answersy glances at him.
“It’s not only Damian who not be honest with himself. I can see… you are not honest to yourself, too,” he continued.
His words make Melody furrow her eyebrows. She curved at him with confusion. She is not honest with herself? When?
“Before you ask, let me explain. Do you want this divorce to happen?” he arches his eyebrows.
“It’s not-”
“Do you want to speak? Only two answers, yes or no,” Riccardo says firmly. He can see she is getting complicated with her answers.
Melody takes him aback by his strictness. She close her mouth not knowing what to say. She wants to say yes, yet… her heart says no. It’s just like it screaming to her to say no and no. There’s a silence between them.
“Is your silent… is a no?” he asks you again.
“I… don’t know…”
“See? That’s what I said about you not being honest with yourself also,” Riccardo added. A gentle smile curved on his face, “Think about it.”
“It… not a yes… at the same not a no…” she sighs, leaning on the swing, “I just… frustrated with what he said,”
Riccardo stares at her for a moment before speaking, “Do you love him?”
His question makes Melody flinch, and she looks at him with wide eyes. She didn’t expect him to ask her that. She is silent for a moment before a slight blush appeared on her cheeks.
“W-Why you ask that? Of course not!!”
“Are you sure?” he smirks, seeing she flustered by the question. “Your expression tells me the different things,”
“Stop it! I told you I’m not!!” she glares at him, cupping her cheeks.
He grins mischievously and leans toward her, poking her cheeks, “Then, why are you blushing?”
Damian went downstairs and straight to the dining room with a guard. They are discussing some work stuff. As they passed by the back door of the house, his eyes caught Riccardo and Melody sitting on the swing in the garden together.
He grins at her, poking her cheek like teasing her about something while Melody is blushing. The sight makes Damian twitch. A pang in his heart. His expression is stoic but his eyes tell something different.
“Sir? Are you okay?” a guard calls, noticing his sudden silence.
“I’m fine. Let’s discuss this in my study room,”
Damian didn’t say much and walked away. The guard looks at his boss with confusion but just shrugs it off and walks after him.
Melody smacks his hand, “Stop it, Riccardo!”
“I’m just saying. I mean… I just thought about it. If you aren’t attached to him, then why does the divorce news bother you so much?” he smirks.
“That’s…” She wants to say something to defend herself, but nothing comes out.
“The same goes for Damian. Why does this stuff affect him so much? Both of you are attached, yet… both of you are too ego and stubborn to admit it,” he chuckles.
What he said is right. Melody can’t say anything to deny it. But, did she love him? She did feel attached but love? She shakes her head and taps her cheeks.
“Oh well, I got to go before Damian kicks my butt out again,” Riccardo gets up, stretching his arms.
“Think about what I said, sweetie,” he ruffles her hair, causing her to glare at him. He chuckles and leaves the place.
Melody was left alone on the swing. She let out a deep sigh and stared at her lap, fiddling with her fingers. Love? Does she love Damian? Did she? She grunts and leans her head on the swing.
All of this is like a mixed signal to her.
____
She just finished her shower. She dries her hair before brushing her hair. Melody let out a heavy sigh and walked out of the bathroom. That’s when she saw Damian already on the bed, reading the same book she had seen before.
Melody didn’t say anything and just got on the bed. She lay down and face away from him. She tries to sleep, but the light is still on.
“Can you turn off the light?” she sighs.
“I’m reading,” he coldly said.
“I’m trying to sleep here,” Melody looks at him with a sharp gaze.
“No one is stopping you,” he replied nonchalantly.
Melody grumbles and grabs the pillow before closing her face with it. She knows this man is as stubborn as hers.
Damian glances at her before looking at his book. After a moment, he let out a deep sigh. He closed his book and put it aside. He turned off the light and lay down.
“Thank goodness…” she mumbles and pulls the pillow from her face and lays on it.
“You are so dramatic,” he grumbles and closes his eyes.
She wants to say something, but she knows it will lead to an argument. So, she was willing to shut her mouth and go to sleep.
Time goes by. The rain starts pouring, and it goes harder and harder every minute. Now, it’s already 2 in the morning. The thunder roaring makes Melody abruptly awake. She sat up, her chest rising and falling.
