Parking outside the house I’d once grown up in, Natalie skipped towards the front door, knocking loudly. I could feel how nervous Cindy was, her hand gripping mine tightly. My father answered the door, immediately scooping up my daughter and tickling her as he noticed me approach with Cindy. He figured out who she was rather quickly, introducing himself and asking us to follow him inside.
“My father’s name is Gary,” I said, “Mum is Sophie. Brother is James. Sister is Jane. Partners, nieces and nephews will be introduced, or happily introduce themselves.”
Mum was pleased to see me as always, giving me a hug, before I introduced Cindy to my parents. Dad hugged her immediately, Mum a little cooler. I expected that. She had adored Megan, but since she’d broken my heart, I knew she was always going to be a little suspicious. Not saying Mum wasn’t friendly, she was, but… you know how mothers can be sometimes.
The rest of the family was outside, James with his wife, Rebecca, Jane with her husband, Will. Introductions were made again, my brother joking that I was a cradle snatcher as Cindy was obviously younger than me by a few years. Dad made sure I had a beer in hand rather quickly, Cindy a glass of wine, Natalie already off playing with her cousins, so she’d be fine for the rest of the day.
Dad, James, Will and I hovered around the barbecue once the old man fired it up, sipping at our beer, chatting shit as always. I kept an eye on Cindy, who was already deep in conversation with my mother, sister-in law and sister. My sister seemed to love her already, and despite the cool greeting, Mum was warming to her quickly too.
“So… this is serious?” my father finally asked.
“Pretty much moved in with her already.”
“Where’d you meet?” James asked.
“A pub nearer the city. She actually approached me. Said I was handsome but looked lonely. It was my first real night out since the divorce. Stars must have aligned that night.”
“Well, it’s been over a year since your divorce. Guess it was time to move on, right?” Dad stated.
“True. I was too busy wallowing in self-pity.”
The adults sat at the large table as we ate lunch, the children at a smaller table. Cindy sat close to me, her hand resting on my thigh, almost being overly affectionate at times. I didn’t mind whatsoever as we were not full on snogging in front of the parents, but I knew it was her way of dealing with the nerves. Once lunch was finished and we were tucking into dessert, Cindy cleared her throat.
“I’ve loved meeting all of you, but before we all get comfortable with each other, I feel I have something to tell. Mark loves me for who I am and I can only hope that, as we get serious with each other, that you will at least accept me for who I am too.” She shuffled closer, so I wrapped an arm around her waist, feeling her hand grip mine tightly. “Mark and I met in a club in the city. You know Mike and Chris, his friends?” Everyone around the table nodded. They’d known them almost as long as I had. “I’m a woman but I wasn’t born a woman. I’m transgender.”
There was silence for a few seconds before my brother simply said, “Cool!” He leaned across the table and bumped my shoulder with his fist, giving me a nod of approval.
“You’ve got to give me hair tips,” my sister added, “I just love your hair. It’s so vibrant!”
My father cleared his throat and extended a hand. Cindy offered hers in return. “Welcome to the family, Cindy. Mark, you mess this up, and I’ll have your balls. It’s obvious to everyone around this table how much this little lady loves you already.”
I looked at Mum, who smiled at us. “So when’s he going to pop the question because it’s obvious to everyone here, right?” she asked.
Cindy turned and buried her head into my shoulder, silently sobbing. I rubbed her back, my sister caressing her shoulder at the same time. “Her own father…” I said. I didn’t need to add anything else. Three words was more than enough for them to understand what it meant to her. Hell, it nearly got me going. I loved my family, and I knew it was never going to be an issue.
“Does Megan know?” my father wondered.
“She does. To my surprise, they get on rather well. It’s good. Our relationship is a little better too.”
We had to leave by mid-afternoon to take Natalie home. Cindy found herself hugged by everyone. My mother’s embrace upon leaving was beautiful to see, treating her like a daughter already. My father did the same thing, almost demanding that I bring her around more often. I suggested we get the two families together sooner rather than later. Natalie understood what we’d done, exclaiming to everyone how much she loved Cindy and that she’d be her second mummy soon enough. I had to pretty much drag Cindy and Natalie to my car, otherwise I’d turn into a blubbering wreck.
