’d belted me one. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that, compared to what happened on the rugby pitch in the normal course of a game, what she’d hung on me was barely a love-tap, so I tried to look as though I was being manly and hiding my suffering. Eventually she figured it out, thumping me on the chest, and we were alright again.
It was enjoyable to lay back and hold her to me for a while, but we had to be getting back to London; I had work, and Sai was staying with me now until at least the funeral, which could be several weeks away, due to the circumstances of Gran’s death; according to what dad had told Sai, Gran had sat down to watch TV after making tea, dozed off, and when Grandpa tried to wake her, she’d gone, just like that.
I called dad, and told him we’d stop by on our way back, and checked to see how Grandpa was doing. Dad said he seemed fine, sad, but not sunk in the depths of despair or anything like that, more resigned and accepting than anything else.
Some of the neighbourhood ladies had been in again, and made them breakfast, which seemed to amuse dad in a wistful sort of way; he’d forgotten how small towns and villages worked in times of bereavement. Gran had been part of community life for decades, so she had tendrils and connections all over town. All the ladies from the local branch of the Women’s Institute, the dreaded WI, what Grandpa used to call ‘that bunch of harpies’ had been in and out, dropping off cakes, buns, quiches and pies.
“I don’t know who’s going to eat them all, you’d better take some with you!” said dad. He’d tried to slip me some money last night to cover the additional expense of having Sai with me, but I declined, I was earning some good money from the university loan-out programme right now; Sai showed no such compunction, however…
Once I hung up I felt a lot better knowing that dad and Grandpa were handling it well, better than me, anyway. As I lay back, daydreaming about Gran, Sai came back in the room, stripped off her pyjamas to take a shower, and began rummaging in my linen closet for a bath towel. The sight of her lithe, sexy body did strange things to me. Grief-stricken as I was, her beautiful, desirable body was a very human reminder of the life around us still, that we were still alive, and I realised that, despite the present circumstances, I wanted, I needed her badly right now.
“Sai, can you come over here please?” I asked her, and she cocked her head toward me, a quizzical expression on her face. “Sure thing baby, something up?” she asked, completely oblivious to her nude state.
“I want to apologise again, and I want to hold you for a while, is that alright with you?” I told her, and she smiled back, a knowing expression flitting across her face.
“Harry, I always want you to hold me, and you’ve already apologised enough, just hold me so I can make you feel better for a while!”
She slid into bed next to me, sliding her arm around my waist, pulling me down to cradle my head against her.
“I know you’re hurting now, baby, but I promise you, it gets better. The pain will go away, I promise you, and only the memories will be left. It did for me, it will for you.”
She kissed me on my cheek, her lips soft and warm, and I turned and kissed her on her lips, feeling her kiss me back, her arms wrapping around my neck to pull me in close.
We slid down the bed, hands caressing and holding, touching and squeezing as we kissed. Sai reached out and took my rapidly hardening cock as my fingers trailed down her flat abdomen to her silky pubic hair, ruffling my fingertips through the silken gloss of them before seeking out her moistness, and sliding up and down her labial crease. Sai moaned and shifted, her body responding to the feel of my fingers as I slid one inside her moist warmth, rubbing the hood of her clitoris.
Sai groaned as my stimulation of her ramped up a notch. Her hand began to pump my cock, flexing and squeezing as she did so, my finger pumping into her in time to her pumping of me. Now her eyes opened, and she looked up at me, telling me what she wanted me to do, and I slid between her parted thighs, raised up so she could position me, and slowly pushed in, sliding my cock into her in one slow thrust, backing out and thrusting again, and again, building up a rhythm.
She pumped her hips against mine, meeting me thrust for thrust, grinding herself against me with every thrust, pulling me into her with her strong legs, her kisses hot and fervent, until at last she climaxed, wailing out loud as she came, the contractions in her vaginal tube milking me of every drop of my sperm as I shot rope after rope of spunk into her.
Finally we were done, that unique sadness that came with the aftermath of lovemaking infusing me as I fell back to the bed, lying next to her as she huddled against me, her heartbeat loud and fast. We said nothing to each other, there was no need; our love for each other was conversation enough for now.
We stopped in to see Grandpa and dad, commiserating some more, making tentative arrangements for how to deal with the funeral once the Coroner had adjourned the inquest, then sped off back to London. I was driving this time, Sai was really shattered from her emotional storm last night, then watching over me all night long, so I left her to snooze while I piloted the Cherokee back to London, with a picnic hamper in the back stuffed with Sai’s pick of the WI cakes and biscuits…
We arrived back at the flat mid-afternoon, lugged our stuff back upstairs, and called it a day. I quickly phoned Professor Dickson’s office to let him know where I’d been, and collapsed into bed, completely worn-out. The last thing I remember was Sai mumbling in her sleep, turning over and burrowing down against me, her warmth and slow deep breathing quickly sending me off.