I woke up this morning and went straight to my mirror. I asked myself is this who I am. Was I seriously giving River, the man who walked away without even a snicker of regret another chance? I was.
Because even though he hurt me. He has been good for Jo. She smiles a lot when he brings her back.
The sound of my phoning ringing has me rushing to where I left it charging. I hit the coffee table with my knee and curse, not even looking at the screen I pick it up,
“Hello.”
“Morning Hannah banana.”
I squeak, “Hi.” How the hell did he get my number?
“I’m on my way you got an hour woman.” River cuts the call before I even reply. I stare at the phone and my mind is still processing that twenty-two-second call.
It’s almost an hour that passes, I’m just putting my purple pumps on when the knock sounds on the door. Jo rushes right past me and throws the old thing open. I stand up to my full height and my mouth waters at the vision before me.
He’s wearing a new pair of black jeans, a white and red pair of Jordan’s with a black tee under his cut, that now has the title of President on the left side of his jacket. Which means he is now the President of the club.
I’m not surprised by this because DJ has kept me on the ‘I need to know’ regarding River. And that ‘need to know’ was everything.
“Hey River,” Jo practically yells.
“Morning kid.” He pulls her hair as he comes through the door and my stomach makes a funny noise just before he walks on up to me and kisses me smack on the lips.
The leer in his gaze makes me flush and I bite my lip.
“Morning Hannah.”
I mumble a response and practically run to the door where my five-year-old stands giggling. I leave the keys in the door already knowing River will lock up.
It’s twenty minutes later when we leave the air-conditioned truck and step on out into the chaos of the town’s annual fair.
Jo holds my hand as River keeps his pace a foot behind us. I don’t question this because like all the folks in town, I know about the recent deaths in Kanla. We also know The Satan Snipers are trying to catch the killers.
Jo tugs on my hand as River pays our entrance fee. I bend my back, dropping my ear.
“All the Satan Snipers are here momma, look.”
I lift my head and as true to form it is basically all of them.
A touch on my lower back gets me standing upright. I spin around ready to give someone either a hug or a punch when I see it’s only River.
“Did you know that your entire club is going to be here?” Is what comes out.
“Yup.” He pops out the p.
“Is it because of all those murders?”
“Something like that.” His eyes steal the rest of my questions with a promise of later.
His hand interlocks mine with a stolen comfort of more. It’s in those two actions that I know River is here for me. He is giving himself to me. Offering me him.
Jo moves to the other side of River and we head straight for the Ferris wheel. It is a long line to stand in and the Southern sun is making the wait even longer.
“You ever been on this thing before?” I ask River who still got his hand in mine.
“Yeah, fifteen years ago I spent the entire day on this wheel. DJ insisted I bring her here, wasn’t good for my reputation to be seen taking my cousin so I saw the Ferris wheel and said fuck it. I don’t think Daisy Jane has been back since.” He squeezes my hand as my face stretches into a big smile.
“That explains a lot. Every year I ask her to join but she always has an excuse.”
“That’s Daisy Jane, she’s a once bitten never chance it kinda girl.”
Our turn comes an hour later. I’m sticky and sweaty in my denim shorts and spaghetti strap top. River is wearing way more than me and he hasn’t broken out a sweat. He hasn’t complained. We’ve been talking about DJ then his club and finally Jo and him. I knew they had gotten close but not so close, I am actually a tinge bit jealous.
Especially now, because the ride only has place for two people on one seat. And my kid insists on sitting next to River, not me.
I end up sitting next to Mr. Crane and the old fart stinks like old beer mixed with sour cream, yuck. And every time the breeze blows I taste it in my mouth.
My head begins to spin with an underlying headache while my kid and River laugh and put their hands up having the time of their lives.
I’m going to kick his butt the minute I am done here. I swear, vow to myself for the full seven minutes of the ride that I am going to kill River ten times over.
By the time the ride is done, the inside of my head resembles the inside of a rock concert.
My temper is fire and my determination short-lived when he carries Jo down then turns to me beaming.
