I was caught off guard and didn’t know what to say as Joey walked into the room, closing the door. When he saw my confused look, he immediately stood up tall, ready for whatever was about to happen. I heard my mom take a big breath in before slowly letting it out.
Grandma had a heart attack, sweetie, and it’s not looking too good, she whispered and once my brain connected what she had just said, my entire body went numb and I didn’t even realize I was falling over until Joey caught me.
I got you, it’s alright, he whispered, setting me down in his desk chair as my brain ran through hundreds of thoughts as Joey kneeled in front of me, setting his hands on my knees to bring me a sense of stability and balance.
Wait, what ? But Grandma is so… she’s… I tried to say, but my mom interrupted me again.
I know, sweetie, I know. These things happen when we least expect it to, she whispers and Joey kissed the side of my head before getting up to put some clothes and other things into a bag in a rush.
Mom… I whispered, trying my best to remain calm and not to panic.
I know, was all she said before she told me the name of the hospital and we ended the conversation before hanging up. My hand went limp and the phone smacked onto the floor as I searched the room for Joey and heard him still rummaging in the closet.
J-Joey… I whisper and he instantly walks out of the closet to come over to me. He wraps his arms around me as I sat there in shock at what was just told to me. I didn’t know what to do or what to say or how to react. I just sat there limp in his arms as he whispered soft things into my ear.
Let me get us some clothes and then we can leave, okay ? He whispered, cupping my face with his hands. I nodded, even though I couldn’t process what he had just told me.
A few minutes later, he had a backpack swung over his shoulder before rushing out of the room and I heard a few gasps as Joey must’ve been telling everyone what was going on. I could hear their panic as they asked if I was okay and if there was anything they could do. I pushed them out of a memory as I felt numb. Broken. Terrified.
Soon, I was sitting in the passenger seat of his car as we were on the way to the hospital. I hadn’t let go of his hand since he had set it on my knee when he first started driving. The GPS had told us that we were about 20 minutes away and I texted my mom to tell her and said that they were doing some tests at the moment.
She’s going to die, I just know it, I whisper, squeezing his hand.
He didn’t say anything because what could he say right now ? He couldn’t say that everything was going to be alright because we were told that it was a bad situation and there was a good possibility of everything being terrible once we get to the hospital.
We were silent the whole ride of the hospital as he tried not to speed, but also tried to speed at the same time. I mostly kept my eyes on the GPS, watching the number of minutes tick down until it said one minute when I sat up with a long sigh before pushing my hair out of my face.
Once he put the car in park, he opened up his door, but I pulled his arm to get him to look at me which made him close it again. Are you okay ?
C-can we take a minute ? I whispered, staring down at my feet as a feeling of dread ran through my whole body.
Yeah, yeah, of course. Come here, he said, moving the center console since it was a middle seat since we had taken his truck to the hospital. I moved over to be next to him and let him just hold me for a few minutes until I felt the courage to move out of the car.
He helped me out since there was a kinda big step from the truck and the ground. I wobbled my way through the front entrance to the elevator since we have to get to floor four, which was the cardiac wing. While on the elevator, my heart was beating out of my chest and I had to grip Joey’s hand as tight as I possibly could as the other people on the elevator murmured to each other. Once the elevator doors open, I saw my mother standing by the wall that was right across from us with a puffy face from crying. Once she saw us, her face falls as I make my way over to her and pull her into a hug as Joey stood behind me.
My mom held me for a few minutes as we both tried to stall at the situation that was before us in the room a few steps away.
Kade’s POV
When I was little, my grandmother took care of me. She was my second mom, my rock, my savior. I remember whenever my cousins and I would fight, I would go to her since my mom usually took the older ones’ word before mine. My grandmother would always hold me when I cried and make sure I was alright. She would never let me leave without having her cook my favorite meal for me. She was always there for me, but when she needed me the most, I wasn’t there.
I sat next to her bed, staring at her face with both of my hands clasped around hers. She looked so peaceful in her sleep. I didn’t even care if my whole family saw the tears that were freely flowing down my face because all I cared about was her knowing that I was there for her in her final moments.
The doctors said that her heart was too weak to withstand the treatments she would have to go through to fix it. She was only alive right now because of the intubation tube in her throat that was breathing for her. My grandmother is going to die today. The same person that held me when my cousins were talking about how being gay was a sin. She stood up for me and had my back when I thought that I would be standing alone.
I set my forehead on the bed next to her sleeping figure and silently sobbed. I knew Joey was thinking about comforting me, but he knew that when I was angry, I couldn’t stand to be touched. I looked up with puffy eyes and wet cheeks.
I wasn’t there, I whisper, my voice breaking slightly.
What do you mean ? Joey whispers to me, kneeling next to my chair and I reached one hand out to place it on his shoulder to balance myself.
When I was born, she was there for me up until this point, but I was never there for her, I whisper and his eyes softened as he shakes his head.
Kade, you were there for her. You weren’t literally, but you texted her every morning. You called her on the weekends. You went over there to see her. You were there for her. You even went to her last doctor’s appointment. She only ever talked fondly of you and of how much you were always there for her, Dad told me.
That’s when I heard the voice of the person that spent every day for 43 years with my grandmother ; my grandfather.
She talked about you every day, his croak voice said.
I looked at her hand. The way she would always hold it when times got rough, letting me cry into her shoulder. The way she always knew exactly what to say to make the situation better. I fidgeted with her hands while my grandfather talked to focus on something other than just his words.
She always talked about how proud of you she was. Whenever she went to a reunion with her school or her friends, she would always bring you and Emilie up since you were the only grandchildren she talked to, he chuckled. She said you were strong, Kade. She said every day that she was proud of you. I thought I would get sick of hearing it, but I didn’t because I am proud of you too.
He looked over at my sister. She was amazed by you, Emilie. She said that you did exactly what you were supposed to and worked hard at everything you did. She was proud of how mature you were at such a young age. We are both so incredibly proud of you. You stand up for what you believe in and we admire that.