*Keera*
“Are you going to stand here looking at her or are you actually going to go over there and talk to her?” Lexi asked, coming to stand beside me, a half eaten hot dog in her hand. I tried to quickly drag my gaze away from Ginny but it was already too late. I’d been caught red handed. I steered my gaze to Lexi’s, accepting the glass she was handing me. I brought the cup to my nose, arcing my eyebrow at her.
She could be a little crazy sometimes.
“Beer, really?” I asked dryly. Lexi of all people knew how much I tried to stay away from alcohol. It was embarrassing to admit but I was a terrible lightweight. I couldn’t handle my alcohol so I just stayed clear of it all together. I didn’t need people knowing how easy it was to get me drunk. It didn’t match my tough girl persona, and more than that I tended to become a lot more crazy and blunt when I was drunk.
Lexi smiled cheekily, touching her hotdog. Holding the glass like she was making a toast. “It’s just a little liquid courage, you know?” Her eyebrows wiggled dramatically. I sighed, already knowing she’d had more than a little alcohol to drink. My gaze strayed to Ginny again and I threw caution to wind, downing the contents of the glass in one go.
Lexi and I gazed at the sky as I waited for the alcohol to kick in. Fireworks exploded from all around us making colorful splatches in the air. I wasn’t entirely sure what victim they were on right now. Probably the sixth or seventh, still a very long way to go. I liked that they were trying to take the ritual slowly so it wasn’t too painful. It was easier on everiand it helped ease the tension.
After each of the victims’ family and friends read out a tribute and burnt it in the bonfire, everyone took a moment to either make small talk, munch on something or play with fireworks. Ria rang a tiny bell whenever everyone needed to gather around so they could do the same for the next victim. “You should go now,” Lexi whispered, her eyes still on the fireworks. I twisted my lips to the side, knowing I could easily make up an excuse. I didn’t have to talk to her if I didn’t want to. I guess that was what stopped me from talking myself out of it.
I wanted to.
Ginny had been giving me signals that she wanted a conversation ever since I’d arrived at the pack. In all honesty, I wasn’t fully ready to rehash the past yet. I couldn’t promise that I could talk about it without getting pissed all over again and starting an argument. It’s been six years now. I was supposed to have gotten over it. But since I hadn’t even given myself time to come to terms with our fall out, thinking or talking about it was going to feel like it had happened only last month.
I wasn’t ready for that yet.
I just wanted to finally stop acting like she didn’t exist. Especially since this was a very difficult time for her. I’d been able to gather that she’d been extremely close to Sam and she was going to be representing his family since he didn’t exactly have one. I wasn’t so cold hearted that I wouldn’t at least acknowledge her pain. I knew what I had to do. Doing it was the actual problem. I was a bundle of nerves and it surprised me because it was Ginny. I’d never had any reason to be nervous around her.
Then again we’d never spent such a huge time not talking either.
“I’m going to go when they finish with the next one,” I finally responded. As if on cue, Ria began ringing the bell. I almost sighed when everyone began heading towards the fire. I’d thought I was at least going to have a few more minutes to brace myself. Lexi and I headed to the fire, lowering ourselves to the ground as we took our positions next to each other in the large circle.
A tall man with dark hair stepped out in the middle of the circle. He introduced himself as the victim’s father. My heart broke when I realized the victim had been his fated mate. I met Lexi’s eyes and saw the concern I was feeling mirrored in hers. We’d been told that it was extremely difficult for werewolves to survive without their fated mates. Even as tried to read out as loud as he could, his grip on the paper wasn’t steady. He looked like he could break down at any moment.
Luckily, I wasn’t the only one seeing that.
A teen of about sixteen, maybe seventeen years walked up to him and pulled him into a hug. My heart tugged at the sight, and I looked away because of how emotional the scene was. I wasn’t sure if the girl was his daughter or not but what really mattered was that she’d been brave enough to walk up to him and offer some comfort. Fifteen minutes later, everyone had scattered again, talking and eating and shooting fireworks.
Lexi nudged me with her shoulder.
She handed me another shot glass but I waved my hand to tell her I was fine. I was already feeling the alcohol beginning to kick in. I drew in a deep breath and then headed to where Ginny was sitting on the sand. She was wrapping up a conversation with someone and I slowed down my pace so they could be done before I got to her. Ginny gave him a hug and then he rose to his feet and left her by herself.
