I know how I felt today and I knew I had been unfaithful. I didn’t sleep with Shane but I had been unfaithful with my body and my heart. Even so, I still chose Ethan. I don’t know if he would still choose me but I would continue to choose him.
I still loved Ethan but I would not let Shane see this, I couldn’t. I wouldn’t give him a reason to be suspicious of me. Ethan was broken physically and I don’t know where he was mentally but tonight, I’d have to break his heart.
I was playing an angle, playing a role, playing Shane and I was too deep, too involved to turn back now. I had hoped to keep my mate out of this, away from here but that wasn’t going to happen and I needed to accept that. I couldn’t let myself be swayed by Ethan’s presence.
I said this yesterday while I drove away from Desert Moon and I’m going to repeat it today. A brokenhearted Ethan is a very much alive Ethan. Was he going to hate me? Yes. Was I going to hurt him? Yes, I was going to hurt him but he would be alive. I’d do whatever I could to keep him that way.
I didn’t think Shane would kill him with us mated and marked. He couldn’t kill him without figuring that out first. If he killed Ethan, I could die too and we’d both die. I might not be able to survive it.
Yes, I know I’ve seen a life where I survive Ethan’s death but that was a different life, it wasn’t this one. Maybe I could remind him of this and they’ll go easier on him but I can’t be too quick to suggest that.
“Surprise,” Shane said.
His voice was low and the false joy was not lost on me. He wasn’t pleased that we were here with Ethan but it wasn’t just that. I could hear the sadness as it mixed with suspicion. A storm cloud hovered the amazing day we’d had.
“Do you like it?” Shane asked.
I bit my bottom lip to stop it from quivering. I couldn’t show that I was scared or fearful. I needed to put on the best poker face I could muster. I looked up at Shane and held his gaze when our eyes locked.
“What is the meaning of this?” I asked, I tried to sound bored. I know he wasn’t buying it and I needed to try harder. I needed to be better, I needed to convince him that Ethan was nothing. Despite the mark on my neck, I needed Shane to believe that only a mark kept me and Ethan together.
My mate groans and it takes everything in me to remain cold and unsympathetic when it came to Ethan. Shane turns to look at Ethan, cocking his head in that psychotic way that makes him look 10 times more dangerous than he already did.
My gaze darts around the room and I find Liam leaning against the wall. His gaze is void of emotion as he stares at the wall opposite the room. Something is wrong with him, he isn’t the same Liam I remember. I wonder what happened but at the same time, I don’t want to know. Devin is seated in a chair beside the same wall that Liam is resting against.
“Oh him? We found him at the border.” Shane watched me calculatingly, I could feel his gaze on me as he looked for an expression that would answer whatever question he had in his head. Before I could say anything, he spoke.
“There was a disturbance early this morning before the sun rose. Everyone was fast asleep in their bed. It was before you woke up and I didn’t want to wake you. Imagine my surprise, when I received news that your mate had walked in like he owned the place? He killed a lot of my men, there were bodies everywhere. Duke has been busy getting rid of them all day. Did you know about this?”
“No, Shane,” I said.
I shook my head as I stared into his eyes. Whatever he saw there must have been enough to convince him I was telling the truth because his gaze softened. I fought the urge to sigh. So far, I was okay but I was walking on a thin rope.
I watched helplessly as Shane left my side and made his way toward Ethan. There was nothing I could do. I had to figure out what I could say, what I could do. Even then, I had to tread carefully.
I flinch as Shane kicks Ethan in the stomach. Ethan groans, his head lolls around as he stirs. When he lifts his chin, he struggles to keep it up. Eventually, when he opens his eyes, they widen as they lock on Shane. He’s weak but he managed a threatening growl. I choke back a sob as I stare at him.
After the dream, I wasn’t sure how I would feel when I saw him again. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried that I would hate him. Because I had been, my dreams weren’t just dreams. They had been gifts. I don’t know who sent them but I was thankful for it. I was thankful for the chance to step into another life. It’s making sense of the dreams that are the issue. Seeing him now, I’m thankful that I don’t feel any different. I was right about continuing with the plan, I’d made the right choice.
Where were the others? Why had he come alone? Why had he made such a stupid decision? Why had Odis let him leave on his own? Where was Odis? Was he here with the warriors, or had Ethan left in the morning without letting anyone know?
“Where are the others?” Shane asked.
“Fuck you, ass wipe,” Ethan coughed as he glared at Shane.