Bambi POV.
“Colin, you’re staying with her?” I asked my friend, he’s leaving me, he’s going to stay with his alpha, I know I got the job for him, but when Eliot told me that an alpha wants someone to work with her, I didn’t imagine her wanting for him to work with her as her baby, it’s not the weirdest lifestyle, I’ve been paid a couple of times to be someone’s little.
I had to pretend to be enjoying everything, I wasn’t pushed to be very young, to regress very much, but I couldn’t lie, I kind of enjoyed it, but I couldn’t be myself, instead, I had to do what I’m paid and asked to do, obey the rule, I got punished a couple of times, getting spanked hard on the bum, it was all a game for the supernatural, while it really hurt me, I wasn’t someone to enjoy funishement, they were punishement for me.
But now my friend would be living that life, maybe it’s my effect on him, maybe I’m rubbing off on him, but as long as he’s safe and enjoying what he’s doing, that’s fine with me, I only want, and need him to be safe, always safe and happy.
“Yeah, I won’t be back for a while,” Colin tells me over the phone after we got mugged, and he almost died, maybe he didn’t almost die, but he was hurt badly and if it wasn’t for the alpha, then he wouldn’t be in the hospital now. Like I’ve learned very long ago, nobody gives two damns about humans and what happens to us, we could die and they’d only bother to bury us after our bodies start to decay.
“Okay, take care,” I say ending the call with him, now I’m all alone in this house, in this world, I’m all alone.
I lay on my bed looking at the ceiling, what am I supposed to do, Colin found something to do with his life and I’m lonely, all I could do is keep on working to keep on providing for my mother, to get her medications and to keep on living. I decided to do something, to get out of bed, I had nowhere to go, I had nothing to do, or anyone to hang out with, instead, I decided to scrub our house clean, there wasn’t much in this place, it’s all ruined down, and old, but I could make it clean, or at least I could try.
Soon I ended the cleaning, took a cold shower and was in my bed again, with nothing to do, I wish Colin was here, he’s only been gone a couple of days, and I miss him, miss him so much, miss laying in bed with him and talking, and having fun, being held by my friend, the only one that cared about me, but instead I had to sit all alone, it’s my life now, get used to it Bambi, I told myself.
Colin didn’t come home until the end of the month, he only got two days off, two days he can spend with me, and that’s it, but even while he’s here with me, he feels like he’s not, his head is somewhere else, but he’s happy, I was happy that he’s happy with his new life.
“I need to do something, I can’t work,” I tell my friend, my face had a bruise from my last visit to the black market, it’s not safe to go there anymore, but I had to go.
“I want to drink,” I say deciding to get drunk, I can never get drunk with my clients, I have to stay in control, but now I can let go, I’m with my friend, and not anyone else. We made it to the club, I usually take wine, or just a beer, or whatever my date would order for me, but I knew what would actually get me the buzz I need, I need vodka, lot’s of vodka, I’ve been drinking since day one in the job.
“Another shot!” I call the bartender, vodka is my best friend now, better than Colin who got his own mommy, or my mother who’s more dead than alive, I was alone, more tears started to fall down my face, I’m crying over myself, over my life that’s passing and I’m still stuck in my place, and scared.
“You should stop,” a random guy says in a firm dominant voice, he sounds like my clients, only he sounds real, he might scare me into submission for real, and not pretending, but I wasn’t working and he’s not paying, I ignored him, and kept on drinking.
“Your friend got in trouble with his owner, better stop before yours get here,” the same guy says, he’s right, Colin left with his mommy, I don’t know where she took him, but the drinks were still coming.
“I own myself,” I spit in his face, I didn’t care about him, nor anyone else.
“Little girl,” he growls at me, and then picks me off the chair, he picked me up like I weigh nothing, and I’m too small, most client likes to carry or hold me, others love to throw me around, but I always knew what’s coming, but not here. Not with him, I didn’t expect to be thrown over his shoulder and carried outside, to the car, where my friend and his mommy were waiting for me.
I was placed in the car and my eyes closed on their own, I fell asleep, I don’t get drunk, not ever, and this is weird, the buzz died and all I wanna do is sleep now, I don’t know what happened, nothing, until the morning came and I found Colin next to me.
“Did you put a pull-up on me?” I ask him feeling something tight and warm around my waist, I lifted my oversized hoodie, the only way to wear a hoodie and saw it.
“Nu, but Christopher helped you to bed, he must have done it,” he answers me, who the hell is this guy?
“Who’s Christopher? and why?” I ask him needing to know the answer.
“If you gotta ask those questions, that means you were too drunk,” he says making me groan, I think I might have used the stupid garment, it’s too warm around and I don’t remember anything from last night, not even the need to use the bathroom,
“God my head hurt,” I groan, needing coffee, coffee would save this damn day and end this stupid headache I got, but at least I got Colin next to me this morning.