JOAN’S POV
I sat on my bed, taking a look around my room. It was funny how much my life had changed in a few months. It’s funny how things can change in the blink of an eye.
The room was lavish, yet suffocating, and I often found myself feeling lost within its walls. Especially when the man I was supposed to call my fiance kept himself as distant as a stranger.
But that was the role I’d signed up for, wasn’t it? Pretend to be the girlfriend of America’s most eligible billionaire and make it look convincing.
Only, Derrick didn’t make it easy. Not in the slightest.
Today had been an exhausting whirl of decisions. Dresses, flowers, venues-it has taken me the whole day. I’d met up with the finest wedding dress designers and the best florists in the country.
Irene had been by my side. She had been supportive as always. Her cheerful attitude helped to keep me grounded. She was good at calming my nerves, and I needed that because Derrick’s frosty demeanor had left me feeling colder than I wanted to admit. And Bea, well, she was just a phone call away, always reminding me that this was temporary, that I needed the money, and that I could get through this.
Yet every time I looked at Derrick, my heart clenched in ways I couldn’t explain. He was my contract partner, yet something deeper inside me wanted him to be more. I couldn’t help myself; I’d catch glimpses of him and his handsome profile. His gaze was always far away as though his mind was somewhere I couldn’t reach. Sometimes, I’d try to talk to him, offer a light comment or a gentle smile, but he’d only look at me with those cold piercing eyes of him and remind me of our arrangement.
“Don’t get carried away, Joan. This is business, nothing more,” he’d say, and each time, it felt like a knife twisting in my chest.
But tonight… tonight felt different.
I’d been walking down the hall, just trying to clear my head, when I heard voices. My curiosity got the better of me. I slipped into the shadows near the doorway and saw Derrick, standing with his right hand men, Santi and Ace. I was too far away to make out everything, but phrases floated over to me, the words “mafia,” “Godfathers,” and “pressure.” My heartbeat quickened, and my stomach twisted. Was Derrick really involved with… that? The mafia really existed?
The reality hit me like a wave, almost knocking the breath out of me. Derrick was more dangerous than I’d ever realized. I wanted to walk away, but I couldn’t tear my gaze from him. He looked… tired. His usual confident composure was cracked, just slightly. His shoulders were sagged and his brow was furrowed. There was something vulnerable about him in that moment that made my chest ache.
Ace spoke up “They’re pushing hard, boss. They want reassurance. You know what they’re capable of. The godfathers have been getting impatient lately”
“I know.” Derrick’s tone was sharp, though it faltered for a moment. “But I won’t be pushed into a corner. Not by them, not by anyone.”
It was surreal to hear him talk like this. He was always so controlled, so impenetrable. And now, this glimpse behind the curtain showed just how much pressure he was under. I wanted to go to him, to put a hand on his shoulder and tell him it would be okay. But I didn’t dare.
“You’re putting everything on the line for this,” Santi said “The marriage, the deal with the council-are you sure about all of this? We can’t afford to make any mistakes. They’re watching closely and they can’t know that this is all fake. If they do, it’s over”
Derrick took a long breath. “I have no choice. It’s the only way to secure our position. And if Joan… if she can play her part right, then maybe we can pull this off.”
His words stung. His words were a reminder that to him, I was just a pawn. Yet the pain I saw in his eyes betrayed something deeper. Something conflicted.
As their conversation ended, Derrick turned to walk away. I stepped back instantly. My breath caught in my throat, hoping he wouldn’t see me. But he didn’t. I pressed my hand against the wall. My heart was heavy, torn between anger and empathy.
Part of me wanted to confront him, to demand answers, to make him see me as more than just a convenient role. Also, I wanted to know more about this mafia thing. I wanted to fully know what I was getting myself into. And another part wanted to wrap my arms around him, hold him, and let him know he wasn’t alone in this.
But I couldn’t. Not while he kept his walls up so high.
I waited until they were gone, then leaned against the wall, feeling more exhausted than I’d felt all day. When I made my way back to my room, Bea was calling again, and I picked up, needing the familiarity of her voice.
“Hey Bea” I said.
“Hey babe. You sound off. Is everything okay?”
I forced a smile, even though she couldn’t see it. “It’s… complicated. There’s just so much more to all of this than I thought.”
“You’re in deep, aren’t you?” she said, her voice softening. “Look, just remember why you’re there. The money, the chance to build a new life. Don’t let yourself get too attached to him.”
I wanted to protest, to say that I wasn’t getting attached, but the words caught in my throat. I was attached, whether I wanted to be or not. Derrick had a way of sneaking into my thoughts, into my heart, and no amount of reasoning seemed to make it stop.
“Thanks, Bea,” I murmured. “I needed to hear that.”
I ended the call, trying to shake off the conversation I’d overheard. But the image of Derrick, exhausted and vulnerable, lingered in my mind, and I knew that tonight, sleep wouldn’t come easily.