“Now I’m just taking some measurements of the little one.” I try to figure out where the hell on the screen she sees anything that even resembles a baby. I don’t see shit.
Kiara is so focused on the screen that her head cocks to the side and her nose bundles up. She’s also trying to find the baby in the chaos which looks like a TV with a broken signal.
“Okay, Mel, ready for the heartbeat?” She turns a switch and a soft doof-doof-doof sound blares from the machine. She points to a tiny dot that seems to move in rhythm with the sound and suddenly tears spring to my eyes. My baby’s beating heart.
For the first time, the essence that the little bean inside me is actually a living human being, seeps through my clogged mommy-to-be mind. A sudden feeling of attachment clings to my chest, knowing that this new creature is going to play a humongous part in my life from now on, with or without Damion.
Kiara smacks her hand over her mouth – overwhelmed – tears flowing down her cheeks. She looks at me with a huge snotty smile that mirrors mine.
The doctor prints me a picture of the screen, pulls the probe from me, and discards the condom thingy.
“Okay, you get dressed, and then we can talk. I’ll wait for you in the next room,” she says walking through another door.
“Oh, Mel, it’s perfect. Did you hear the little heart?” Kiara stares at the picture, you would swear it’s her baby the way she acts.
“It’s … it’s … ” I can’t get the words out cause my heart is overflowing. I quickly get dressed and we enter the other room – the doctor points for us to sit down.
“Congratulations, Mel, you have a perfect and very strong little baby growing inside you.” I feel so proud. Is this what motherhood feels like? It’s strange, yet exciting and scary.
“According to my calculations, you are about 8 weeks and everything is normal.” I feel a weight lift and even a little excitement starts running through my veins.
“I’m a little bit concerned about your weight. You’ll have to make sure you eat enough and get lots of rest.” She looks at my skinny frame and then at my face. I know she noticed the black rings under my eyes.
“You tell her doc. This girl is getting borderline anorexic.” Now Kiara decides to chirp in. I glare at her and she stares back with stern eyes.
“It’s complicated,” I mumble, not that they would understand what I’m going through. I’m in love with a man who may or may not want a baby with me. And I have a stalker that might do something horrible if he finds out about the baby. And Daddy has a stalker that also might do something terrible if she finds out about the baby.
“Mel, I know I’m no shrink, but I am a baby doctor, and no matter what you’re going through, you have to put the little mongrel inside first. You better eat healthily and regularly and you better sleep, even if you have to force yourself to do so!”
“I can’t seem to keep any food in,” I say.
“I’ll give you something for the morning sickness.” Morning sickness my ass – mine goes on the whole day.
She looks at Kiara “And you, doll, must help look after her. Or get Mr. Complicated to get his butt into the game and do his frickin share.” Kiara looks at me with a determent face and nods her head.
“You hear bitch, enough of this bullshit. You’re going to tell him. He won’t take your shit, that’s for sure,” Kiara scolds. I throw my hands up in the air, I give up.
“Okay, so complicated Daddy, does he have any issues that I should know about?” I frown, confused by the question.
“Oh, he has many …” Kiara smirks.
“He’s cocky, reckless, stubborn, annoying, hyperactive …” I take over listing all my man’s issues. “Sometimes he can be incredibly stupid and a real asshole … but he is intelligent …” I stop in the middle of my charade when the doctor bursts out laughing.
“I was more referring to medical issues in his family that can affect the baby or the pregnancy?” She smiles warmly after her outburst.
“I don’t know. He seems very healthy.” I look at Kiara for help, but she just pulls up her shoulders.
“VERY healthy.” She wiggles her eyebrows at the doctor. “Great abs, cute butt, sexy eyes, sporty and fit … with working sperm. Yep, very healthy indeed.” The doctor pulls her eyes and laughs out loud again.
“Okay, just stop. You guys are killing me and now I for sure need to meet this dude.” Her brown eyes gleam but then she continues more seriously, “It is good to know the history from both sides to make sure we cover our grounds.” She pulls her lips into a thin line. “I could always just secretly peek at HIS daddy’s file,” she winks. “And I think he might also have one with us.” I know she’s figured it out.
“But don’t worry, no one will know … I’m going to write ‘complicated’.”
Complicated badboy, complicated fame, complicated relationship, complicated past, complicated stalkers, complicated brothers, complicated baby – all leading to an even more complicated ending.
“I’m going to prescribe some vitamins you have to start taking right away.” She hands me a bunch of papers. “And take these pamphlets. Everything you must avoid from now on and some stuff you’ll need to know. Please read them. Do you have any questions or concerns?”
Yep, doc, I have lots. How do I tell a guy, who’s my boyfriend, that he’s going to be a father? How do I tell my overprotective family and keep them from killing said father? How do I keep this baby safe from psycho-maniacs who want both my father and my baby’s father dead?
But instead, I opt for an easier question.
“Um, will it hurt the baby if I exercise?” I have to keep my life as normal as possible and running always clears my head.
“Nope, exercise is good, just don’t overdo it and avoid physical contact and extreme sports.”
“And before you ask, sex is excellent for the baby, so go for it. You will start to crave it actually, but that is normal with all the hormonal changes, so just enjoy it.” I can literally feel the blood shooting to my face and Kiara rolls her eyes saying, “As if they need encouragement.”
“I would love the sound of you shutting up now,” I hiss at Kiara but she just gives me her I’m-not-scared-of-you face and continues softly, “Just saying that you two humping like rabbits is exactly how this little beanie was created.”
She shrugs her shoulders and suddenly I can’t think of one reason I’m friends with her.
“I will keep this file in a safe place … not even my receptionist will know. I will hand her a fake file. So if anyone looks into your medical history for some reason, they will find out I’m your doctor,” she says. “But they will not see anything about the bean.”
“I understand. Thank you so much.”
“Okay, then I’ll see you in about 2 weeks, hopefully with the daddy-to-be. Just tell him and get it over with, stress is not good for your baby.” I get up and smile at her. Maybe she’s right. Maybe I’m overthinking the whole thing. I’m going to tell Damion and then we can sort it out together.
We walk through the hospital on our way to the car, still teary-eyed and heart-filled, looking at the sonar pic.
“So, are you going to tell him?” Kiara stops and pulls me to the side of the corridor.
“Ug, I don’t know. He is not ready to be a dad.”
“Like you are not ready to be a mom. But you’re figuring it out. So will he.” Yeah.
“So just tell that hunky biker already!”
“What must she tell me?”