I have never seen the man look so young, carefree. It’s something else and knocks me of quilter.
“That was good.” And just those words leaving his lips simmers my anger.
I guess a headache isn’t so bad.
I give my kid a hug, “You liked it?”
“Best ride ever, River said we can go again later.”
I am not going on that ride later, I don’t say that to either of the two happy go lucky campers.
I just smile and scratch the top of my kid’s head.
Four hours later and seven rides under my day belt I’m finally done. I never liked rides, and right now that isn’t changing anytime soon.
After a long tiring day, we are finally heading home. We are in the truck, Jo is sleeping.
“I take it you didn’t have a good time?” River says this to me as my eyes remain cast on the dry country road.
“It was okay, I guess. I’m not a fan of fair rides. Never liked it.”
He chuckles at my confession and a small smile paints my face,
“You and Daisy Jane are a lot more alike than I thought.”
“Me and Daisy Jane are a lot more different than you think too.”
“So Jo is out and she ain’t waking up anytime soon, wanna stop at the Clubhouse quick.”
My head snaps to face him, his eyes are on the road. His elbow on the edge of the window, his hand dangling freely, as his other remains stuck on the steering wheel.
“Uhmmm yeah okay,” I say it like I mean it. It doesn’t really bother me.
We are going to pass the Clubhouse anyway.
Another fifteen minutes and we are parking in one of the three parking bays designated for their cars.
The rest is all for the bikes.
I spot a few Satan Snipers outside their house. They give chin dips and I wave hi as River salutes them jumping out of the car.
The one comes forward and I see it is Killer. The guy is a dream man. A cold deadly one.
“Need you to watch Jo, wanna show Hannah something.” River says it like an order and I expect this guy to refuse but he just leans against the white truck and dips his head.
Wow, okay then.
We walk past the Clubhouse and over a hill. I never knew that the Clubhouse blocked such scenery. I’m wondering where we’re going.
River keeps pace ahead of me the entire time. It isn’t like I can ask him.
But I see it, the lake, the walking area. It is extraordinary.
I stop just on the hill and take it all in. The number of trees surrounding the other side. The water glistening under the sun’s deadly heat. It is all so surreal.
It is like he can hear me because he stops halfway down the hill and faces me.
His face now masked by a seriousness I have come to know as a normal River mask.
I walk down until I stand directly in front of him, my eyes half-dazed,
“Why did you bring me here?” It is words I don’t want to know the answer to, but it is that same answer I need.
“I bring Jo here, we sit there.” He points to the bank right on the edge of the lake.
“So this is your secret place.”
“Yeah, but that isn’t why I brought you here.” He closes the gap between us, his hand cupping my cheek.
“Oh.” It is the only coherent word I think I could say now.
“You once told me that I needed to find my keeper.” I start to shake my head already having an idea where this is going.
He slides his finger’s behind my neck, and I look into his blue eyes, “You don’t even know me River, that day I gave you something and you didn’t even want it. You hurt me.”
He drops his rugged face until our foreheads touch, “I have been in love Hannah, I have lost so many people. Fuck, I lost my brother, my own flesh and blood but I have never found a keeper until the day I met you. Over these months I watched you, I got to know you from afar because I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it next to you. And baby you are my keeper, maybe it’s fucked up because we haven’t even spoken much but Hannah give me a fucking chance. Please, I beg you.”
I think it’s raining but it is just my eyes leaking.
I’m crying, oh gosh I am crying. I nod my head like I’m crazy, saying yes, yes, yes. He kisses me and I swear it is then I know that River is mine.
We sit by the lake until River’s phone rings. One call and my man is running up the hill. I don’t stop him because whatever it is must be important.
I sit by myself watching the suns lasting rays on the lake waters. Then I walk back up the hill for the first time at peace.
I am not sure where our road would lead. I am not sure whether it will lead in the same direction but I know that we got a good shot.
Killer waits in the driver’s seat to take Jo and me home. I get in not wondering, but knowing that River will be there as soon as he can.