Ezra and Cyrus sat on the porch, the night’s chill settling in. Cyrus leaned back, a casual smirk playing on his lips as he lit a cigarette. The soft glow of party lights flickered behind them.
“So, what’s the deal? You’ve been quiet all night,” Ezra asked, taking a swig from his beer bottle.
Cyrus exhaled a cloud of smoke, looking off into the distance. “I screwed up, man. Big time.”
Ezra raised an eyebrow. “Yeah? What’d you do this time?”
Cyrus chuckled, though there was no humor in it. “Tried to kiss her. She wasn’t into it. I got pissed and… choked her. Not hard, but enough to scare her.”
Ezra’s expression hardened, but he kept his voice steady. “You serious? You can’t just go around grabbing people like that, Cyrus. Even you should know better.”
Cyrus shrugged, his face a mask of indifference. “She just wasn’t listening. I didn’t mean to hurt her. It just happened.”
Ezra stared at him for a moment, then shook his head. “Man, that’s messed up. You can’t treat people like that, no matter how mad you get.”
Cyrus flicked his cigarette away, a slight frown creasing his brow. “Yeah, I get it. Doesn’t mean I have to like it. It’s just… I’m used to getting what I want. Guess that doesn’t work here.”
Ezra leaned back, crossing his arms. “Look, you might be used to getting your way, but this isn’t a joke. You need to fix this, and I don’t mean just with her. You need to figure out why you thought that was okay in the first place.”
Cyrus’s eyes narrowed, irritation flashing briefly. “I know I messed up, okay? I don’t need a lecture.”
Ezra held up his hands in a calming gesture. “I’m not lecturing you. Just saying you need to think about this. You want to be that guy? The one who scares people off because he can’t control his temper?”
Cyrus sighed, running a hand through his hair. “No, I don’t. It’s just… complicated. I’ve always been like this, you know?”
Ezra nodded, softening his tone slightly. “Yeah, I know. But just because it’s how you’ve been doesn’t mean it’s how you have to stay. You’re better than this, man. Don’t let one mistake define you.”
Cyrus looked at Ezra, his tough exterior cracking just a bit. “I don’t know how to make it right. She probably hates my guts now.”
Ezra shrugged. “She might. But you’ve got to own up to it. Apologize, and not just because you’re supposed to. Do it because you know it’s the right thing.”
Cyrus grunted, nodding reluctantly. “Yeah, maybe. I’ll think about it.”
Ezra clapped him on the back. “Good. Just don’t go making things worse. You’ve got a chance to fix this, but only if you actually try.”
Cyrus smirked, a glint of his old self returning. “Alright, alright. I’ll figure it out. Thanks, man. I guess you’re not entirely useless.”
Ezra laughed, shaking his head. “Anytime, you idiot. Just try to keep out of trouble for once.”
Cyrus flicked his chin up, a mischievous glint in his eye. “No promises. But I’ll give it a shot.”
Ezra watched as Cyrus got up, tossing his cigarette butt aside. “Good luck with that. And remember, you owe me a drink for all this unsolicited advice.”
Cyrus chuckled, heading back toward the party. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t get your hopes up.”
Ezra smiled as he followed, hoping his friend would find a way to turn things around.
~~
Cyrus leaned back against the velvet couch in the dimly lit club lounge, the bass of the music thumping in his chest. A girl straddled him, her hands gripping his shoulders, her lips trailing along his neck. His mind was hazy, lost in the mix of alcohol and the girl’s touch, yet something felt off.
He pulled her closer, kissing her hungrily, trying to drown out the nagging thoughts. She responded eagerly, her fingers threading through his hair, her breath hot against his skin. For a moment, he let himself get lost in the sensation, his hands wandering over her back, the heat between them intensifying.
But as her hands slid down his chest, a wave of frustration hit him. This wasn’t right. No matter how much he tried, this girl wasn’t who he wanted. He broke the kiss abruptly, pushing her back.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, breathless and confused.
“Get off,” Cyrus said, his voice flat and devoid of emotion.
“Seriously? Now?” she glared at him, a mixture of annoyance and bewilderment in her eyes.
“Yeah, now. I’m done,” he said, sliding her off his lap.
“Unbelievable,” she muttered, standing up and smoothing her dress before storming away.
Cyrus watched her go, a hollow feeling settling in his chest. He ran a hand through his hair, exhaling sharply. The club’s lights flickered, casting a restless energy around him. He needed to get out.
He left the club, the cool night air hitting his face as he stepped outside. The streets were alive with people, laughter and chatter blending into a background hum. He walked briskly, heading home, his mind racing. The walk did nothing to clear his head. If anything, it made the thoughts louder, more insistent until he got to his car, closing the door angrily.
Once home, he shut the door behind him, leaning against it. The silence of his apartment was deafening. He tossed his jacket aside, pacing restlessly through the rooms. His mind kept drifting back to Selena, no matter how much he fought it.
