92

[REBECCA]
Artemy paused for what felt like the longest time, leaving the words hanging around us, our eyes connected together. We breathed together, our heart racing in unison.
Another tear spilled from my eye and ran down my cheek. Artemy caught it quickly with his lips, kissing it away. When another fell down my face, he did the same thing. Closing my eyes, I hiccupped back a sob.
“That little boy was me, Rebecca,” Artemy whispered in my ear, his breath tickling me there. “And the broken girl he found under his bed, his Angel, she is you. You are my Angel.”
“I-” I started but then quickly snapped my mouth shut. I didn’t know what to say. His confession had truly left me with a mix of emotions.
I felt light, almost as if I was floating. My heart was beating as fast as the wings of a hummingbird, and it hummed just like a hummingbird. It sang with happiness and so much…love. I was filled with pure elation.
Artemy’s lips lingered on my cheeks before he slightly pulled away, looking down at me with his beautiful blue eyes. His expression was soft yet determined. “You are right. I did touch Tiffany.”
I blinked away tears, my fingers digging into his shoulders painfully. He didn’t wince, not that I expected him to.
He instantly noticed my change in demeanor. He soothed me, caressing my cheeks yet again. “I touched her, but I didn’t kiss her. I touched her, but I didn’t fuck her. I didn’t do anything with Tiffany.”
I only blinked up at him, confused and feeling slightly bewildered. “I’ll be blunt and honest. Yes, I was so close to fucking her. Yes, I had ripped her panties and had her bent over my desk, but no, I didn’t fuck her. I couldn’t, Rebecca. You were all I could think about. You. Every single minute. All I could see were your eyes, beautiful smiles, serene expression as you played the piano and walked to the creek. All I could hear were your laughter and sweet voice.”
Artemy dragged in a harsh, deep breath before releasing it with a tired sigh. His expression was haggard, his voice filled with uncertainty and so much grief that my heart ached. It ached for his pain. “I was mad. At my father and at everything. My feelings. My weakness for you. And I was so scared. My mother died because my father loved her. An angel living in the world of the devils, and in the end, she got killed because of it. I am so fucking scared that I’ll lose you too. The mere thought of losing you drives me insane.”
“I didn’t do anything with Tiffany,” he said again, his voice almost filled with ferocity as he willed me to believe him with his eyes. They begged me to see the truth. “Tell me you believe me, Rebecca.”
My hands left his shoulders, but instead of pulling away, I palmed his cheeks. “I believe you,” I whispered.
I truly did. His words and face spoke honesty. It was right there for me to believe. Not once was I filled with doubt when he said he didn’t touch Tiffany. If I had doubts before, it was now erased.
“I believe you, Artemy,” I said again, my fingers pressing gently into his cheeks. Artemy shuddered in relief atop of me, his eyes closing as he finally relaxed in my hold.
We stayed like that for a few seconds, with me soothing him. When he opened his eyes again, this time the blueish orbs were glistening with intensity. “The plan was to get close to you to find out if you were a traitor,” he started.
Flinching, I started to let go, but he quickly grasped my hands, holding them firmly to his cheeks.
“But it was just an excuse,” he quickly added. “I was using it as an excuse to get close to you. From the very first time I saw you, I had this urge to be close to you. To hold you. But it was a show of weakness. So I tried to find every excuse to get close to you. The plan ended the same day it was made, because no matter what, I couldn’t lie to myself. I kept telling myself it was what I had to do for the safety of everyone, but deep inside, I knew I was doing it for myself. I needed you, since the very beginning.” He looked in her eyes.
“I messed up,” Artemy breathed sadly. “I know I did, but I’m asking you to forgive me. To give me another chance to prove myself. Please let me in your heart again. Give me this chance and I’ll never let you go again. I’ll never break you again.”
He paused and took a deep breath before continuing in the same soft voice. “I’ll never be the man you deserve, but I’ll be the man you need. I’ll be the man who makes you laugh and smile, the one who drives away all your nightmares, the one who kisses you good morning and good night and so many kisses in between. I’ll be your savior. Now and for the rest of my life.”
