Belle’s POV
When I woke up the next day, everything looks in place and no Nikolai Vyacheslav Volkov was in sight. It was silent in the room aside from the slight beeping of some of Alexei’s apparatus.
Dimitri said that his Boss left early for a meeting. I did not ask further as it’s none of my business anymore. What matters is he has agreed to sign the divorce papers later.
Before anything else, I needed to arrange Alexei’s care before I leave. Amy was able to recommend four private male nurses who will work in shifts to tend to him aside from the ones sent regularly by the hospital to check on him.
I held Alexei’s hand tightly and kissed him all over his face as I reckon that this is going to be the last time that I’m going to see him for a very long time.
“I’m sorry Alexei. I am so sorry if it has to end like this. Please wake up soon? You can visit the twins anytime you wish. Just please wake up. Your brother needs you. And the twins need you.” My heart is honestly torn between still hating him for what he and his brother did and not wanting to leave because of his condition.
“Belle, dear, may I speak with you?” Asked Matushka as she enters our room. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes and my face because I do not want her to see that even in surrender, I’m still miserable.
To my utter surprise, she slowly knelt in front of me while looking down on the floor.
“Matushka.”
“It was my fault.”
“Please, don’t do that Matushka. What’s the matter?”
“Princess, I was the one who insisted to your husbands to give Yelena our last goodbye. I prepared the memorial. I was the one who arranged that room to look like Yelena’s room without Nikolai and Alexei’s knowledge. I placed your wedding gown in that room because I was thinking that Yely would have looked so beautiful in that dress too.”
I did not know what else to say at this moment. I am so confused no words are coming out of my mouth.
“The first time we met that night when Alexei brought you to my house. I became obsessed with the thought that finally-finally I can make things right with Yelena. That you are our redemption.”
I remember that night and as I recall, she indeed calls me Yelena the first time we met. And I also remember vividly how Alexei disapproved of it. Disapproved of how his mother looked at me and called me Yelena.
“Please.” I pulled her carefully from the floor and helped her sit down on the chair. “Why did you think that I was your redemption? I don’t understand Matushka.”
“For years I refused to accept that Yelena’s death was because she ended her own life. I insisted that someone out there was responsible for her death when all this time I have known the truth. I manipulated my sons to believe that she did not kill herself but someone did. I made Nikolai and Alexei find the person behind her death for years.”
The shock and disappointment are making my stomach churn. I could not believe that Matushka could do that to her own sons.
“You lied to your sons and told them that Yelena was killed by the Mafia’s enemies when in truth, she killed herself? She committed suicide by crashing her car but all this time you made Nikolai and Alexei chase someone who does not exist since there was no one responsible for her death but herself!?”
“I wanted to protect-”
“Protect what? Who? Do you know how Nikolai and Alexei suffered because of that Matushka?! Everyday of our lives, your sons blamed themselves for what happened to Yelena. Yours and Yelena’s selfishness have ruined Nikolai and Alexei!”
This time tears are flowing down her face uncontrollably. She covers her mouth with her shaking hands, she could not even look me in the eyes.
“Did you tell them the truth? Please tell me you told them the truth.”
“I told Nikolai and Alexei the truth. They left the mansion after the church service on the memorial day because of that- because of what I have done. All of these happened because of me. So please blame me princess, but I beg of you to please talk to Nikolai.”
–
I feel like there’s a lump in my throat that is slowly suffocating me as we head to our first and probably last divorce conference with my lawyers and Nikolai’s lawyers. I’m in the car with Amy and Devon as Nikolai’s men escort us to the venue.
I’m holding the papers folded together that I was supposed to read as a condition before Nikolai signs the divorce papers. I was told that he was on the way to the meeting as well. Moments later my phone rang and it’s Nikolai.
“Baby.” He said, his voice calm and it almost feels like a soft whisper to my ear.
“Nikolai.”
“Were you able to read the letters?” He asked almost jittery.
I’m holding the folded papers in my hand tightly and to be perfectly honest, I’m so afraid of what I might find out if I read this. Matushka’s revelation was something I was not prepared to hear, but it was the inevitable truth.
“Yes. I’ve read it.” The words rolled out of my mouth as I resign to my fear and lie to him.
It took him a while to respond, but when he finally did, his voice sounded more like saying goodbye than what the words actually meant.
“Belle, ya lyublyu tebya.”
He ended the call as I was left staring at the folded papers in my hand. My teardrops have blotted the paper revealing some letters written in beautiful cursive.
There’s an old paper attached to a newer one. It’s Yelena’s letter to Nikolai.
~
My dearest Nikolai,
I terribly miss you. They still would not let me visit you and it makes me really sad. The house is not the same without you and Alex. Papa has again set his eyes to find a man for me to marry. Someone from Colombia who is a son of Papa’s friend. I believe his name is Sebastian. I don’t like him that much. He laughed at me when I fell over a puddle so I threw a handful of mud at him. You should have seen his face, it was funny! Papa got upset and told me that he will just marry me off to uncle Artemis’ son instead. He knows that I don’t like Artan. He is arrogant and thinks of himself as better than you. No one is better than you.
You are the one I want to marry someday Nikolai. You told me that you will protect me and love me as your sister, but why wouldn’t you promise to marry me? I asked you so many times before but you ignore my questions. Matushka said that I cannot marry you because you are my brother and I should never say a word about this again especially to Papa Vyacheslav and Papa Viktor.
Nikolai, I don’t care what they say, you’re still the one I want to marry. I don’t care if you are my brother. I will still love you until I die.
I miss you so much. Everyday, I will be waiting for you to come home.
Love,
Yely.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nikolai’s Letter to Belle
To my beauty,
By now you would have read one of the letters sent by Yelena when I spent time in the facility. My relationship with my sister is complicated. I did not think to talk about it with you in the past because I did not realize that it will greatly affect my relationship with you. This was my mistake and I regret not doing this at the right time.