The next morning, I woke up with the king of all hard-ons. I lay back, waiting for my morning appointment, but my sister never showed. Worse, I tried to stroke it myself and found that it wasn’t even all that satisfying. I gave up before I climaxed. It wasn’t worth it.
I saw a text from Darcy telling me that she had to head out early and I was on my own for getting to work. I rolled out of bed and went for my morning run, then showered and got dressed for work. I took the train into the city, not a bad ride, and was in the office with time to spare.
I went over to Darcy’s cube, but my sister wasn’t there. I had lunch by myself, as well. Then I went home and cooked dinner for the family. That night, again, I stayed in bed and waited for my sister to show up. But when she did, she went straight to her room without even saying goodnight.
“Are you two fighting?” my Dad asked over breakfast the next day.
“I don’t know,” I said, honestly.
Three days went past like that, to the point where I started to wonder if my dalliances with Darcy had all been imagined. What made more sense, that my sister had started doing dirty stuff with me and stopped, or that it never happened in the first place?
Then, in the middle of the workday on Wednesday, my sister came and found me in the mailroom. I worked with two other guys, both in their fifties, who liked to listen to Howard Stern extra loud and talk about girls they’d nailed at truck stops. They nearly lost it when Darcy showed up in the doorway.
“That’s my sister, guys,” I said.
“That’s sex on legs, dude,” one guy responded, even though my sister was standing right there. She gave him a tight smile.
“We need to talk,” Darcy said to me. I nodded. I braced myself for the breakup speech. How had I ended up in this place where I was actively, actually worrying that my sister was going to stop forcing me to have sex with her? “Something’s come up at home that we need to deal with. I already spoke to my boss and yours. We need to leave right now.”
I looked over at the other two guys. They shrugged and went back to filing. As soon as I was out in the hallway, I accosted my sister. “What’s wrong? Are Mom and Dad, okay?”
“Pfft, they’re fine,” Darcy said. She started walking down the hallway to the elevators. “I needed an excuse to get us out of here early. ‘Personal emergency’ was both appropriate and accurate.”
“So, there’s nothing actually wrong,” I said, following my sister a few steps behind.
“I need to get laid,” Darcy said, “That sounds like a personal emergency to me.”
We went down to the garage and got in Darcy’s car.
“You want to drive?” Darcy asked.
I was about to kneejerk a no, but I saw the look in her face and recognized the peace offering she was giving me.
“Sure,” I said. I was able to get us out of the garage without incident and only stalled once on the way to the highway.
“You’re getting way better at this,” Darcy said.
“Thanks,” I said, accelerating past a slow-moving truck.
“You’re getting way better at a lot of things,” Darcy said. I looked at her body and gave her a saucy smile. “Not that. Well, OK, that too. No, I meant, like, the life stuff. You’ve run every morning this week, haven’t you?”
I told my sister that I had.
“You’re eating better. Your cooking is almost edible. You stopped smoking pot. You’re turning into quite a catch, little brother. Good thing I’ve already got you in my net,” Darcy said, “Although if you want to call that Victoria girl from the lingerie store, I’m willing to let you. With certain caveats, of course.”
I decided that this was Darcy’s weird way of trying to give me a compliment, so I thanked her for it.
“You’re welcome,” Darcy said, “You’re the one who’s doing all the work. I had to give you a little nudge, that’s all. I know the last few days have been hard for you, but I promise the payoff will be worth it.”
I looked at my sister and paused. To this point, I’d assumed we were on some mid-afternoon nookie run. Suddenly it occurred to me that she might have something more planned. After all, since when did Darcy need to leave the office to suck me off?
“We can’t have sex, Darcy,” I said.
“You’re going to love this,” she said, “You’ll see.”
I felt my stomach churn a little. Amazing how much a car, a vehicle speeding down the road at 70mph, could feel so much like a cell.
“And after?” Darcy said, “I’ve been thinking. My office and your school aren’t far from each other at all. If we live together, we could probably spring for an apartment, you and me. Wouldn’t that be awesome?”
I pulled off the highway and turned down the road to our house.
“Turn left up at the light,” Darcy said.
“That’s not the way home,” I said.
“We’re not going home,” Darcy said. I tried to think of all the random places my sister might try to give me a blowjob. A convenience store, a bar, a playground, a library… They all seemed so implausible. Which only made them all likely Darcy sex sites.
My sister had me turn us onto a suburban road and I realized I recognized where we were. This was the other side of town, one of the more upscale neighborhoods. When had I been here before?
“Sam’s place is right up on the corner,” Darcy said, “So you should probably park here. Don’t want to be too obvious.”
Sam. Samantha. As in Samantha and her brother Dave. The ones my sister swore were secret sibling sex buddies.
“We’re going to Sam’s house?” I asked. The knots in my stomach twisted around each other. I was running out of intestines to bend.
“Duh. This took a lot of doing, so don’t screw it up,” Darcy said. She took my hand and led me down the street.
Sam’s house was one of those McMansion places that were built in the early aughts before the economy went down the tubes. The whole neighborhood was one big house next to the other till the scale got messed up and you thought it all looked normal. Like seeing a parking lot full of Hummers, a relic from another era, yet no less impressive.
My sister led me across Sam’s well-manicured front lawn and around to the back of her house. There was an inground pool and a small patio with a barbecue set that cost as much as a new car.
Darcy pulled at the sliding glass door and it opened easily. She put her finger to her mouth.
“Do they know we’re coming?” I asked, staying outside.
“Sam does,” Darcy said, “Dave doesn’t. Come on, we have to hurry, or all my work will be wasted.”
The house seemed empty. Our footsteps echoed. We walked through the massive kitchen and up the stairs. On the walls were multiple pictures of a happy family through the years. I recognized Sam in them and realized that her whole family had the same exact nose and mouth. They looked less like relatives and more like strange clones of each other. It was unnerving.
Down the hallway, Darcy led me back to a boy’s bedroom. It was painted grey with walnut furniture. A couple of sports trophies sat on one of the dressers. There was a closet on the back wall with slatted, white, wooden double doors.
Darcy threw open the closet and pushed me inside. She followed after me. We were covered in heavy coats, standing on old shoe boxes, but there was enough room for both of us. More importantly, we could both see out of the slats and into the boy’s bedroom.
I started to ask a question, but Darcy shushed me. We stood there, silent, staring at the empty room. The closet started to feel hot. It smelled of mothballs and old leather. I felt like a criminal.
I heard the sounds of heavy footsteps. Then voices. I recognized Sam’s immediately.
“No, your room,” Sam said.
The door popped open and two twenty-somethings fell into the room, wrapped around each other. They were kissing like it was the only way to get oxygen. The room filled with the sounds of gasping mixed with wet smacks.
Sam was even prettier than I remembered. Her body had filled out some, but she was still straight as a board compared to Darcy. There was no doubt that the boy she was kissing was her brother. He had that same family face. Their hair was even the exact same color.