“Your boyfriend is looking for you.” I look at her feeling the tiny bit of jealousy settling in my gut.
“I don’t have a boyfriend,” she answers rather quickly.
I snort, my face a little unpleasant, “Okay, your ex then.”
“Stupid fucker,” Ilkay backs me up. She sighs deeply and bites down on her bottom lip, then she gets up and walks out to the pool area.
“Can’t we just give them some money and tell them to fuck off? It’s not as if we had anything to do with what happened.” Ilkay goes back to the main topic as if the whole telephone conversation didn’t even happen.
“We tried, he’s not in it for the money. But we have a plan …” Again Uncle John looks at Jackson. “I’ll let you know as soon as it’s finalized.”
Nobody says a word, each one preoccupied with their own personal thoughts, just quietly drinking their coffee. I’m itching to go after Mel. She’s out there somewhere in the dark, in the rain, in the cold. But I need to stay put. I can’t however stop from shaking my leg.
Mom peers at me and catching on to my restlessness, she gets up.
“I think it’s time to call it a night,” she takes the empty cups and places them on the tray.
“Yeah, I need to go too,” Uncle John says, “It’s way past an old man’s bedtime.” He laughs and hugs my mom.
“I’ll go get Mel,” Jackson says, “I’ll meet you outside so we can drive together.”
“Wait,” Mom says. “I think Mel is rather upset.” Go, Mom.
“I’m going to help Damion clean here and then I will take her with me. I think she needs a little motherly love and to talk to a woman. Don’t you think?”
“I think that would be great for her,” Ilkay says. Then they all leave. I watch the red lights of their cars disappear into the darkness … thank goodness.
When I get back inside I hear soft voices coming from the lounge. I slide down against the wall, not to eavesdrop, but not to disturb them. It’s not my fault the walls are so thin I can hear every word.
“Mel, I know it’s none of my business, but as a mom, I need to know … how do you really feel about my son?” Oh, I love how Mom asks all the right questions.
There’s a long pause and I wish I could see her face.
“He’s a player … ” she says timidly but truthfully.
“True,” Mom says, and my heart falls. Whose side is Mom on here?
“Unlike us girls, boys aren’t born very smart.” Really Mom. At least she’s making Mel laugh.
“And they are ruled by their dicks. So they screw around until, eventually, they get enough smarts to realize what they want.” I hold my breath. This is actually deep.
“Mel, Damion hides his true self in the shadows of his past and I’m scared that he’ll get stuck there. Did you know that he has ‘rules’ to keep his life under control?”
“No.” Her voice is thick as if she’s been crying. “He doesn’t look like the kind of man to follow the rules.”
“He can be a little wild … and he sure is a lot to handle.” Mom’s chuckle makes me smile. “See these gray hairs … that’s all him.” I roll my eyes. I’m not that bad. “And Luke.”
“Well, to tell you the truth, I’m confused. I really really want to hate him, and I do -” Not exactly what I want to hear. “But I also don’t think I do.” Now that is confusing.
“Can I give you some advice?” Yeah, Mom, tell her to date your son.
“When you come to any crossroads in your life, the best thing is to listen to your heart.” Great advice Haley Grimm. She just said she hates me.
“Ignore your body, it works on animalistic instinct, and can’t think. Oh, and your mind … bypass that cause it tends to think a bit too much. But the heart … it always knows the true path. So when in doubt … listen to your heart, doll.”
There’s a moment of silence and I get up and walk into the room, finding them hugged in each other’s arms. Mom’s eyes find mine over Mel’s shoulder, clearly telling me that it’s all up to me now. I wink at her and watch her lips curl into that wonderful warm smile I love to bits and know so well. I fucking love my mother.
“I have to go, but I want you to know … if you ever need to talk, I’ll be glad to listen.” She lets Mel go and gets up.
“And just a last piece of advice … sometimes badboys can have wings … if you look close enough.”
“Even the devil?” Mel asks teasingly, her eyes playing the coquette with me. Mocking me.
I laugh. She does that a lot, this stubborn, snarky, razor-tongued, angel – make me laugh.
As well as spook me.
I am used to it. Hell, I even like it.
“Well, my dear, even the devil was an angel once,” Mom chuckles softly.
She hugs me, tight, with a knowing smile, and then she’s gone.
Mel cast those azure eyes up at me. I can get lost in there for hours. It’s the best part of all her perfect parts, expressing so many feelings. Emotions that make me feel alive.
“So, Damion,” she smiles, “Why am I here?” We need to talk, I’m aware of that. But I first need to find the words.
“I think we should shower first – ”
“Together?” She interrupts with popped eyes. That would be fucking great.
“Later maybe. But no, I’ll go first.” I run up the stairs. I take out a T-shirt and tracksuit pants – lay them all on the bed. Then I jump into the shower.
The warm water relaxes me as I soap my body, thinking that this is it. This is the moment I’ve been waiting for. She’s here, in my house, about to sleep in my bed. There’s no turning back after this.
And I’m ready.
I rub soap on my hands and run it down my shaft, pulling and scrubbing my dick clean, then my balls. I let it hang, working my hand between my legs to help the water rinse off the soap. I put my hands against the tiles and lower my head, standing under the running water for just a moment longer, gathering control for what’s to come. Cause, fuck, I’m going to need every little bit of it I can grip.