Erica’s POV
His lips were cold. They didn’t move against mine. The taste of lunch clung to his tongue.
His hands were still. They didn’t even wrap around my waist. My heart was beating fast. Did I offend him? Was he angry with me?
I pulled away from him. His dark et eyes refused to meet mine and my heart did a nervous flip. Maybe he knew. Maybe he knew about Dante and I.
“Lorenzo, what’s wrong?”
My voice was soft. My panic and fear were the only real emotions. My brain was working overtime.
He looked at me. His dark eyes seemed distant, apathetic in fact. His lack of response showed that he wasn’t in the mood, or, maybe I hadn’t riled him up yet.
Was a blowjob in order?
I nearly hurled in my mind. I couldn’t do that to him. Not after I had done it so many times to…
“Lorenzo?”
“I’m fine, Erica,” he said slightly coldly. “I just don’t know how to feel about all of this. I love you too but I just don’t feel like I’m in the mood right now.”
His words were expressionless and dismissive. Even his ‘ I love you’ didn’t seem genuine. I was a little hurt and part of me was certain that all this was because he hadn’t spent enough time together before now. It had always been me and meetings ever since he came here.
“I’m sorry if I’ve been neglecting you. I just really want to be with you right now.”
That was a lie. I wanted to be far away from him. I wanted to be in my bed, curled up under the covers and sleeping soundly.
That was a lie too.
The deepest parts of my heart and being wanted to be with Dante. I wanted to be in his bed. I wanted to feel his hands around my waist. I wanted to kiss him and taste the expensive whiskey on his tongue.
I didn’t want to do any of this. But here I was, with Lorenzo, my fiance that I felt nothing for all because Laura was pregnant for Dante.
Part of me was furious. Dante had been playing me this entire time. He had been sleeping with Laura as well. How else did she get pregnant?
I pulled myself out of my thoughts and tried to focus on Lorenzo’s handsome dark eyes.
I tried to see myself inside of them but all I could think about was Dante’s piercing green eyes staring back at me.
“Erica…”
I shut Lorenzo up with a kiss.
I was begging him inside my heart. I had to forget Dante. I wanted Lorenzo to make me forget him.
I would be more than happy if he could fuck the very thought of Dante out of me, touch me, and kiss me till forgot what he felt and tasted like.
I was desperate. I felt small tears running down my cheeks. I had tried to hold them back but it was too late. They fell softly on Lorenzo’s face.
I kept my eyes closed and prayed that he wouldn’t ask me what was wrong.
Almost instinctively, he grabbed my waist and pulled me close to him.
Life came to his lips and he kissed me back.
I was thankful for the gesture. He wasn’t as nice as Dante but at least he was kissing me.
Our lips held and locked for a while. His tongue dipped inside mine and his teeth nibbled on my lower lips.
I felt his fingers dig into my skin.
His touch felt foreign but I was going to do anything to get the thought of Dante out of my head.
Lorenzo stood up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He walked to the living room and laid me down on the sofa.
Our lips were still locked together, kissing each other furiously.
My whole body was however irritated by it all. I didn’t feel right. He was my fiance but none of this felt right.
But I didn’t care. I just wanted to get rid of every thought of Dante. This discomfort was my fault to begin with.
I had allowed myself to tolerate his advances, I allowed my body to become accustomed and a slave to his touch to the point that any other person felt like a nasty insect creeping on me.
I made a move to his belt to unbuckle it. He was hard enough. I wanted him to penetrate…
“Erica!”
He pulled away from me and looked at me in horror. His hands were firmly on his belt buckle as he stepped away from me.
I was stunned. I thought… I thought this was going so well. What…what happened?
“Lorenzo?”
My heart had been shattered but the pain was something I was used to. He only shattered my hope of being fucked into forgetting my ex. Nothing more.
The horrified look on his face soon faded away and he relaxed. He took a deep breath and sat beside me.
I was confused but he took my hand and held them in his. His brown eyes stared deep into mine. What was going on?
“Erica, I’m sorry but I can’t…I can’t sleep with you.”
My jaw dropped. Why? Why couldn’t he? I mean, we had done it a few times before, earlier in our relationship. Why doesn’t he want me now?
“Why? Did I do something wrong?”
He took another deep breath and I held mine. Was he cheating…
“I’m not feeling well. After the incident at the airport, I went to the doctor and I explained my symptoms to him. He did a check on me and said that the shockwaves from the explosion at the airport did significant damage to my testicles. I am prohibited from having sex till they heal.”
I was unsure of what to feel. I was happy that he wasn’t cheating but I felt angry that he didn’t tell me about this sooner.
In fiancee-like fashion, I held his hand as well.
“Why didn’t you tell me about this?”
“Erica, I was ashamed. How could I explain that I had an erectile dysfunction from an explosion? It was embarrassing. The times I went out, it was to my doctor and the time you caught me in the bathroom, I was so frustrated that I was trying to force an orgasm. It worsened my situation.”
He squeezed my hands even tighter. Something about his story felt off. When I saw him in the bathroom, his cock looked fine to me.
Maybe it was my mind playing tricks on me, making me see what it wanted me to see.
“Erica, I appreciate everything that you did today”
He kissed the back of my hand tenderly.
“It means a lot to me. I just need to get better.”
I felt a strange feeling in my chest. I wasn’t angry, hurt or disappointed. I guess if I was in his shoes, I’d be embarrassed as well.
But something about this just didn’t add up.
Maybe I was just overthinking it. I had had a long day.
“That’s alright, Lorenzo and I understand your reason for not telling me. I shouldn’t have pushed you…”
“No, Erica. You don’t need to apologize. The meal was wonderful and I appreciate the effort.”
He kissed my forehead and I felt a slight warmth in my heart. I guess today wasn’t a total buzz kill.
Suddenly, an idea came to my head.
I stood up and grabbed my phone that was on the dining table. Lorenzo anxiously followed me to the kitchen.
“Erica, what are you doing?”
“I’m calling Clarissa. I want to make up for today. I think we should all go out together as adults. Clarissa can bring her boyfriend. We can get to meet him. I have been meaning to ask her for a while but it keeps slipping my mind.”
I turned away from him and put the phone to my ear.
I felt a tap on my shoulder and I turned around again.
“I don’t think you should bother her. She is probably being very secretive about him. She is probably very shy.”
I smiled back.
“I know, but I’m curious. It would be nice if we all went on a double date together and got to know each other. We can just have a casual night out as adults. Nothing too fancy.”
The phone finally connected on the other end and Clarissa’s voice was loud and clear.
“Ms. Erica, good afternoon. Is there a problem?”
I smiled a little. I was actually excited about meeting this man. It would be nice to spend an evening happy for someone else.
“There is no problem, Lorenzo and I wanted to invite you…”