Tears sprung in my eyes at his confession, and I gave him a wobbly smile. “You definitely do have a way with words,” I replied.
Artemy let out a small laugh and shook his head, his lips lifting up in a small smile. “Only for you, Angel.”
My eyes widened as he called me Angel, the tears falling before I could stop them. “You are making me cry,” I muttered as Artemy swiped the tears away.
“Are they happy tears?” he asked, looking a bit uncertain.
I nodded, speechless, and he gifted me with one of his breathtaking smiles. “Good. From now on, the only tears you will cry will be happy tears.”
“You’re sweet.”
Artemy looked affronted by my admission and sent me a mock glare. I couldn’t help but laugh. It looked like the Mafia Boss didn’t like being called sweet, although he really was…sweet.
“I’m a killer, Rebecca. Definitely not sweet,” he said, looking deep into my eyes.
Smiling, I leaned up and placed a kiss on his nose like he had done to me. “You might be a killer out there, a monster, as you said, but in here,” I pressed my hand over his heart, “in here, you are sweet. To me, you are sweet.”
Another breathtaking smile from Artemy. This time the smile lit up his face and eyes with such happiness that it made my heart ache…in a good way. It fluttered, and I melted into his embrace.
Finally, the pain that I had seen before was no longer there. He looked hopeful.
Taking a deep breath, Artemy continued. “When I’m with you, it feels as if I can finally breathe. I have been living in the darkness for so long, but you bring me light and peace. You make me laugh and smile, something I haven’t done in so damn long. When I’m away from you, I feel empty, like I’m missing a piece of myself. I don’t ever want to be without you, Angel. I don’t think I’ll survive it. When I’m with you, it feels like I’m the king of the world. I can accomplish anything with you by my side. I used to believe that you are my weakness. You are. You will always be my weakness, but you are also my strength.”
Oh wow. Wow. My throat tightened up at his confession until it felt impossible to breathe. “Artemy,” I murmured, a constant smile on my lips.
“I don’t know what love is,” Artemy mumbled, brushing his lips against mine in the lightest kiss. “But if what I feel for you is love, then so be it.”
“I don’t know what love is either,” I admitted, my fingers softly moving over his cheeks and then his lips.
Kissing me again on the lips with the slightest pressure, as if he was scared to break me, Artemy smiled. “We’ll learn it together then, Angel.”
Angel. I didn’t think I would ever get tired of Artemy calling me that.
“You called me Angel once. When I had my breakdown,” I murmured.
Artemy smiled. “Yes. I always knew you were my Angel, but I was too stubborn to admit it.”
It didn’t matter anymore if he was stubborn or not.
“You are my Angel.”
Yes, I was. I was his. I was his Angel.
And he was mine. My Made Man. My monster. Whoever he was, whether he was the killer or the sweet man he was with me, I accepted him.
I breathed him in. Closing my eyes, I let my senses take over, feeling Artemy, savoring his touch and voice. I couldn’t live without him. This beautiful broken man had given me his heart, and in return, I had laid mine in his palms.
We were two broken hearts. Two broken halves making a whole.
“I can’t promise you everything will be perfect.” My eyes snapped open at Artemy’s voice, and I waited for him to continue. “My life is not perfect. The world is fucked up and dangerous. Life is not going to be rosy. But I can promise to make it as perfect as I can. All I know is that I need you. This makes me a selfish man, Rebecca. I should let you go. You would be better off without me, but I’m selfish when it comes to you.”
My fingers went to his lips to silence him. “It’s okay. That’s all I needed to hear, Artemy. I can’t live without you, either. This is enough for me. It’s more than enough. I don’t need or want anything else. I just want you.”
Before I could say anything else, Artemy had me crushed to his chest, hugging me so tight. My ribs felt like they were about to break. “Can’t breathe,” I squeaked, but I still wrapped my arms around him, returning the hug just as fiercely.
He kissed the top of my forehead, his lips lingering there. “You are my Angel.”
There it was. Those words again.
I sighed in contentment. I love you was needed. We were more than that. The words that Artemy had whispered to me meant more than those common three words.
You are my Angel. These held more power.