“Penny.” He walked into the center of the room and turned me toward him. “Just tell me what’s wrong. I mean, I gathered from your speech that I’m a lying cheat who’s ugly on the inside. I’d like to know why you think that. Because I thought that we were in a good place. Unless you were talking about someone else.” His face looked grave. He was thinking about Tyler. I gulped.
“On Saturday you asked me if I had looked you up online and you were really mad. So I was thinking maybe there was more to find out about you.”
“So, you googled me?” His look was impassive. He wasn’t giving anything away today.
“I just wanted to make sure you were telling the truth.”
“I would never lie to you, Penny.” He grabbed both sides of my face again. He always seemed so sincere, but he never truly was. I looked at his mouth. I wanted to kiss him, but I needed to be strong. I shook away from his grip.
“I found an interview with Isabella that makes it seem like you were lying. And it was only from a few weeks ago.”
“You can’t believe everything you read in tabloids.”
“This one seemed pretty convincing.”
“So what did it say exactly?”
“That you two have never been happier. And that the rumors of your split were completely fabricated.”
Professor Hunter sighed. “I told you that it hasn’t been a smooth process. She won’t sign the papers. She’s being incorrigible.”
Our beach trip flashed in my mind. He had taken a phone call and I had overheard him saying “just sign the damn papers.” He had been talking to her. How had I not seen all the signs?
“She said in the interview that you were waiting for her to decorate your apartment.”
He looked down at me. “She’s lying.”
“Then how did she know your apartment hadn’t been decorated?”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “Because she’s been there before.”
“What? Why?” I was jealous. Of his wife. What is wrong with me?
“She came a few months after I moved here to talk about our relationship. Or lack of one I guess.”
“I don’t know if I can trust you.”
“And I don’t know if I can trust you.”
“Why? I haven’t done anything wrong.” But that wasn’t true. If anyone had been paying attention to my speech, I had basically told our whole class that Professor Hunter was an asshole. I hadn’t told him that I was only 19. And I had almost started a relationship with Tyler, despite promising Professor Hunter that I wouldn’t see him.
“I saw Tyler Stevens coming out of your building when I pulled up.”
“He just came to drop off my stuff that I left in class.”
Professor Hunter raised his left eyebrow. He knew I was lying. He could read me as well as Melissa could.
“After I found your wedding ring, I told myself we were over. I was in so much pain. I had never felt so broken before.” My tears started to well just thinking about the ache in my chest. “So I started to think about my relationship with Tyler. I thought maybe it could be more than a friendship. He’s always wanted it to be more. It just seemed like the right time.”
Professor Hunter took a deep breath and leaned against my bed. He looked distraught. “You’re dating him?”
“No. I thought I wanted to. But I was still confused about you. I’ve been a mess if you can’t tell. I still don’t know how I feel. Things seemed easy with Tyler. You just have so much baggage. I think I was just trying to get over you.”
“By getting under someone else?” He was gripping my comforter in his fists.
He had been cheated on by his wife. And now me. I was a cheater. He wasn’t the bad guy, I was. “It didn’t go that far, Professor Hunter. And it never will. Tyler found out about you and he wants nothing to do with me.”
Professor Hunter’s body tensed. “What do you mean?”
I looked into his eyes. He was going to think I was so stupid. “Tyler looked at my phone. He saw that I had missed calls from you.”
“You had me in your phone as Professor Hunter?” He looked incredulous.
“I’m sorry.” I wanted to cry again. “I don’t think he’ll tell anyone.”
Professor Hunter pulled me into his chest. I could hear his heart beating, slow and steady. Now he knew about Tyler. It was time for him to leave my dorm thinking I was an awful person too.
“Can I walk you out?” I asked.
He pushed my shoulders back slightly and looked down at me. “You want me to leave?” There was so much pain on his face.
“No.”
“Then I don’t want to go.”
“But I broke your trust. I had told you Tyler and I were just friends.”
“And you were just friends when you told me that. I broke your trust by not telling you about my marriage. Even though I never said I wasn’t married.”
“So neither of us lied, but we both hurt each other.”
Professor Hunter nodded his head.
“Then I guess we’re even?”
A sly smile crept across Professor Hunter’s face. “Penny, you’re hard to control. And I’m used to being in control.”
I gulped. I knew he was. The way he touched me, the way he could make my body react to him; he was always in complete control. His hands were still on my shoulders. I didn’t understand why he was still here, but I was glad that he was. Even though I had been angry with him, I still loved him.
“So what do we do now?” I asked. It felt like we were in a stalemate. We had both hurt each other and neither one of us knew if we could trust the other.