The memory of her was like a drug he couldn’t quit. Her face, her voice, the way she looked at him-it was all too vivid, too real. He sank onto his bed, rubbing his face, trying to push the thoughts away, but they clung to him stubbornly.
He lay back, staring at the ceiling, the image of Selena’s eyes, her touch, burning into his mind. He could still feel the electric tension from their last encounter, and it frustrated him. He had tried to replace her, to forget her in the arms of others, but it never worked. She was always there, haunting him, making him feel things he didn’t want to feel.
He wanted her-wanted to taste her again, feel her close to him. The thought of pushing her away felt like a mistake, a missed chance. The craving was there, deep and persistent, and he hated himself for it.
Cyrus rolled over, burying his face in his pillow, cursing under his breath. He had tried to run from his feelings, to bury them under a facade of indifference, but Selena had a hold on him that he couldn’t break.
~~
Cyrus walked up to the large house, the evening air cool against his skin. The place was quiet, the kind of silence that suggested everyone was either out or asleep. He opened the door, stepping inside just as Ezra was heading out.
“Hey,” Ezra greeted, looking slightly surprised to see him.
“Hey,” Cyrus replied, trying to keep his tone casual. “You heading somewhere?”
“Yeah, meeting some friends. Everyone else is out, except for Grey and Selena,” Ezra said. “See you later, man.”
“Later,” Cyrus said, watching Ezra leave before letting out a heavy sigh. The isolation of the house felt both a relief and a burden. He knew what he wanted, but he also knew it was trouble.
He headed upstairs, his footsteps echoing softly in the empty hallway. He paused in front of Selena’s door, his heart beating a little faster. Gathering himself, he knocked until he heard her soft voice say, “Come in.”
He pushed the door open, stepping inside to find Selena lying on her bed, her phone in her hand. She was smiling at the screen, her eyes lighting up in a way that made something twist uncomfortably inside him. As he got closer, he saw Marco’s face on the screen, talking animatedly.
Cyrus felt a surge of irritation. He walked up to her, leaning down and kissing her cheek deliberately. Selena’s eyes widened in shock, and she quickly ended the call with Marco, her face turning a deep shade of red.
“What the hell, Cyrus?” she said, sitting up, her expression a mix of surprise and anger.
He straightened, shrugging nonchalantly. “Just saying hi to my favorite girl.”
“Favorite girl? You mean the one you keep messing with?” she shot back, her eyes narrowing.
Cyrus chuckled, though it was tinged with frustration. “Maybe if your ‘lover boy’ wasn’t always in the picture, you’d see things differently.”
Selena glared at him, her cheeks still flushed. “You can’t just come in here and-”
“Relax,” he interrupted, sitting on the edge of her bed. “I was just messing around. Didn’t know you were so sensitive.”
She crossed her arms, clearly not amused. “What do you want, Cyrus?”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I just… I can’t get you out of my head, Selena. It’s driving me crazy.”
She looked at him, her expression softening slightly, but there was still a hard edge to her eyes. “You can’t keep doing this. You can’t just show up and expect me to forget everything you’ve done.”
Cyrus looked away, his jaw tightening. “I know I’ve screwed up, okay? But it doesn’t change what I feel.”
“What you feel?” she echoed, her voice skeptical. “You mean your obsession with having everything your way?”
He met her gaze, something raw and real in his eyes. “Maybe. But it’s more than that. You know it is.”
Selena sighed, looking down at her hands. “You can’t just keep pushing me away and pulling me back. It’s not fair.”
“I know,” he said quietly. “But I can’t help it. You’re the only one I can’t let go of.”
She looked up at him, her eyes searching his face. “Then maybe you need to figure out what you really want, Cyrus. Because this… this isn’t working for either of us.”
He nodded slowly, the weight of her words sinking in. “Maybe you’re right,” he admitted, though the thought of letting her go felt like a knife twisting in his gut.
For a moment, they just sat there in silence, the tension between them heavy and unresolved.
Cyrus leaned back slightly, studying Selena’s conflicted expression. “Want to watch a movie or something?” he asked, trying to lighten the mood.
Selena sighed, looking at him with a mixture of weariness and frustration. “Cyrus, movies aren’t going to fix the issues between us.”
He shrugged, offering a small, almost boyish grin. “It’s just a friendly gesture, nothing else.”
She stared at him for a long moment, weighing his words. Finally, she nodded, a hint of resignation in her eyes. “Fine. But it doesn’t mean everything’s okay.”
“I know,” he said, standing up and heading towards the door. “I’ll leave you to it then.”
Selena blinked, caught off guard. “What?”
He glanced back at her, a serious look crossing his face. “I’ll give you space. Maybe we both need it.”
She watched him go, her heart heavy with the complexity of their situation. As Cyrus disappeared down the hallway, she wondered if things would ever truly be resolved between them.