I felt my nerves knotting themselves but I didn’t stop walking to her. It felt like it took a decade getting to her when in reality it was only a few seconds. I lowered myself beside her, pressing my lips down together and keeping an expressionless face. She turned to see who it was and I could feel her surprise, her gaze burning into the side of my face. Her lips parted like she had something to say but she thought against it and remained silent instead.
I let out the breath I didn’t even know I’d been holding when she finally moved her gaze away from mine. We sat in silence for a few moments, simply taking in the fireworks above us. Surprisingly, the silence wasn’t awkward. If anything it was filled with a kind of relief. The kind one felt after finally getting something over with. Even though we weren’t nearly close to being tight friends again, it felt nice to be close to each other.
Share the same air.
“Tough night, huh? Sorry about that.” I eventually said quietly. She turned to look at me then but I continued staring right ahead. I didn’t want to make this bigger than it already was. I didn’t want to talk about anything that had happened in the past. It was inevitable enough, but I was willing to put it off for as long as I could and just dwell in the moment.
Luckily, she got the message.
She shifted her attention away from my face, pulling her dark hair behind her ear. “The toughest,” She agreed, her voice sounding as low as mine. She bit down on her lower lip. I knew her well enough to know she was trying to keep from saying what she had on her mind. And it was only a matter of time before she voiced it anyway. As if on cue, she blurted, “Thank you for coming over.”
I tensed.
She was subtly acknowledging that it wasn’t a normal occurrence and I didn’t want that. Then again, maybe I was a little delusional for thinking we could just go on talking and acting like I hadn’t avoided saying more than one word to her since I arrived at the pack. I gave a casual shrug. “You’re welcome.” The silence returned after that and this time it was a little awkward.
I thought about leaving right away but she stopped me with her next words. “I miss you. I’m really sorry about everything.” Her words were like a sucker punch to my gut. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from saying anything. She sounded sincere, but then again, she’d always sounded sincere all the time in the past. Suddenly I was beginning to see the reason she hadn’t liked talking down on werewolves when we had been friends.
She’d been one.
I remember myself trying to move on. Thinking about it now and finding more reasons to be hurt weren’t going to help. I simply nodded to show that I’d heard her. Saying the words back did feel right. Not when I knew they were going to be complete bull. “It’ll be fine, I guess.” I eventually managed, smiling my fake smile. I wondered as I turned to catch her eyes if she could still tell the difference.
She could.
We smiled a secret genuine smile then. I’d been trying to bullshit her and she’d caught it. Maybe we could still work things out after all. “Can I hug you?” She asked softly. I turned my head to look at her. I could tell she expected me to refuse. She was subtly holding a breath and trying to act casual. There was no doubt about it. She was clearly waiting for me to turn her down.
It was for that reason I didn’t.
I wasn’t going to let her think I was that predictable.
“Sure.” I answered. Her eyes widened and the next thing I knew she was pulling me into a hug like she couldn’t wait even one second longer. Naturally, I tensed when she curved her arms around me, resting her cheek on my shoulder. We hadn’t hugged in six years. It should feel different, awkward. But it didn’t. Hell, the only reason it felt a little off was because I was sitting stiffly and not returning it. Which had to be understandable, right? Lexi caught my eyes then and she motioned me to put my arms around her.
I shook my head subtly.
I wasn’t sure I could do it.
She made a gesture with her hands, urging me on.
Expelling a deep breath, I slowly circled my arms around her. Her body deflated in relief and she hugged me tighter. I closed my eyes, resting my chin on her shoulder and finally admitting it to myself. I had missed this. Talking to her, hugging her. I had missed her. We remained like that until Ria began ringing the bell. We pulled apart as she began asking everyone to gather around. I gave her shoulder a small squeeze and stood up to get back to my position in the circle.
A movement behind the bushes caught my attention.
I frowned, turning to see if anyone had also heard the sound or if it had been just me. Apparently, it had been just me. I cautiously walked towards the sound before I would decide against it, wanting to quell my curiosity. The sound of voices was the first thing I noted and it almost had me turning back because I reasoned it would most likely happen to be two people making out. I realized whose voice it was after I’d decided to head back.
Elena’s.
I creased my eyebrows in confusion. Why would Elena be having a conversation behind bushes? Was she seeing someone she didn’t want the pack members to know about? My curiosity had me walking back to them. I pushed a branch out of my line of sight and peeked, catching sight of them. Elena was standing with a guy, her back to me. She was blocking my view of him so I could only see his hair and the side of his body. I waited for her to move, surprise coursing through me when she tiptoed to kiss his mouth. I was even more surprised when I realized who it was.
One of the guys on Gabe’s team.