“I ain’t afraid of her!” he counters, then loud-whispers back to me, “but seriously, don’t tell her.”
“Commercial!” Marius announces.
“BOTTOM’S UP!” Sebastian and Jez shout and down their drinks and motion for me to do the same.
I sigh and take a drink from the beer Jez handed me. “How long does this show go for anyway?”
“I dunno, it’s a marathon”
“Hell.”
***
Did I ever tell you that you smell of blueberry muffins?
No. And I’m glad you didn’t. Why were you sniffing me?
I dunno, you always smelled nice. What did I smell like?
Orange Tic Tacs.
Oh, I love those.
I know 🙂
I know you know. You know everything.
Do I?
Sure. You know I miss you so much.
You’re drunk. Go to sleep.
You know I want you so much.
You’re going to regret these texts in the morning.
You know, if you were here, I’d be kissing you so hard.
I didn’t know that, but I guess I know it know. What about you? What do you know?
I know you want me to kiss you.
Do I?
Yes. And you want me to. I could taste it when we last kissed.
What else could you taste? On my finger?
Your pussy.
How could you taste that?
I remember how it tasted.
After all this time?
Yes, I crave it. Look for it. No one tastes like you. Only you taste like you, and I crave it. Do you know something else?
What?
I’m stroking my cock thinking of you right now.
Do you want to know something?
What?
If you tasted my finger now, you would taste my pussy.
Fuck. I’m going to come just thinking of that.
Then think of it.
I’m coming, Butter. I’m coming for you.
Good. Now it’s my turn.
***
“Up and at ’em, gentlemen! It’s coffee time!” a loud voice announces, accompanying the knock on the side of the bus that seems to go on forever.
“Kill ’em. Whoever that is, kill ’em,” I moan into my pillow.
“Can’t. They have coffee,” I hear Marius whimper in the room next to me.
“Fuck it all to damn hell. Fine, spare ’em, but only if they bring coffee tomorrow too, “Jez mutters from the hallway as he drags himself out to greet the coffee.
“Not a damn chance, dickhead,” Sebastian replies.
I force myself to sit up, my phone falling from my chest. For some reason, my pants are half way down my legs and-
Oh fuck.
I check the screen of my phone. Seven messages, all from Emily.
I can’t believe I’m doing this.
I want you too.
Do you want to know what I’m doing?
Brad?
Brad are you still there?
You came and passed out, didn’t you?
You suck!
Oh no, no no no no no!
I scroll through the messages from last night. I can’t believe what I’m reading, and that it went so far. If I wasn’t so hungover, I’d probably have to jack off again. As it is, I’m horrified. it is not what I wanted to happen with her. But oh God, the tequila. It gets me every time.
There’s only one way to deal with this.
Grovel.
I don’t wait for coffee before I send her a message.
I’m so sorry, I don’t know what happened. I must’ve fallen asleep. Forgive me?
No. Comes the answer.
Let me make it up to you?
You’re obviously still drunk.
Butter?
Let’s just pretend it didn’t happen. It’s probably good it didn’t.
I miss you.
Get used to it.
What? You are still coming aren’t you?
Yes. It was a figure of speech.
I’m glad you’re still coming.
Don’t get used to that.
You coming?
Anyone coming.
Yes ma’am. I’m sorry again.
It’s okay. It was fun while it lasted. Gtg. See you this afternoon.
***
I’m nervous. I’m actually nervous.
I’ve played to millions of people on TV at the Grammys, I’ve played to hundreds of thousands of people at Glastonbury, but standing here at the airport with this stupid rose in my hand, waiting for Emily to get off the plane, I’m actually fucking nervous.
It’s bad enough that I was having spontaneous heart palpitations and erections just thinking of her, but after my stellar performance last night, I’m not really sure what she thinks of me right now.
I’m actually glad for the buffer that Ben is going to be, and to be honest, I’m really looking forward to seeing the little tyke as well. He’s like a tiny male version of Emily. He’ll say something and it’s like I’ve heard it before. Or he’ll run his hand through his hair and then look at it, as if surprised at how silky it is, just like I’ve seen her do a thousand times before. I’m fast falling for the little kid, and it’s scaring me almost as much as it is falling for her.
“Brad!”
“Benny Boy!”
He runs up to me as if we’ve known each other for years and jumps up into my arms. I hug him tight, taking care to not jostle his arm. And he giggles, for what seems like no reason at all.
“How are you doing, buddy? I’ve missed you guys!”
“You have? Mommy’s missed you too. She said it like ten times.”
“Oh she did, did she?” I allow myself to look at her for the first time.
“Never mind that. Go get your bag.” Butter ushers her son along.
“So, you missed me, did you?” My grin feels like it’s splitting my face in half.
“I thought you ‘knew’ that already.” She glares at me.
I lean down close to her, my cheek brushing hers and I think I hear a soft gasp from her lips. “I’m just glad you did, because I missed you so much, it hurt to breathe,” I whisper low into her ear.
“Seemed like you were breathing just fine last night.” She pulls away and rolls her eyes at me before shaking her head and letting out a tiny chuckle. It’s little, but it’s something. Something to say, “the door’s not closed on us yet.”
“I got my bag, Mommy.”
I take his backpack from him. “Okay, let’s get this show on the road! How ’bout you tell me all about your helicopter ride, hey?” I pick him up and carry him through the crowd to the waiting car while listening to his excited babbling.