“I’m sorry I hurt you,” I mumbled. “I wasn’t trying to. I was trying to do what was best for us, for our pack, for our family.” I cried.
“For us?” Ethan asked. His tone was low and deadly.
“For our future,” I choked.
“Our future? You were doing all of this for us? Did you leave me for Shane for us? Did you hurt me for us? Did you walk into the arms of our enemy for us? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? Do you think that I’d… You… What else did you do for us, Adea? Can you look me in the eye and tell me in detail all of the things you’ve done ‘for us’?”
I moved before I meant to. My palm smacked against his cheek, the sound resounded around us even above all of the noise. My jaw dropped. Why had I done that? Why did I do that? Was it anger? I was angry at him for calling me out. I was angry about his suggestive tone. I was angry at what his words were suggesting and he wasn’t wrong.
He wasn’t wrong at all. I’d done a lot. I’d committed many sins against Ethan since I came to Half Moon. I did him so wrong. I had used us as an excuse when I started to feel more for Shane. I had used the friends as an excuse when my heart pounded for Shane. I had used my family as an excuse as I spread my legs for him.
Ethan was right. He got me there and I didn’t have the right to slap him. I didn’t have the right to be angry at him. I had fucked up. I was the one in the wrong. Ethan’s face was turned from me and his cheek was reddening. My eyes widened and I covered my mouth. No. I hadn’t meant to do that. I didn’t mean to slap him. I… damn it, Adea.
“I’m sorry, Ethan. I-” I started. Ethan turned his head slowly until our eyes locked. He searched my eyes and I could see the questions reflected in his eyes. As much as I wanted to soothe him, I didn’t have any answers.
“It’s fine. We don’t have time for this right now anyway,” Ethan said coldly.
“I’m sorry,” I started. “I didn’t mean for all of this to happen. I didn’t mean to slap you. I was just trying to protect everyone. I was trying to prevent the dream from happening.”
“And?” Ethan asked.
“What?” I asked.
“And? Did you?”
“I’m not following,” I whispered.
“Did you prevent the dream from happening? Did you stop the past from repeating itself?” Ethan asked. My stomach dropped to my toes. The question gutted me.
“No,” I said. “I failed but I was able to change some things. I’ve found out some things too, so many things. There’s so much I need to tell you. The-”
“That’s enough, Adea! Right now. You’re safe and I have you. I won’t let anything else happen to you.” Ethan said. “We don’t have time for any of this right now. We’ve already wasted more time talking than we have.” His eyes looked past me. I didn’t bother saying anything else. He wasn’t looking at me, he wasn’t focused on me. He wasn’t going to listen to me right now. “I found you,” he growled.
There was so much hate in his voice, my brows knitted, and my forehead furrowed. There was only one person he hated enough to warrant that look in his eyes. My chest whirred and it was filled with warmth. Elijah pushed forward and I followed his line of sight. My gaze locked on Shane.
Shane wasn’t looking at Ethan. He was focused on one thing and one thing only, me. He stared back at me and the panic is back in full force. A crippling pain tears through my chest as Ethan’s arms fall from around me. I want to grab onto Ethan and stop him from going to Shane. I want to beg Ethan to stop this war, I want to beg him to go home. I want to leave. At the same time, I want to run to Shane. I want to throw my arms around him. I want to kiss him and tell him that I didn’t mean it. My throat tightens as I stare at Shane. My world is cold and warm as I stand at the precipice of two choices.
It hurts too much to cry. My eyes are locked on my mate as footsteps come closer. Something drops near my head and I’m aware as he leans down and grips me by my hair. The last thing I see before my head smashed against something hard is the empty look in Ethan’s eye. His eyes are on my face as he takes another step. My shoulders shake, my chin trembles, and tears run down my face.
Will that happen again? Will I lose Ethan? Will I lose Shane? What was I supposed to do? How was I supposed to feel right now? What was wrong and what was right? Whatever I’d done had been wrong but… I was conflicted. What was wrong and what was right. Whatever I’d done had been wrong.
“Shane!” Ethan howled.
I flinched. The fights around us came to a standstill as both Alpha’s glared at each other from across the battlefield. I couldn’t stop staring at Shane. How was he alive? How was he standing? How was he breathing? I wanted to cry and laugh at the same time. I wanted to run to him and see if he was okay. I wanted to apologize and say that I was wrong. I wanted to beg for his forgiveness. I wanted to explain but I couldn’t make myself move.
That same question flashed in my mind. The one that I hadn’t wanted to answer but now that I was faced with the two of them, the question was here again. I had the chance to choose again and I was afraid. I wasn’t sure what I would choose. I wasn’t sure what I would do. I wasn’t sure who I would choose. I was given the chance, the opportunity to choose without regrets this time. Would I choose differently, or would I still choose the same?