My heart felt like a ball of cotton was stuck in my heart, and I felt a sudden pain. I watched him shake his head, tears choked in his eyes, and it was very uncomfortable, “Dennis, I never wanted a hero.”
He smiled lightly and took my hand to his lips. His lips were very cold. I knew that his anesthesia had passed, and the wound was starting to hurt.
He said, “Four years ago, I accidentally harmed you and your child, and four years later I accidentally harmed you again. I’m sorry, I know you have a grudge in your heart. Actually, that’s fine. I know Clarie. When an accident happened, you left without saying a word. You asked Folly, begged the Kennedy family, but you just forgot me. I don’t blame you for not thinking about me the first time when you were in danger. I blame me for not doing well enough. I’m sorry for making you think of relying on me when things go wrong.”
I opened my mouth, wanting to deny it, but inexplicably found that what he said was the truth.
It’s not worth what to say. After a pause, I can only say, “Dennis, don’t talk!”
He smiled, “It’s okay, I’m willing to wait, I’m willing to work hard, and wait for you to put me first.”
I always thought that I lived half my life with only one Dennis alive, but now that I think about it, I don’t actually have one.
Maybe I only live by myself, I don’t seem to know how to let go and forget, and I am accustomed to carry all the past on my back and move on.
I don’t want to meet new people, and I don’t want to let go of all my former lovers.
So along the way, we all worked hard.
After the anesthesia was completely over, he was sweating from the pain, but I couldn’t do anything. I washed the towel and wiped his sweat. He just looked at me and smiled, as if it wasn’t me that was hurting.
Seeing me crouching by the bed, he said, “Clara, what are you doing?”
I know, he just wanted to talk to me and divert his attention.
I unbuttoned the urine bag and said after a while, “Change the urine bag!”
There was no more of his voice, and it seemed that for a moment, he was silent.
I know that people who are looked up to, never want to be seen like this, and I understand his embarrassment.
Silently taking care of everything, he closed his eyes and seemed to be asleep.
But the dense sweat stains on his forehead told me that he did not, and I silently wiped his sweat with a towel.
His hand was held down by him, his eyes were facing each other, his eyes were too deep and pitch black.
At this time, silence is the best.
I didn’t speak, neither did he, I wiped his sweat, I moved slightly closer to him, and gave him a light kiss on the lips.
“Dennis, I’m your wife, it’s not embarrassing, we will get sick and die of old age in the future, all of which will slowly pass over time, this is normal and not embarrassing.”
He looked at me with deep eyes, and it took him a long time to let go of me.
The doctor said that you can eat some liquid food. Luna cooked some porridge and I blew it cold and fed him.
He didn’t seem to want to eat it, but every time I brought the porridge to his mouth, he looked at me and ate it anyway.
We came and went, but we ate half the bowl. Luna looked at us and sat silently.
After feeding him, Luna handed me a new serving of porridge, water in his eyes.
“You have to eat too,”she said. “You can’t starve yourself.”
I looked up at her, saw the sadness and distress in her eyes, took the porridge subconsciously, and realized that there was still Dennis left in my hand.
The potion was too much, Dennis couldn’t hold it, and fell asleep.
Luna looked at me, saw that I had taken a few bites, and put it down, feeling a little distressed, she said, “Always eat more, otherwise you will have the energy to take care of him.”
I thought it was the same, and I forced myself to take a few bites, but I put down the box when I couldn’t eat it.
She packed up and looked at me, still very distressed, “You must take care of yourself.”
I was too busy looking at her, and felt a little stuck in my heart. I couldn’t hold back, looked at her and said, “What were you thinking when you threw me away?”
Such a topic is a bit abrupt. Over the years, I have told others every day that it’s okay to have no biological parents, I don’t need it.
But, in fact, every time I see other people walking with their parents and acting like a spoiled child, I am very envious. I am afraid that others will see through this envy, so I dare not look at it more.
She burst into tears and trembled a little. I knew it was a sad and uncomfortable emotion.
Without waiting for her answer, I said to myself, “When I was a child, I wrote an essay and won an award. When I was in the third grade, the title of the essay was ‘My mother’. My grandmother was very happy and asked me, “I want to If you want to see my composition, I didn’t show her, and I didn’t even show her Muzi, who went to school with me, originally I wanted to burn that composition, but in the end I couldn’t bear it.”
Seeing her wipe her tears, I sighed, “Actually, you are not the same as the mother I imagined. When I was a child, I always wondered what my mother was like, because I have never met her, so I think she should be like Muzi’s mother. That way, she likes to nag. Every time Muzi doesn’t get up in the morning, she will stand beside Muzi’s bed and nag until Muzi collapses. It is also possible that my mother will be like Ann’s mom in the alley. She always likes to give Ann to Ann. Buy beautiful dresses and good-looking things, I have thought a lot about what you look like, but I just never thought about you, you don’t seem to be what I imagined, without the beauty and warmth I expected, your appearance did not give me Brings beauty and joy, but only pain.”
Her voice was choked, probably too uncomfortable, and she didn’t catch her breath for a while.
She said, “Clara, I’m sorry, I was wrong, you give me another chance, I will try my best, and I must be the mother you imagined.”
I feel a little sad. The people I miss day and night after I was a child, I found out when I grew up that maybe some people are only suitable for living and their memory will be good enough.
I pulled a tissue for her and asked her to wipe her tears, “I can’t understand your feelings and sadness when you abandoned me, but I can understand your love for your child. Grandma said, no matter how dark our road is, we must There is sunshine, but I can’t sit until I face the sunshine, you are all right, probably only your life is wrong. I blamed you at first, but now I don’t.”
People in this world are not perfect. Luna and Samuel are neither bad nor good. As parents, although they are at fault, they are not all wrong.
I’m probably a lucky person. I met Dennis’s love, and my parents were not ruthless and unrighteous, and I was lucky.
Anyone who met the mother Kris spoke of would inevitably feel disgusted in their hearts.
Sheila ‘s fate is tragic enough. She was lost when she was a child, and now she has achieved something, but she was forced by her biological parents.
Think about it carefully, how can life be perfect, who is not a chicken feather in one place, but still has to travel forward and live bravely.
Luna said, “Clara, I know that you have been very hard all these years. In the future, we will walk with you. As long as you leave us, we will always be there.”