Skullcrusher is a girl.
And she’s not just any girl. As soon as she opens the door, there are three things I can immediately distinguish.
1. Her apartment is decorated in pink stuffed animals.
2. Her kitchen is on fire.
3. She is wearing Hello Kitty headphones.
Heaven ! she shrieks. It’s been so long ! I missed you !
How, exactly, do I casually mention that her kitchen is on fire ?
Veah smilesa real, genuine smile, as if she is truly glad to see this pink-loving, Hello-Kitty-Wearing creature. I missed you, too.
Um, I begin.
You know, you promised me you would be back soon, Skullcrusher says. Two years isn’t soon. Where have you been ? I heard about
Uh, I stammer.
My bounty ? Veah laughs. I know, ever since I left the Cais
The thing is, I start.
they’ve set out a contract for you, Skullcrusher finishes. I know, I’ve been tracking them down and setting up
false locations ? I could tell. Veah is grinning widely now, the same way she does when she is jumping out of crashing airplanes and being chased by murderous truck drivers. My stomach pinches. Thanks for that, by the way. You’ve been leading the Cais on a wild goose chase, but what I really want to know
Behind you, I try.
is how they found you in Florida ? Skullcrusher claps her hands together. I tried to cover up your location. I even set up a false ping in Moscow, Russia. But somehow, they didn’t buy it. There has to be a
rat ? Veah finishes. I figured, but
it can’t be possible, right ? Because Okami would sever the head of anyone who even so much as thinks in the wrong way, so
Okay, I’ve had enough.
Your kitchen is on fire ! I shout.
Both of them turn to look at me.
Veah peers behind Skullcrusher for the first time, and her eyes widen at the sight of the fire in the corner of the kitchen.
Skullcrusher glances back. My plant ! she cries, running into the kitchen.
No, don’t, I say automatically, as she fills a glass with water.
She tosses the water onto the fire.
For a moment, the fire flickerswavering.
You probably don’t know the origin of the fire, I explain. If it had been electric or caused by oil, putting fire on it would have only spread the fire because the particles could have combined. That was dangerous. You really should have just called the
Just as Skullcrusher sighs with relief, the fire explodes.
I told you, I mutter.
Is now really the time ? Veah says, spraying at it with a fire extinguisher.
Dense white smoke spirals through the air, and I cover my mouth, coughing at the scent of gas and flame and burning rubber.
It’s always the time to be right, I say.
Once the fumes disappear, all that’s left in the kitchen is the withered trunk of a tree and ashes on the counter.
My plant, Skullcrusher says, dropping to her knees.
It’ll be okay, Veah says.
I lean over to Veah slightly. And whisper, Is she really hugging the remains of her burned plant right now ?
My cherry blossom, Skullcrusher sobs.
It’ll be alright, Veah promises.
I whisper, Does she have pet nicknames for her plant ?
Veah glares at me.
Am I being insensitive ?
No, definitely not, I think. It’s not my fault that for some mysterious, inexplicable reason, I hate Skullcrusher and I can’t manage any sympathy for her or her stupid dead plant.
No, that’s the plant itself, Veah says. It was a cherry blossom. Don’t be rude.
Skullcrusher wails, My Baby-Bugga-Boo. My Ickle-Fuzzy-Wuzzy-Flowerkins. My Snuffly Cutie Poo Poo.
There is no way she’s serious.
Did the plant itself also happen to be a Baby-Bugga-Boo ? I whisper in Veah’s ear.
She scowls at me. A little empathy would be nice, Kaya.
What kind of idiot sets their kitchen on fire and doesn’t notice ?
Skullcrusher is still sobbing, her arms wrapped tightly around the shriveled remains of the tree. I heard that, she moans.
Look, you made her upset, Veah hisses.