The Nexus surrounded me and everything seemed to be a mix of opportunities and options. This simple thought could barely whisper at the periphery of my mind, trying to pull the extremely feeble faded strings of my being apart. Why? Why did I fight so hard to still be me whoever the hell I was?
Behind the madness of a growing beast, the Architect rose in front of me, still and composed. His eyes were dark, and his gaze never strayed from my face as he slowly stalked around me. The physical restraints on my body, however, had been removed; but the force that came from him and The Raven would keep me immobile as any rope or chain ever could.
The man called The Architect looked at me like a confused girl and sighed. Sinking in a pool of broken souls and partial truths. Yes, hope, that is why I can make sense of it all to you Brianne.
I felt like spitting defiance at him and declining the offer flat. But the burden of doubt, the need to separate reality from fantasy in my head was something that kept me from acting.
“Why should I trust you?” I got through it, my words nearly drowned by the noise of the Nexus. “You kidnapped me. You… tortured me maybe”?
This sadness could only be seen when The Architect slightly smiled at whatever comment he had just made to me. This we could not do, and affirmative steps therefore had to be taken, indeed drastic ones. But only to save you and so many others from the pain that you could have inflicted.”
“Damage?” I said furiously, focusing on one word. “What kind of damage?”
He waved at the energies that were swarming in a circle around me. ‘The world is a fragile equilibrium, Brianne. One push in the wrong direction, one moment changed or deleted, and the result is very different from what you might have expected. Your power was unchecked and was used for illicit purposes that threatened that balance of power. And not to talk about all the setbacks you brought for The Phoenix Organization.
I shook my head, in an attempt to try and clear up my mind. I meant no ill will when I heard the news. I was trying to help people. To save lives and, most importantly, to save my life.’
“Were you?” The Architect inquired, quizzically. Otherwise, is that what you were told to think? By those with whom you believe they are in cahoots?
I shivered hearing the words from his mouth. “What do you mean?”
The Raven, who had never spoken at all up to this point, spoke for the first time. Some people who are around you are not friends with you, pointed at Brianne. Some even have their own personal interests, have their own reasons for interesting you to seize your power.
I thought of Chase, of Alessandro, of my parents, both of them, and my heart broke for all the times I wasted when I could have been with him. The human beings who had been there for me, who had stood by me through this insane endeavor. “No,” I said firmly. “You’re wrong. I trust them. They’ve only ever gotten involved just to assist me with something.
The Architect glanced at The Raven, which was enough of communication between them. “So, we will look at that, will we?” he said, turning back to me. Describe to me your friend, Brianne. According to the people in whom you have such confidence.
Nevertheless, I was forced to speak. As if there was an external force pulling the words out of me every time. I have known Chase for quite some time now. We are friends. He’s brilliant, dedicated. He has always been by my side and what was going on with me for the longest time I could not comprehend. It was as if the accident brought us closer.
The Architect smiled and nodded, in approval of all that Saffron had said so far. “What was Chase’s response when you first began suffering from… inconsistency?” The adobe was as alien and disposable; when it faded, there would be glimpses of another existence: “Other lives? Other worlds?”
I frowned, thinking back. Even he… even he would have thought that it was too good to be true at one point. I thought it could be stress or some sort of mental snap. But he came around. He believed me.”
“Did he?” The Raven interjected softly. “Or instead he was just saying what you wanted to hear”?
He follows the evidence.”
‘What did this man have as evidence?’ The Architect pressed. “Other than your word?”
“And isn’t it funny that that was when he seduced you, and you had an intense moment. Wasn’t that strange?”
I was shocked. How did he know ?
I wanted to say something, but nothing came out at first and so my mouth just remained open. In fact, I realized for the first time that Chase himself never actually witnessed me utilizing my… powers. Of the other realities which I saw. He had taken it all on faith.
Realizing that I seemed to be in doubt, The Architect went on to explain. “And what about Alessandro? This strange person who you were supposed to get married to ?
“Alessandro has been nothing but helpful,” I continued to defend him, knowing fully well that we had gone through a lot. “He has been there for me as a friend ” I kept quiet even though I knew what he wanted, and I never gave him a chance.
“Has he?” The Raven asked. Instead, has he taken you right to where he wanted you to be? ‘Can he quickly introduce himself into situations that served his purposes?
I recalled that time and time again Alessandro had materialized out of thin air as if by magic at the precise moment when I found myself requiring particular information or help. It had appeared to be so fortunate earlier when it actually…
‘You’re trying to confuse me,’ I said, and the words, even to my shame, came out rather weak. “To make me doubt everyone & everything.”
The tone of the Architect was soft when he spoke. OMG! WTF? We’re only trying to open your eyes, Brianne. To come to terms with the fact that the world the multiverse is far removed from what you’ve been made to believe it is. Criticizing the idea that those who you consider your friends might actually have their own selfish interests.
