No grief was more painful than this. It felt as if the sky had collapsed and crushed her body beyond endurance. All the hopes once built, all the prayers once made, shattered to pieces without a trace.
Rowena could not hold back the pain. Her bones seemed crushed, reduced to meaningless fragments. Her breath was choked and the tightness in her chest grew. Then there were merciless, sharp claws, cruelly squeezing her heart.
The torment was brutal. God should not have created such a cruel fate. No human could bear it, including Rowena. She couldn’t bear to lose Ivan, especially in such a tragic way.
Rowena tried to bear it. She tried to get up, to stand slowly and look far, as if she could pierce the deepening darkness of the night.
There was no more commotion. No more howling and growling of wolves. No more sounds of fighting; it was all over.
Rowena moved with shaking legs. She forced herself to walk, to push through the magical barrier, back to the place where she had left Ivan.
Her faltering steps were momentarily halted by the bushes that wrapped around her legs. She almost fell. She barely managed to stay upright when she saw Ivan’s lifeless body lying on the ground from a distance.
“Who’s there?”
Rowena ignored Graham’s question and kept walking. She paid no attention to the Frostholm Pack staring at her in confusion. Her only wish was to see Ivan one last time.
Ivan lay motionless in his human form. His body was covered in wounds and blood continued to ooze, soaking the ground.
Rowena closed her eyes. The pain she felt seemed to increase. Even though she thought she had reached the maximum limit of suffering, that wasn’t the case. Every ache and pain continued to hit her with multiple layers of agony.
Rowena’s remaining strength vanished in an instant. Her body had no strength left. She fell to her knees beside Ivan. Gathering her resolve, she reached out, her trembling fingers touching Ivan’s cheek.
It still felt warm. But Rowena could no longer feel any signs of life in Ivan’s body. Everything had faded, and she couldn’t resist the urge to caress Ivan’s face, as if she wanted to etch every detail of Ivan’s beauty into her memory.
Rowena had sunk into a sea of grief. She was submerged, darkness shading her eyes, blurring her vision of the world.
The face that had once been filled with a warm smile was now frozen in eternal silence. There would be no more gentle voice calling his name. No more echoes of longing echoing through the Amerotha forest. No more peaceful embraces. Only a cold and painful silence remained.
An emptiness reigned. Rowena’s soul was slowly being eaten away. Half of it had gone with Ivan.
“Rowena.”
Rowena opened her eyes. She took a deep breath, hoping it would help her regain control. Instead, the air she inhaled turned into thousands of needles piercing her lungs. She choked on the pain that crushed her heart.
Rowena tried not to shed any tears. She couldn’t cry in front of Graham and the warriors of the Frostholm Pack. So, she bit her lower lip hard until the salty taste of blood hit her tongue moments later.
Rowena stood up and spoke in a voice so faint it was almost carried away by the night breeze. “Ivan left with pride. The last memory that filled his mind in his last moments was the happiness of having been born into the Frostholm Pack.”
For the Frostholm Pack had given Ivan a wonderful life. Kinship and brotherhood. Also, a love that colored his days-Rowena.
Graham was silent for a moment. Then he spoke. “Thank you, Rowena.” His face showed anguish as he drew a breath. “We came too late, but at least we didn’t let Ivan fight alone in the end.” He swallowed hard, the lump in his throat noticeable. “Thank you for telling us about the attack.”
Rowena’s brow furrowed in confusion. She turned to look at Graham, not understanding his words. But Graham continued to speak as she wanted to ask.
“Now, I will take Ivan’s body to the palace. We must arrange an honorable burial for him immediately.”
Rowena couldn’t say a word. She couldn’t do anything. It wasn’t that she wanted to hinder Graham’s good intentions, but a part of her still wanted to be with Ivan. Despite the fact that Ivan was already gone, she still wanted to be with him. At the very least, she wanted to hold Ivan’s hand, plant a kiss on his lips, and give him a warm hug.
Rowena knew that this was her last chance to touch Ivan. Once Graham took Ivan’s body, she wouldn’t be able to do anything.
So here she was. Standing in place, doing nothing, unable to do anything. She could only watch Ivan’s departure and endure the pain that constantly gripped her heart.
They carried Ivan’s body with great care. As they took him away, Rowena’s body went numb. Her eyes went blank, and she realized that it wasn’t Graham who was taking Ivan away, but fate, acting without any emotion.
Ironically, the departure of Graham and the Frostholm warriors was a slap in the face for Rowena. It symbolized to her that Ivan had truly abandoned her.
Rowena clenched her hands at her sides, trying to steady herself. Her eyes remained fixed, taking in every second that passed before Ivan disappeared from view.
“Forgive me.”
A voice made Rowena blink. She turned to see a warrior approaching her with a face full of remorse.
“I should have listened to you.”
Confusion struck Rowena. She didn’t understand the warrior’s words, especially since she didn’t recognize him. His face was unfamiliar to her.
“If I had listened to you, maybe Ivan wouldn’t be dead now,” the warrior said again, full of regret. “Forgive me for not believing you.”
After that, the warrior left, rejoined his party, and headed out of Amerotha Forest. Rowena was left alone, haunted by confusion.
*