With that she stood up, shook our hands, and then opened the door. She walked out to the receptionist, and asked her to schedule me for three times a week for the next month.
After we left, I went home feeling a little better. At least my health was on the mend, unlike my marriage. Thankfully I hadn’t thought about my problems at home the whole time I was in with the doctor.
We got home, and I got settled in at the house. I was reading over the pamphlet and was pretty sure I could do most of these things, so I found a few that I could do while sitting in bed. I started with my legs, with some simple leg lifts and knee bends. I was at it for a few minutes, but got sore pretty quickly. I did the same types of exercise meant for the arms until they, too, were screaming to my brain in pain.
After, I lay down and took a nap. After a while, mom came in to let me know she was taking off and the kids should be home pretty soon. I just nodded and went back to sleep. I woke up later to the sound of the phone ringing, and my daughter answered it.
I guess it was Jenn, because at the end of the call she yelled that she hated her and slammed down the phone. I would need to talk with my daughter about her anger, even if I, too, felt the same right now.
She came in to check on me, and then went out to the kitchen to make some food. She wasn’t an executive chef yet, but she knew how to cook a lot more than I ever knew. She told me she learned from cooking channel shows and from mom.
She helped me into the chair at our dining room table, and then went to finish up dinner. I asked the boys if they needed any help with their homework, but they said that Sidney already helped them with it.
That brought a tear to my eye. My little girl had to grow up too quickly because of all this, and it hurt that I couldn’t do much about it. The kids all sat at the table, and we ate a very nice hamburger casserole that Sidney had made.
The conversation was light, but I think we all needed that right then. Steven mentioned that he got into trouble at school, but nothing major. He said his second period math teacher gave him a warning for talking during a test. Tommy said he had tryouts for the baseball team coming up the week after spring break. Sidney just asked how I was doing and how therapy went.
“Guys, it sounds like I will still be out of it and needing help for a while. The good news is that I hope to be up and walking around without help soon. As for everything going on around here at the house, all I can tell you is that we will take things one day at a time.”
“Well dad, you have our support. You can count on us.” Sidney said with a smile.
“Thanks hon, that means a lot, really. Ok, let’s clean up this mess, well could you guys? Then maybe we could watch a movie on-demand?” I asked.
They all stood up and started clearing the table. I was so proud of them at that moment. If there was anything to get me through this, it would be them. After they cleaned up, they helped me get comfortable on the recliner, and we all sat and watched a new action movie about an earthquake that had just come out.
After the movie, Sidney helped me get to my room, turned around while I got into PJ’s, and then helped me to the bathroom again. Thank god she didn’t seem too embarrassed, because I sure was. I slept ok that night, but still had a lot of unresolved thoughts circling around in my head.
For the rest of the week it was pretty much the same. Jenn came by twice to spend some time with the kids, and you could tell she wanted to talk with me, but there just wasn’t much to say right then. I did tell her that perhaps we should try talking sometime soon, but to be honest, I was dreading it. Mom got me to my therapy appointments, and that hot doctor worked my ass off. I hurt so badly, but she said I was making great progress.
That weekend when Jenn came by, she took the boys out to a nice lunch and some shopping. Sidney said she didn’t feel like going with, and I could tell that it hurt Jenn. Part of me felt really good about that, and part of me now just felt sad. She was learning the price of her weakness. I still had to figure out what I was going to do about my asshole ex-friend, but wanted to get better first before handling him.
After Jenn brought the kids back, she asked if we could talk. The kids went outside for a bit to give us a chance to talk. Sidney asked one last time if I was ok, then said she would be back to check on me. She was going to make a great mom someday.
“Matt, I miss you so much. You have to know that, and that I love you so much.”
“Jenn, do you think I don’t miss you too? We were supposed to grow old together. We were so good together, and I thought you would be by my side forever. Where did I go wrong?”
“You didn’t Matt, god! How could you think this was your fault?”
“I just don’t understand. Was Jim that good or …”
“No, HELL NO!” she interrupted me. “Sorry, just you are the only man I have ever loved. You are the only man I ever want to be with, and I am so ashamed that I let him make me question myself.” She paused for a minute, so I just waited her out. “Matt I am going to be completely honest with you, and hope that you believe me. Jim stopped by the hospital again, and I told him to leave me alone or I would call the cops on him.”
“What did he want from you, another good fucking?” I said with some spite. Just hearing his name made my stomach churn.
“He made it sound like he has been in love with me for a long time, and was hoping I felt the same. I told him to go to hell, and never come near me again. I just wanted you to know.”
Another pause, and then she started talking again. “What about us, Matt? Is there a chance for you and me? Do you think we could talk to a counselor or something? I am at the end of my rope here, and have no idea how to live without you.”
I was starting to get a little pissed off at her, and seriously wanted to kill Jim now. “Jenn, if you want to go see a counselor, then go for it. It might help you sort out why you let another man put his dick in you. As for me going, I will think about it. It might help me out, but then again it could just be a waste of time. As for Jim, if you see him again you tell him that I am going to fucking kill him if he doesn’t leave you the hell alone.”
I half expected her to start crying right then. She was getting better about it, but she had always been a very wet-eyed woman. She did have some tears, but wasn’t bawling. My rage didn’t last too long, so I figured we better wrap this up.
“If you set something up, I will try it out, OK?”
She looked up with a little hope. “OK, honey.” She grabbed her purse, turned to me as she was walking out the door and said, “I love you, bye.” I heard her get in her car and drive off, as the kids came back in the house.
“So dad, when is mom going to be coming home?” asked Tommy.
“I am not sure guys, but we might be going to see a counselor, to see if that helps. I just don’t know,” I said.