Shaking my head slightly, I started to try to push the thoughts that were now slowly seeping into my mind. “My parents,” I said, quite desperately. “They have no agenda. They just want me safe.”
“Oh yeah?” The Raven asked me in an almost condescending manner. “Your parents. Honesty? The ones who raised you, who love you and would never lie to you. You know Brianne, did you ever ask yourself why you do not remember your childhood before a certain age?
I jerked my head as a sudden question was asked. “I… what?”
Think,” The Architect urged. “Really think. What is the first time in which you have a clear recollection of your parents? Of your home?”
I shut my eyes tight and attempted to concentrate. But the more I tried to recall these thoughts the more I felt they were escaping me. Something incomplete a giggle, a touch, the aroma of hot food, but no substance. Again, I could not locate anything that I could be sure of.
“This doesn’t prove anything,” I said, but my heart was pounding. “Many individuals have poor memories of their infancy”.
“Alright,” said The Architect. “But most people don’t have the ability to alter reality, change it in its most basic form.” Superposition is the most basic of the concepts, and it should be clear to most people that they aren’t that special, that they are the one that keeps the multiverse intact.
With everything that was happening at that moment, it seemed to me that I was in deep water and my solid ground was falling apart. “Why are you doing this?” I demanded. “Why do you attempt to put my mind into uncertainty over everything and everybody?”
Looking at me with burning desire, the Raven approached me, his eyes pitch black. I smiled, “Well, because doubt is the beginning of wisdom, Brianne.” That is why the proverbial is applicable, stating that it is only possible to understand the truth if you start doubting the given facts.
“And what is the truth?” I asked, although it half filled me with dread of the reply.
The Architect put both of his hands out. “That’s for you to discover. We can’t just explain it to you your own brain, however intelligent you may be, will discard information that does not fit into its paradigm. Many times you grow into these conclusions on your own.”
I laughed bitterly. Rather, what the speaker is saying is, I can’t trust my friends, I can’t trust my family members and I cannot even trust my own memories. What’s left?”
I looked at him and nodded, “You know what The Raven said to me once, ‘Trust your intuition’.” “Trust the power within you. It has the answer pretty well anyway, even though your ego is not yet aware of it.
Suddenly, the memory of that force I danced with in the park enraptured me. It had felt right, somehow. Natural. Like I was awakening a part of me that I had known and lived with all my life.
“I’m not certain how,” was my response I replied softly.
The Architect nodded, as if I was supposed to answer that way. “It will come on time. As you open yourself up to it, you diminish what has been inhibiting your mind. And don’t worry, here you will discover things you never dreamed of discovering. He had a smirk on
“And if I don’t want to?” I challenged. “If I decide to believe my friends, my family, after everything you’ve told me?”
The Raven and The Architect shared one of those complicated looks again. “Then you endanger not only your life,” The Raven sighed deeply, “but the math of everything you know.”
He wanted something to do, and I wanted to argue for the sake of arguing, to tell them that they were wrong. But the seed of doubt had been sown there, and I could see it germinating inside of me. Each communication, each conversation with my supposed friends, my supposed comrades, now appeared to be saturated with the possibility of subterfuge.
“Yes, “I said finally,” I need time.” “To think. To… process all of this.”
The Architect nodded. “Of course. So, the best thing to do at the moment is to keep laying down the groundwork of the Phoenix Organization as time is something we have in plenty here. He took a brief pause before continuing almost nonchalantly with, “Finally, there is one more question regarding all that I have explained to you that I would like you to think about.”
I looked at him warily. “What’s that?”
He stared me down with such intensity that I felt like I wanted to look down. But I looked him straight in the eyes, and prepared myself for what sort of revelation or accusation he could make.
“If they were young I would like to hear their opinion on what they assume might have befallen Lucy”.
My mind started to race. How did he even know about this?
The question struck me as a physical blow: Lucy.
The name called up affection, concern, guilt, but in those feelings no memory convened. Who was Lucy? Why did this emptiness fill me when I heard my name on his lips for the first time?
I tried to look for something to say, something that would make the light of this new piece in the increasingly complicated puzzle of my life go out, when I saw something glint in The Architect’s eyes. Satisfaction? Pity? I couldn’t be sure.
One thing was certain: no matter what had befallen both Brianne and Lucy, we were the answer to… everything. My broken thoughts, my friends, or… my real self all depended on this stranger I once was.
With the Phoenix Organization surrounding the constantly expanding and contracting space around me, and for the first time, I sensed looming in front of me a great, horrifying essay. So I was aware that, once I’d crossed that bridge, once I solved the mystery of Lucy and everything, life would change irreversibly for the worse.
The question echoed in my mind, a haunting refrain that I knew would give me no peace until I found the answer:
What happened to Lucy?