I lost my favorite person, Isadora swallowed fifty sleeping pills and ended her life.
She collapsed in front of me without even bothering to say her last words to me.
It was like a dream, and when Jasper told me that she wasn’t breathing anymore, it was like something had been pulled out of my brain and I couldn’t hold on to it.
How could I not realize? , How could I not realize she was sick? , I asked myself over and over again, what was wrong?
Why can you be crazy and cruel to her just because you saw her and Jasper being close?
I can’t forgive myself, I know deep down that I absolutely love her the most in the world, but I’m also the biggest asshole!
I didn’t deserve to love her, much less be loved by her, and I fell on top of her, crying hysterically.
How I wished she would be like she used to be, gently lifting her hand to wipe away my tears, “Everett, don’t be sad.”
But no more, it’s all gone, I’ve lost her forever …
Never again will there be someone who, no matter how tired they are, will cook me a bowl of hot rice, and never again will there be someone who, no matter what I say, will unconditionally tolerate me and give in to me …
In a trance, I saw the white pills scattered on the floor, and I grabbed them regardless and brought them to my mouth.
Take me away, Isadora. how can I live without you?
But Jasper grabbed my hand beforethe pills even made it to my mouth.
He looked at me like I was an enemy and said coldly, “You can’t die, you have to live. Because even if you die, Isadora doesn’t want to see you.”
I cried uncontrollably, hating the fact that it was myself who was now dead, and if I could do it all over again, I would never do those ridiculous things again.
I want her to be ruthless, selfish, cruel, cold and hit me hard and scold me.
At that time, I will kneel at her feet and confess the boundless sins I have committed.
Unfortunately, time won’t start over.
The rest of my life will be spent in infinite remorse and guilt.
But that’s okay, it’s only a few short decades.
Isadora, you wait for me.