Cyrus returned to Selena’s room with a bowl of popcorn, setting it down on her bedside table. He reached over to switch off the light, casting a soft glow from her bedside lamp. Selena watched him quietly, unsure of what to make of the situation.
As he settled beside her on the bed, he handed her the remote. “Any preferences on what to watch?” he asked, trying to ease the tension.
She hesitated, still processing everything that had transpired between them. “Something light, maybe,” she finally replied, her voice barely above a whisper.
Nodding in agreement, he took back the remote and then scrolled through her streaming service options until they settled on a romantic comedy. They sat side by side, munching on popcorn, the room filled with the soft glow of the screen and the sound of actors bantering in the background.
For a while, they allowed themselves to be immersed in the movie, a temporary escape from the complexities of their relationship.
Cyrus leaned back on the bed, his gaze fixed playfully on Selena as he nudged her. “So, tell me about your toy,” he teased, a mischievous glint in his eye.
Selena rolled her eyes in mock exasperation, her lips curling into a half-smile. “First off, he’s not a toy,” she replied, her voice laced with a hint of annoyance. “And just because we’re watching a movie together doesn’t mean I have to spill all my life’s secrets to you.”
Cyrus chuckled softly, his smile widening. “Fair enough,” he conceded, his tone light. Then, with a sudden shift in demeanor, he added in a low, suggestive voice, “But you have no idea how much I’d rather be kissing your lips than eating this popcorn.”
Selena’s expression turned serious as she met his gaze, a mixture of disbelief and amusement crossing her features. “You wish,” she retorted, a playful challenge in her voice, before breaking into a grin.
Cyrus leaned closer, his eyes glinting with a mix of challenge and sincerity. “You think I’m bad? Wait until you start dating that guy. He’s going to fuck you
and then dump you. Trust me.”
Selena frowned, her annoyance clear. “And how do you know that? Not everyone is like you, pal.”
“You can ask Reggie about it They’re in the same year, so he knows,” Cyrus replied, his tone casual but with a sharp edge.
Selena’s eyes narrowed, turning back to the movie. “I’m still not going to sleep with you, Cyrus, even if what you’re saying is true.”
Cyrus sighed, his expression softening slightly. “I know what I did was wrong. I should’ve handled things differently. I didn’t expect you to be a-”
“Virgin,” Selena interjected, meeting his gaze head-on.
“Yeah,” Cyrus admitted, looking down for a moment. “The fact that you gave that to me, it messed me up. I kept asking myself what was so special about me. Why me? I’m an asshole. I drink, I smoke-”
“You drink and smoke?” Selena cut in, genuinely surprised. She had always seen him as untouchable, almost perfect.
“Only when I’m angry and pissed at myself,” Cyrus confessed.
Selena shook her head slightly, processing this new side of him. “Well… it might sound weird, but I’ve had a crush on you my whole life. So, when I had the chance to be with you, to feel something real, I took it, hoping you’d feel the same.”
Cyrus nodded slowly, his gaze softening as he listened. “And I was a complete asshole. A very stupid asshole,” he said, managing a small, self-deprecating chuckle. ” I am really sorry”.
Selena’s eyes widened at his admission, caught off guard by his apologies and sincerity “You’re either out of your mind or you’re drunk,” she said, struggling to believe his apology was real.
“To be honest, Lena, I was a fool,” Cyrus said, his voice more serious now. “I didn’t think about your feelings at all.”
“You don’t have to do this,” Selena murmured, her defenses softening a bit.
“But I want to. I’m putting my ego aside and doing what I should have done a long time ago,” Cyrus said earnestly.
Selena took a deep breath, nodding slowly. “It’s going to take a long time to get over it, but… thank you.”
Cyrus offered a tentative smile, feeling the weight between them lift just a little. “I’m really sorry, Selena.”
She returned his smile, a flicker of hope in her eyes. “Okay. Let’s see if you can start making things right.”
Selena smiled back at Cyrus, their eyes locking for a moment that seemed to stretch endlessly. The room was filled with an unspoken tension, a blend of unresolved emotions and lingering desire. Cyrus swallowed hard, feeling an almost irresistible pull towards her.
He shifted closer, his gaze flickering to her lips, but Selena placed a firm hand on his chest, stopping him. “No… we can’t,” she said, her voice soft but resolute.
Cyrus paused, studying her face for a long moment before nodding. “No problem,” he murmured, leaning in to place a gentle peck on her forehead instead.
They both fell silent, the air around them thick with everything left unsaid.
“Should we start from the beginning?” Selena finally asked, referring to the movie that had long since become background noise.
“Yeah,” Cyrus agreed, turning his gaze to the TV, trying to focus on anything but the complicated feelings swirling between them.
As the opening credits rolled again, they settled back into their spots, side by side yet worlds apart, each lost in their own thoughts about what could have been and what might still be.
TBC