He gave me a curious look. “I wasn’t trying to upset you.”
I took a deep breath. “Then you shouldn’t be throwing blind accusations.”
“You’re good for him. I can tell you’re strong. He needs that.”
“James is stronger than you give him credit for. He’s overcome so much. A lot of which he wouldn’t have had to if it weren’t for you and your wife.”
Jon smiled. “Even if he is strong, it’s nice to know you have his back. That you’ll fight for him. In our own way, that’s what we were trying to do for him when he was younger. We made some mistakes, of course. I realize that. I want to make it better. I want to fix it.”
I didn’t say anything to that. He wanted to fix it. Just like I had wanted to fix it. But it wasn’t up to us, it was up to James.
“And I don’t doubt that he was a great professor.”
“Why are you saying these things to me instead of him?”
“He wouldn’t listen to me. James doesn’t give second chances.”
“That’s not true. He’s given me more chances than I can count.”
“Maybe only to the people in his life that he loves then.”
“If he doesn’t love you, it’s only because he thinks you don’t love him. He’s incredibly defensive.”
“He gets that from his mother.”
“Ugh.” Shit. I had not meant to say that out loud. “I mean…”
Jon laughed. “It’s fine. She is his mother, though. She always said she knew what was best. Maybe you’ll understand when you’re a parent. You want what you think is best for your children.”
“I think happiness is the most important thing.”
He nodded his head. “You’re right. Happiness is the most important thing.” He paused and stared out into the other room. “You see what it’s like to defy her. It’s easier to let her have her way. I’ve been taking the easy way out my whole life. I let her direct my family’s lives and mine long enough, though.”
“Maybe try taking James’ side sometimes. He needs that.”
He was quiet for a moment as he stared out into the other room. “Fifteen years ago, I decided to get divorced. I realized my life was built on the wrong foundation. There was no happiness, as you put it. Our house was filled with tension. It didn’t feel like a home. Our children did everything they could to be away. We were all miserable. But I didn’t want to abandon my family. I didn’t want to cop out. It seemed unfair to leave them to suffer and for me to get to escape. Especially when I had helped make our home toxic. When I had sat back and done nothing to make it a real home. I failed as a father. I realize that. I went to my lawyer to file the necessary paperwork, but I couldn’t do it. I stayed, but it didn’t make anything better. I just suffered alongside of my children. I was hard on James because in reality, I wasn’t strong. I wanted him to be better than me. I’ve always wanted what was best for him. But me staying made me an even worse father. I was hard on all my kids. I took it out on them.” He shook his head. “I finally filed the papers with my lawyer this morning. Susan doesn’t know. None of my children know. I want to make all of this better. I spent 15 years being a coward. I have a lot to make up for, I realize that. But I’m going to start trying.”
James was so much like his father. They both carried the weight of the world on their shoulders. They suffered to make others happy. “Why are you telling me this?”
“To show you how much I do care about my family. I love all of my children. And I want to be a part of your lives. Right now you’re the closest to giving me grandchildren.” He gave me a playful smile that reminded me so much of James.
I laughed. “Not that close. We’re going to wait awhile.”
“It’s good to take the time to enjoy each other.” He opened up the fridge and grabbed a juice box. “You know, my wife never allowed these in the house.”
“I know.” I smiled as I watched him drink from the tiny straw. “You need to tell James everything you just told me. He needs to hear it from you.”
“Hear what from him?” James walked through the doorway and wrapped his arm protectively around my waist. “You okay?”
I glanced at Jon. “I’m great. But I think you two need to talk.” I stepped away from James’ arm and smiled up at him.
“You found yourself a great girl,” Jon said.
James’ eyes left mine and he lowered both his eyebrows.
That was probably my cue to leave. “Thanks, Jon.”
James folded his arms across his chest as I left them alone. He was already closing himself off. I hoped he’d listen to his dad. Maybe they could fix this. I hoped that they could.
Friday
Most everyone had left by the time I walked back into the living room. The bridal party had moved to the couches and they were all laughing about something. I collapsed between Melissa and Bee.
“I’m officially exhausted,” I said.
Bee laughed. “But our slumber party hasn’t even started yet!”
I sighed and put my head on Melissa’s shoulder. I glanced around at my friends. Mason’s arm was wrapped firmly around Bee’s shoulders. Daphne was sitting on Rob’s lap. They looked so comfortable together. And everyone else was smiling like they just had a blast, despite all the awkwardness. Tonight had officially been a success. Especially if James could patch things up with his dad.
“What time do you think the lingerie pillow fight will start?” Rob asked. “I need to know when to casually stop by to check on you ladies tonight.”
“Ew, Rob,” Jen said and tossed a pillow at him. She stuck her tongue out at him and turned to face me. “So, what were you talking to my dad about?”
“I was just getting to know him.” It wasn’t my place to tell Jen or Rob about their dad filing for divorce. I wondered if they’d be happy or sad. Based on how they all acted around their parents, they’d probably be relieved. “He was wondering when he could expect grandchildren.”
Jen laughed. “Having kids is the last thing on my mind right now. I’m not even dating anyone.” She glanced at Rob.