Pulling up outside my old house, Natalie got out and headed towards the front door. I turned to Cindy, meeting her eyes. “Best day of my life was meeting you, Mark Pritchard. Every day since then is proving to be the equal best.”
“I can only hope I can make every day going forward just as good then, if not even better.”
Megan greeted us with a smile, which was still something I was getting used to. Asking us if we wanted to stay for dinner was still a surprise, but Cindy and I accepted it. Gave us an excuse to spend more time with Natalie, Greg arriving home a couple of hours later, joining us at the dinner table as Megan worked away in the kitchen.
Cindy and I stayed around long enough to put Natalie to bed, while Greg disappeared to go play his video games. Sitting in the living room with Megan, she shared a bottle of wine with Cindy while I sipped at a beer, aware I had to drive.
“Cindy, can I ask a question?”
“Sure.”
“How do you rate him in bed?”
I almost spat my beer everywhere. “He’s fantastic.”
Megan smiled, almost wistfully. “It was never the bedroom I had an issue.”
“Then why did you cheat?” I asked. It was harsh. It had to be. Megan obviously got upset, so I moved across the couch, patting the empty space between Cindy and I. I think she appreciated that, sitting down as Cindy caressed her shoulder. “Megan, I’m past hating you. I’m past being bitter. Things are better now, but that the one question I still have. I wasn’t a perfect husband, I made mistakes, but I must have done something…”
“You did nothing wrong,” Megan whispered, wiping her cheeks, “I was bored. You had your job that you’ve excelled at all your life, our kids, your life in general. I was part of it but… I felt I wasn’t at the same time. The sex was always amazing, our relationship was good, you did your best to make me feel special, but… I don’t know, I felt like something was missing. Having an affair was exciting, illicit… It was just for me. I didn’t even really like him, to be honest. Was the sex worth it? Not really, it was only worth it because it felt so naughty. I felt… alive, Mark. For the first time in years, I felt like someone other than a wife, worker drone, mother. I know that makes me sound horrible. I was horrible. I should have talked to you, suggested counselling, something… anything to make it better between us.” She met my eyes. “But I never stopped loving you. I thought I could stop eventually, but it was just the excitement that kept me going. Then you found out, and I saw what it did to you, to us…” She looked at Cindy. “I look at what you two share now and just feel empty. This is what we used to have. Mark kept putting in effort until it just didn’t seem to work. No wonder he grew disheartened. A marriage takes two people, takes constant work, but I didn’t help at all.”
“We all make mistakes, Megan,” Cindy stated.
“I didn’t make a mistake, Cindy. An affair is much more than just a mistake.” She turned back towards me, taking my hands in hers. “Please forgive me, Mark. I’m begging you. I know there’s nothing…”
I kissed her forehead. “I forgive you, Megan. I think I did long ago.” She broke like a dam as she collapsed against me. Cindy smiled at me as she hugged her from behind. Despite the fact she sobbed against me, I felt good, like a weight was lifted from my chest. I now had a better understanding, which made me feel at least a little better. That would always weight heavily in the background, but I could forgive and eventually forget.
“She’s changed you,” Megan finally whispered, “For the better, I might add. I’m sorry, Mark. I’m so, so sorry.”
“What’s done is done, Megan. But… I’m willing to work on our new relationship. Meet me halfway, and we’ll get there. You might be my ex-wife but there’s no reason why we can’t be friends.”
“I’ll be your friend too,” Cindy added sweetly. Megan turned and hugged her just as tightly.
Megan eventually sat back, wiping her cheeks. “Jesus, I haven’t cried like that in a while.”
“Feel better?” Cindy asked.
“Confession of my sins. You were a great husband and father, Mark. I’m the one that threw our marriage away.”
We talked about inconsequential shit for another half an hour or so before we needed to leave as it was back to work the next morning. Megan and Cindy shared a warm hug before the ex-wife hugged me. I was getting used to that again. The affection had slowly died during our marriage. “Just so you know, Mark, I approve of her,” she said softly, “Got yourself one hell of a woman there.”
“I know.”
“Did she tell you?”
“Of course.”
“I’m sure the feelings will fade eventually.”