I’m aware of the scars that decorated my body. Belts and fists would do that, especially if you weren’t allowed to clean themright away. Cassie hated when he forced me to wait and bleed. On one occasion, one of the cuts from his belt had gotten infected and I’d nearly died. I think he was trying to kill me. Rage had been there when I passed out, so I’d been given courses of antibiotics and at Rage’s insistence, round-the-clock doctor’s care. My dad was pissed at that one.
I then realized that I didn’thave much of a choice. Even if I wanted to die, there were people in the club who were determined that I live, so that’s exactly what I did. I survived.
Sophie tutted at me as she left thechanging rooms, but I didn’t care. Of course, the spiteful bitch had gotten clothes that were too small for me. Yes, I was a larger woman. My dad had tried many times to starve me, but again, I found a way of stealing or hiding food. I squeezed my body into the clothes and stepped out.
Ive glaredthe moment he saw me and called Sophie over to him. There was a moment of silence and then he snapped his fingers. I’d seen Ive pissed off. When I was his captive, he’d been pissed about having me in his place. He hated that he had to take care of me and force me to eat. He didn’t like me being pissed off, and told me it was in my best interests to be good. I had no idea I was going to end up being his wife. Right before my eyes, I saw part of my husband’s cruelty. He yelled at her, called her a fucking bitch and a slut, useless, and he even forced her to kneel at my feet. “You better beg her for forgiveness.”
“Ive, don’t,” I said.
“You do not disrespect my wife. You did this on purpose, didn’t you? You useless cunt. Now, I suggest you go and get Cathy, and tell her that you are to be fired immediately, and she is to come and take care of my wife.”
Sophie whimpered. “Please, Ive, please, don’t.”
He grabbed her by the back of the neck, lifted her onto her feet, andthen shoved her out of my way.
Wrapping myarms around my waist, I felt sick to my stomach. I couldn’t believe what I had just seen.
Ive returned seconds later and shook his head. “Take those clothes off.”
I didn’t move a muscle.
“You didn’t have to dothat,” I said.
Ive stopped, put his hands on his waist, and glanced up and down at me. “You’re my wife, Charlotte. You are Mrs. Yahontov. You are a bride of a Brigadier of the Volkov Bratva. What she did was try to disrespect you. She knows what size you need.” He took a step toward me, and I was frozen to the spot.
Why wasn’t I afraid of him? I’d just watched him with Sophie, but he’d not hurt her, not really. Yes, he’d humiliated her, which had been awful to see.
Ive didn’t touch me.
“Look at me, Charlotte.”
I tilted my head back and looked into those blue eyes again. There was no coldness looking back at me.
“You do not accept anything less than the best. You are my wife, you are to be respected at all times. No one is to ever harm you. Do you understand me? No one is to speak shit to you. If they so much as glare at you, you tell me.”
“You glare at me all the time,” I said.
“I’m your husband, I’m allowed to.” He took a step back. “Now, go and remove those clothes. Cathy will deal with you.”
It didn’t take long for Cathy to arrive. She apologized profusely and then took the clothes back to wherever Sophie had gotten them. She returned with the appropriate sizes. Again, I did ask her to leave so I could get dressed.
“I am so sorry about my colleague,”she said. “It will never happen again.”
“She had a crush on Ive,” I said
Cathy opened her mouth and closed it. Staring at the woman, I frowned. “What is it?” I asked.
I thought my curiosity into trivial matters had died many years ago.
“Sophie had hoped that Ive was becoming fond of her.”
“Did they date?” I asked.
“I believe there was one date between them, that’s all.” Cathy bowed her head and left the changing room.
I shouldn’t be surprised. Ive was a good-looking man. Thick, blond hair, he had the boy next door look, but with a few scars and a lot of ink. Okay, he was thebadboy next door, but he was sexy and dangerous.
Pushing those thoughts to the back of my mind, I changed into each different outfit and walked out, giving a twirl for Ive. He nodded his head. Shook his head. But he looked completely bored.
After stepping into a summer dress, I did something I hadn’t done in a very long time. I looked into the mirror, and the truth was, I didn’t like what I saw. I didn’t know if people would see me as ugly. I knew I was bland. I didn’t have full lips or smoky eyes. I was dull, mousy maybe. I had big tits and large hips. My waist was small, but I think in the wrong clothes, it made my hips look almost cartoonish with the size difference.
Cassie was beautiful.
Sophie was beautiful.
I hated the tears that came to my eyes. I could imagine on that one date with Sophie, Ive didn’t hesitate in takingher to bed. He was my husband but he didn’t want to sleep with me. Wrapping my arms around myself, I had to wonder who would. I was the wrong choice. The mistake. They wanted Cassie, not me. She’s the one who should be married. Why hadn’t they left me to die when they had the chance? My stomach swirled with sickness. I hated this.
Stepping out of the changing rooms, I gave a twirl and waited for the nod of the head.
Ive gave a nod, and I continued to change, until we got to the evening gowns. I lost interest and didn’t even pay attention to which one he liked. Cathy took note of each one. As for me, I wasmerely the ugly doll. Something for him to use because Ivan had forced him. The only reason he had me with him today was because Ivan had forced it.
No one ever wanted me. I was always the burden.
And that was why it was easier to throw me away. Like trash.
Always freaking trash.
Ive