***
Present Day Gerry.
Gerry Baxter, the man behind my downfall.
The Baxter that triggers my anxiety and reminds me about every mistake I ever made.
What is he doing here?
I move to close the door in his face but he stops it, sticking his foot inside my club. Like a slug, he drags his eyes over my body making me feel even more exposed than I actually am. My arms wrap around my body, trying to hide it from him. But is there really any point? He’s seen it all before.
“What do you want, Gerry?” I ask, my voice teetering on the tightrope between fear and anger.
He smirks, enjoying my obvious discomfort. “Well, I’ve been trying to call you, sweetheart. Call, text, email… but you haven’t responded. I was getting worried about you.”
“Well, I’m fine.” No thanks to you, you slimy fuck. “You can go now.”
He edges his foot further inside, opening the door wider. “We haven’t really had a chance to catch up at all. Do you really want to do it here, in front of everyone? Dressed the way you are? Especially considering that you’re about to be announced to be engaged to my nephew. Again. To a different one this time. Imagine my surprise when I heard the news. I thought you and I were in this together. So, invite me in and I’m going to make this as quick and as painless as possible.” I step aside.
Because that’s what I want.
All this to be over.
Quickly.
I couldn’t care less about the painless.
I close the door behind him, checking the curtains for any gaps.
“Make it quick, Gerry.”
“I have plenty of time. You can tell me what you’ve been up to since the last time I saw you wearing only my shirt.”
I want to throw up, and it has nothing to do with my hangover. I never, ever want to think about that night ever again, or anything that came after it. Not the plan to blackmail Damien, not the deals we made with each other, not that drunken night, not the aligning with the most disgusting excuse for a man I’ve ever known.
How Gerry can come from the same stock as the other Baxters will never cease to amaze me. While the Baxter boys, their father and grandfather, are intelligent, hardworking, talented, Gerry is nothing but a snake in the grass waiting for an unsuspecting ankle passing by.
And I was that ankle, desperate, stupid. So stupid.
“Get to the point or get out,” I shout. I certainly don’t have to worry about being a bitch to Gerry.
He pins me with a smug look. “Well, I happened to be in New York, and it’s a good thing too, since a very interesting memo came across my desk. You and Matthias. Well, color me surprised. So, after all this time, it looks like you are still working at getting revenge against the family after all. And all without me. I’m hurt, sweetheart.”
I can never ever hear the word “sweetheart” without wanting to gag. “I’m not getting revenge. This isn’t what this is about.”
He leans in, his overpowering cologne choking me. “I don’t believe you, Clarissa. You forget, I know you. I also remember me being there for you through all of it. Comforting you. Giving you everything that my nephew had not. My time. My bed…”
“Stop! Please. just stop. Just tell me what you want!”
My stomach churns, I need him to leave. I cannot have Matthias coming back while Gerry’s here.
Knowing the way they all feel about their uncle, I don’t know if Gerry will make it out alive.
“Oh, I just wanted to remind you who was your friend when no one else was, and that maybe one day, I’m going to need you to return the favor. Because the only thing that’s important is the best thing for Baxter Enterprises. And that, I think we can all agree, is me.”
He has no shame. I guess that’s easy if you don’t have a conscience.
“Anyway, I’ll let you get back to your fiancee duties. I do remember how you were so good at that. And next time? I suggest you answer my calls. I’d hate to think what would happen if everyone found out how you’re making it through the family. Sure, they know about Damien and Matthias… but what about me?”
I grab my stomach, I’m going to be sick. But he’s not done yet.
“All this could go away, if you choose the Baxter man you’re supposed to be with, sweetheart. Me.” He opens the door and leaves, humming a tune under his breath.
I grab the wastebasket behind the hostess’s desk and heave.
And wonder if I’ll ever be able to repent for my past.
MATTHIAS
I
don’t hear from my brothers after I storm away from the apartment. Or rather, I have no idea if I hear from them or not. I didn’t answer my phone, I didn’t even look at it once Clarissa showed up
at the club.
I wanted to make it clear to Clarissa that we’re in this together. That there is something real between us, and my family’s ire isn’t going to stop me finding out what that is.
But you can’t hide from reality forever, and when I leave to get some food for Clarissa, I check my phone to see more than fifty messages and voicemails waiting for me.
Good.
They deserve to stew. I’m not sure I’m even ready to hear what they have to say now.
Being unplugged gave me time to spend with her, focus only on her. And for a little while, we were without inhibitions, without the baggage of the past, without answering to anyone and anything. And it had been the most fun I’d had in as long as I can remember.
She is intelligent, smart as a whip, with a sting just as fatal. She can talk on any topic I bring up, sometimes to test her knowledge, sometimes just wanting to know what she thinks about things. She took to business fast, probably helped by growing up in a family with a fortune of almost 80 million dollars and being twice engaged to my brother. She might not have sat in on board meetings, but she’d listened and learned. And now was using it to run her business.