“You don’t look good.” My fingers circle the keys in my pocket and make them jangle anxiously.
“Shit, thanks, Jas.
“I mean, you look beautiful,” I say quickly, wincing as I notice her eyes widen. You are always. But you don’t seem… happy.
He blinks slowly and frowns slightly.
“Is that supposed to be better?” Beautiful and unhappy?
God. I’m screwing up. I run a hand through my hair.
-You are happy? Does it make you happy?
Her jaw drops, and I know I’m going out of line, or messing around, or whatever. But someone has to ask him, and I doubt anyone has.
I need to hear her say it.
His pale cheeks flush and his eyes narrow as he approaches me, his jaw tense.
“Are you asking me this now ?”
I snort and run my upper teeth across my lower lip, my eyes completely fixed on his blue ones, so wide and pale and sparkling with indignation.
-Yeah. Has anyone else asked you?
He releases his gaze from me and plants his hands on his cheeks before pushing them back through his blonde hair to his collarbone.
-No one has asked me.
The teeth of my house key dig into the palm of my hand.
-How did you meet Sterling?
My father introduced us. His eyes focus on the black sky. There are no stars, not like on the ranch, where you can see every last ray of light. Everything in town seems polluted compared to Chestnut Springs. I decide on the spot to drive home to the country tonight rather than spend another night breathing the same air as Sterling Woodcock.
-How do you know him?
His eyes meet mine.
Sterling’s father is a new partner of his. He’s focused on making new connections now that he’s back in town.
-And how long have you known this guy?
His tongue comes out from between his lips.
We met in June.
-Five months ? I arch my brow and step back. If they seemed madly in love, I would believe it, but…
“Don’t judge me, Jasper! -His eyes shine and he approaches again. He may dwarf her in height, but he is not in the least intimidated. Right now she’s furious. Angry with me. But I think it’s because he trusts me enough to vent, and I’m fine with him doing that. I’m happy to be that person for her.
His voice shakes when he adds, “You have no idea the pressures I live with.”
Without a second thought, I pull her towards me and wrap my arms around her narrow shoulders.
She is tense and nervous. I swear I can almost feel it vibrating.
“I’m not judging you, Sunny.
Apparently, now is not the time for childish nicknames.
-Do not call me that way. -His voice breaks as he rests his forehead on my chest, as always, and I slide the palm of my hand through his hair until I touch the base of his skull.
As usual.
I idly wonder what Sterling would say if he came out right now. There’s a mean part of me that wants me to.
“I’m just curious how things happened so quickly. I’m curious because I haven’t met him until now. -My voice is quiet, all gravel, almost drowned out by the sound of the cars that rush past us.
“Well, it’s not like I have much free time with ballet. And it’s not like you’ve been in touch lately either.
I feel guilty and my chest tightens. Our team was coming off a bad season and I promised myself to train harder than ever during the offseason.
He trained and lived in Chestnut Springs. “That’s not a lie.” My brother’s fiancee opened a big gym there, and I didn’t see any reason to spend the summer in the city. And then training camp came, and I was swept up.
It’s also true.
The lie is that he was too busy to spend time on it. I could have spent time on it. But I did not. Because I knew his father was back in town, and I avoided him at all costs. And the announcement of their engagement gutted me in a way I never saw coming.
“I should have told you, not blurted it out the way I did,” he murmurs, and I erase from my memory the memory of Violet spilling the news about Sloane’s engagement at the ranch just a few months ago. The way I instantly froze inside. The way my heart fell into my stomach with a loud thud.
I ran a hand over her head and squeezed her shoulders, trying to avoid the warm bare skin of her back, and answered, “I should have asked.” It’s just that I’ve been… busy. I didn’t think all this in your life would happen so quickly. -And that part is true.
Her body relaxes in my arms, her soft breasts press against my ribs while her fingers dig into my back. But only for a moment before separating. The hug lasted long enough that it was more of a hug. I was going too far.
But I still want to attract her again.
-Well yes. She looks down and brushes the sleeve of her pale green dress, silky and shiny in the gloomy light. My father and I agreed that it was better to move forward with the fall wedding rather than extend it.
That comment has set my teeth on edge because the mere mention of Robert Winthrop gets on my nerves. And that he participates in her decision to marry sets off all the alarms.
-Because? -My brow furrows. I should know it. I should stay away. I should let her be happy. It shouldn’t bother me so much. If he really seemed happy, I wouldn’t be.
Or maybe yes.
She waves a hand and looks over her shoulder toward the restaurant, exposing her elegant neck.
“Multiple factors,” he responds with a defeated shrug. It’s like he knows his time with me is ending. I don’t get the feeling that Sterling is going to be the kind of husband who’s okay with her and me being friends.
-Factors? Like you can’t wait to be Mrs. Woodcock ? Because nobody wants that as a last name. Or is it your father who pressures you?
His blue eyes light up at the mention of his father because Sloane doesn’t see him as a snake. He has never seen it. She’s too busy being the perfect daughter… and now fiancee. One that is good on paper and does not go hunting.
“So what if it is?” I’m twenty eight years old. My best years of dancing are coming to an end. I need to settle down, come up with a life plan. He’s taking care of me.
I huff out an agitated laugh and shake my head at him.
-Where is the wild girl I remember? The girl who danced in the rain and crawled onto the roof so I wouldn’t have to be alone on bad nights?