“Oh no. I’ve already turned your room into a sauna. And your grandfather is using Gabriel’s to practise taxidermy on roadkill to sell at the fair. We could use the extra money.”
“GRAMMY!” Jade yells over her laughter. She cocks her head at me and I get up obediently, following her through the house and up the stairs. “Guess what?” she whispers to me as she turns into a small bedroom.
“What?”
“I never had any boys over when I was living here.”
“Well, I never, Jade Sinclair. I thought a girl like you would’ve had them lining up to hold boomboxes over their head to declare love for you.”
“No, I was waiting for your boombox, Kaine.”
“It’s all yours, sweetness.”
I look around the room. I imagine it still looks exactly as it did when Jade lived here. There are school awards and yearbooks and high school memorabilia on a small shelf on one side, and pictures of her growing up on another.
Next to her bedside is a single photo frame of a pretty woman, with a striking resemblance to the woman standing next to me.
I sit down on the bed and motion for her to join me. She nudges my legs apart and settles on my lap.
“Is this your mother?” I ask her, gesturing to the photo.
“Yep. She’s beautiful, isn’t she?”
“Yes. You two look so alike.”
“No, she was really pretty,” her voice is wistful as her eyes soften, resting on the smiling face in the picture.
“And you are simple stunning. You look just like her, Jade.”
She reaches over and traces the edge of the photo frame with her finger.
“Do you, do you think the reason I became a genealogist is because in some way I’m looking for my own lost family?”
I look at her, and I know my answer is important, not just off the top of my head. So, I give her the question the time it deserves. And then I tell her what the answer was always going to be anyway.
“No, sweetness, I don’t.”
“No?”
“I think you know exactly where family is, every moment of every day.”
“Where?”
“There,” I point at her chest.
“Not my tit, again,” she jokes, and playfully nudged me with her elbow.
“Close. But, no. These people, your grandparents, your brother, your mother. They’re not just in pictures frames, in Harrisonburg, in rehab clinics. They’re there, in your heart, always. Just remember that when you miss them. And you know what?”
“What?”
“You’re in theirs.”
She sighs and rests her head against my shoulder.
“So, no. I don’t think that’s why you chose to follow a career in genealogy. I think it’s because you treasure your experiences with family so much, that you want to help others find theirs.”
“You know, when I first met you, your first words to me were, ‘you’re going to be okay.'”
“Yeah?”
“But then after, your words were mainly made up of variations of ‘go away, Jade.'”
“I’m not sure where this is going is going to be a good place for me.”
“I just thought you should know, you’re much better with words now,” she grins at me.
“I’m learning! How’s this – wanna fuck?” I lean over and kiss her neck.
“Sure,” she purrs.
“Why, Miss Sinclair, I do believe we’re about to take the virginity of this bedroom.”
“On second thought, maybe not,” she pulls away.
“Why?”
“Because I’m guessing, if I could hear my grandparents in their bedroom, they’ll probably be able to hear us in mine,” she says, screwing up her face.
“Oh my God, I’m never going to be able to look Grampy in the eye again.”
“Well, you better, I doubt they’d appreciate you staring elsewhere.”
“Ruined. You’ve ruined the Gramps for me, forever,” I shake my head.
“Hey, don’t scoff, if they weren’t so randy, there wouldn’t be me.”
“Okay. You’re right. But let’s get out of here before we give Gramps a reason to not look me in the eye.”
She pulls me to my feet and I wait at the door as she takes one last look around.
HER
“You remember to FaceSnaptime me, you hear?” my grandmother says, her voice muffled in my shoulder.
“Um, you mean Faceti-… never mind. Yes, I promise to call you, with my face and everything, Grammy. I love you so much,” I tell her, grabbing her hands tight in mine.
“Hey, does he have a grandfather?” she says, gesturing her head in Kaine’s direction.
“Why?” I ask, looking at her then at Grampy.
“Well, your grandfather’s not gettin’ any younger,” she grins.
“You hear that?” my grandfather tuts, his eyes laughing. “So, do you, sonny, have my replacement all lined up?”
I glance at Kaine and for the first time since we arrived, there’s a tension behind his eyes, and a muscle tightening along his jaw. I reach out and run a hand down his arm and he jumps, as if startled. “Grampy asked you a question, honey,” I nudge him.
“It’s okay, I’m sure you have other things on your mind, being a big shot billionaire,” Grampy teases Kaine.
“No, I’m so sorry, just a little tired. Your granddaughter here is a handful.”
“Yes, but it looks like you’ve got just the hands to handle her, sonny.” Grampy holds his hand out to Kaine, who adopts a look of mock horror. He doesn’t hold it for long though before breaking out into a grin and lets Grampy hug him again.
“You take care of her, okay?”
“Yes, sir. You have my word.”
I give them one last wave and run out to the car, not wanting to look back in case I can’t leave. I get in the car and roll the window down, blowing kisses as the car starts and drives away. The image of them under the porch light and setting sun burns deep into my mind.
The window slides back up and I sit there staring out of it, contemplating the day.