45

Eros
The gunshots pop like a mountain cracking in half. I’d know the sound of semi-automatic rifle fire anywhere. A horrified chill runs down my spine, and I’m running down the stairs in a shirt and slacks, my cuffs unbuttoned, a gun clutched in my hands, roaring for my soldiers.
My heart’s racing in my chest. I can barely see straight. I keep thinking about Cara, my Cara, my wife. She ran out of the house and I let her go, thinking she needed space. Why the fuck was I so foolish?
Lycus appears at my side, looking white. “Eros,” he says.
“Where was that?” I grab him by the collar and yank him close, growling in his face. “Where is my wife?”
“It was the front gate,” Lycus says, pushing me away. “The guards out front radioed up a second before the gunfire. They have her.”
My heart stops. My guts twist. I stare at him, not breathing. “They have who?”
“Cara. She was with the guards when the attack started. Eros-”
I storm past him, sprinting out the front door. My vision tunnels. All I can think is Cara, Cara, I have to get to Cara. Someone shouts and my soldiers follow, but I’m running as hard as I can, my mind firmly on my wife.
No, no, this can’t be happening, an attack on my own fucking house?
The moment she walked away?
They must’ve been watching. Someone was assigned to keep tabs on our front gate, and when she stormed off, they must’ve called in to the Pavone bosses.
Who approved a fucking hit on my front doorstep?
I’m breathing hard as the guard house comes into view. The destruction is immediately apparent: three bodies lay on the ground, stretched out and drenched in blood, riddled with bullets. Three of my men, three of my people. I don’t have time for them though. I jump the gate, climbing over it like a madman, and drop down on the other side in a tumble. I scramble to my feet, looking around wildly.
The cars are gone. The shooters drove off. I don’t care about them. I don’t care about anything.
She has to be here. She has to be okay.
“Cara!” I shout into the deep, horrible silence, broken only by the groan of a guard that’s still half-alive. “Cara! Where are you!”
My soldiers appear with Lycus. The gate rolls back as I storm around, looking for her, seeing red. They tried to kill her, my wife, my Cara. They tried to kill her onmy property, in front of my own damn home.
“Cara!”
“Here.” A small voice. A small sound. It barely breaks the surface of my rage. I run to the guard house and find her curled up on the floor, staring at me with wide, terrified eyes.
Holes are punched in the walls around her. Holes inches above her head.
“Fuck,” I snarl and drop to my knees at her side. “Cara, are you okay? Are you hurt?” I pull her into my arms, holding her tight and checking her over for wounds. There’s no blood, no injury I can see.
“I’m okay,” she whispers, blinking rapidly. “I’m fine. I was in the guard house, and when the shooting started, I dropped down-” She chokes like she’s trying not to cry.
I hug her tight as my men fan out, holding her to my chest like I’m ready to put my body between her and the bullets that tried to end her life. I realize I’d do it too-I’d throw myself in front of danger for her. I’d die for her, just to give her another ten minutes of breath.
Some of the soldiers try to save the dying guards, but I can’t pay attention to that. Lycus says something and I bark at him like a wolf, which makes him back off.
There’s only Cara now and her safety.
I stand and carry her back to the house, clutching her in my arms.
“I can walk,” she whispers as I burst in through the door.
“Quiet,” I say, climbing the stairs two at a time. “Don’t talk.”
“Eros, really-”
But I’m not paying attention. I bring her to our room and put her into bed, touching her face, her chest, her legs and arms to make sure there aren’t any wounds I missed. “I’ll call Dr. Kalivas. He’ll come to make sure-”
“Eros!”
Her hard tone snaps me out of battle mode. When I get like this, there is only the mission ahead of me-the rest of the world disappears.
Cara is my mission.
But she’s sitting up and touching my face.
“Cara.” I clutch her tightly against me. “God, I thought you were hurt. I thought you might be dead.”
“I’m fine,” she whispers. “It’s okay, I’m okay, really.”
“That was too close.” I breathe the smell of her hair and catch a whiff of gunpowder. My heart sinks into my guts. “I won’t let you out of my sight again. I will stay here, in this room with you-”
“Eros.” Her tone is hard. “Stop it.”
“I mean it, asteraki mu, nobody will get near you. The Italians will bleed for this, they will burn-”
“Eros.” She squirms from my grip and stares into my eyes. She strokes my cheek, shaking her head. “Please listen to me.”
My jaw works. What is there to talk about? They tried to kill my wife on my own property. They murdered three of my guards in front of my own house. They disrespected me so deeply, I cannot allow this to stand.
All I want to do is get out there in the street with my guns and my killers. I want to slaughter my enemies, hunt them all down and make it slow, but the pain in her voice keeps me here. The fear of losing her keeps me in this room.
“I know you’re angry with me, but I will not fail you, Cara.”
“It’s not about that.” She lets out a low sigh. “It’s the war. How many more people will die because of me?”
“As many as it takes until the Italians are finished.”
“But what about you? What about your people? I don’t want to see them hurt. Those men-” She clears her throat, trying not to cry. “They were alive one second. And the next, they’re gone. All because I was there.”
“That is not on you,” I say firmly. “That is on the Pavone Famiglia, those cowardly scum.”
“I know that,” she says. “But how do we stop it?”
“We make you my wife.” I stand and pace across the room. “I will call Gareth once the grounds have been secured. I’ll instruct him to bribe a judge. Any amount at all.”
“Eros-” she starts but I turn on her.
“No more fucking games, Cara. No more back and forth, no more uncertainty, no more roadblocks.” I stride to the bed then kneel beside her. “I will do whatever it takes to make you my wife. I will protect you. I will kill our enemies. I will end this war for good.”
She stares into my eyes. I want her to say she believes me. I want her to kiss me, pull me close, let me breathe in her smell, taste her lips, feel her warmth. Instead, she lets out a long breath.
“And then what?” she asks, blinking back tears. “Gareth files the paperwork. Then what? You keep killing the Pavones? They keep killing your people in return? And what about us, do we keep acting like we’re really man and wife, when we both know this wasn’t meant to be forever? I don’t know what to do anymore, Eros, this has gone so far. You kept things from me and I can’t forgive that.”
“I won’t ask you to, but I will earn your trust again.” I feel as though my chest is cracking open. I want her to see my heart beat for her, to make her understand that I’m as open as I can be, that I am as much hers as I’m capable of being.
She shakes her head slowly and looks away. The tension grows between us. I want to snap it like the bones of my enemies but I hold the silence. I deserve the silence.
I should’ve told her about the delay from the start. If I had done that, none of this ever would’ve happened.
“Those men that died,” she says and glances at me. “Who were they?”
“I’m not sure who was on duty. I didn’t get a good look.”
“Can you do something for them? For their families, I mean?”
I nod slowly, pride blossoming in my heart. Despite coming so close to death, she’s still a kind person.
“I’ll make sure they’re taken care of.”
“Thank you.” She pulls her knees to her chest, hugging herself. “I don’t want to be alone, but I’m afraid if I ask you to stay, you’ll get the wrong idea.”
My hands tighten. “I will stay.”
“It’s fake, Eros. We can’t lose sight of that. It’s all fake.”
My anger drains away. She looks so small and vulnerable, holding onto herself like she’s going to drift away if she doesn’t. I climb into bed, wrap my arm around her shoulders and pull her close.
“I’ll stay right here as long as you need me,” I whisper as she leans her head on my shoulder, tears making her chest shake. “Real or fake, I’m here.”