She looks outside the window; the thunder flashes through the curtain. This is the second time she couldn’t sleep during this bad weather.
“This is bad…” she rubbed her face.
“What is it this time…” Damian grumbles, accidentally woke by her shifting on the bed.
Melody frowns, “Why did you wake up?”
“Because you keep moving on the bed,” he ruffles his hair, “Can you stay still and get a damn sleep,”
“I can’t…” she mumbles.
“And why’s that?” he sighs in annoyance.
She sighs, “It’s thunderstorms…”
Damian frowns. His half-lidded eyes were fully open now. He looked outside the window, and it was true. He forgot that she was still afraid of thunderstorms.
“Oh…” he pauses for a moment before speaking, “Come closer…”
“What?” she frowns.
“Are you deaf?” Damian rolls his eyes.
“No. Of course not,” Melody scoffs.
“So, come closer, idiot,” he scowls at her.
She hesitated at first. Why did this man suddenly ask to come closer? Melody sighed deeply and did what he asked for. She scoots closer to him. Damian wastes his time; he grabs her waist.
Her face leans on his chest. His arms wrapped around her as if he protecting her from anything. More like… comforting? They stay in that position for a moment. She just listened to his heartbeat.
It makes her calm a bit. His heartbeat makes everything disappear. Melody snuggles closer without being aware of her actions. Damian didn’t say anything, but his grip tightened.
The silence fills the air. It’s not awkward, but… it’s more like… peaceful.
Then, Damian broke the silence, “Why did you didn’t sign the divorce paper?”
Melody mentally groans. She didn’t expect him to ask this question at times like this. It’s not like she doesn’t want to talk about it, but… she is just not ready.
“I… just need time,” she mumbles.
“Isn’t this what you want? I thought you wanted to divorce me right away,” he scoffs.
“Excuse me, sir. It’s not me who asked for this!” she looks up at him with an offensive expression.
Damian rolls his eyes, “You are the one who wanted it. I just did what you want.”
“I should be the one who says that. You don’t need me, didn’t you? So, I did you a favour,” Melody talks back, not wanting to back off.
“I didn’t mean that. I just-”
“Just what? It’s not like I don’t hear the determination in your voice,” she rolls her eyes.
“I told you, I didn’t mean it. Matthew, just get on my nerve, and his words are challenging me,” he grits out.
“Oh, so if he challenges you, you will do it to prove what you said is true?” she frowns and looks up at him.
He groans, “For fuck sake! Can you stop thinking it that way!?”
“How can I not think that way, Damian!? You say it, and you mean it!” she raised her voice.
“How many damn times do I have to say it!? I didn’t mean it! Can’t you see I’m trying here!?” Damian harshly says, his tone laced with frustration.
He is tired. Tired of trying to express himself, yet he can’t. Melody pulls away from him, looking at him with anger.
“Can’t you be honest to yourself for once!? Riccardo was right! You never be honest with yourself! Not even a bit! You always tell yourself right!”
Her words trigger him. Damian clenches his jaw and grabs her shoulder. The grip is tight but not tight enough to hurt her. Melody flinched slightly at his sudden grip.
“I’m trying… I’m fucking trying here!! For damn sake!! Why people can’t see I’m trying here!? I try to confront you but you never let me try for once!”
“I’m frustrated here! I… I don’t what else to do to express what I feel and what I want. I thought if I’m being complicated it can give you a hint or something…” Damian burst out.
“I just… not good at this…”
He pulls away, pushing his hair backwards, and rubbing his face with his palms hands. Melody let out a heavy sigh. Like she expected, if they talk about this, it will lead to an argument.
The atmosphere fell silent for a moment. Both of them try to calm themselves before start talking. Melody fiddles with her finger, somehow feeling guilty for making him like this.
Riccardo was right.
No one taught him to express what he wanted or what he felt. He is struggling and not knowing what to do.
“Dam…” Melody softly calls his name, “I… I know you are trying. I’m sorry. I just… I admit that… I’m not being honest to myself too.”
“I should have told you what I felt and let you explain or so whatever,”
“I’m being complicated here so… it fair,” he sighs deeply.
“No… you are not. You just… didn’t know how to do it. I should have been patient with you instead of… being as complicated as you,” she says, her tone filled with guilt and genuine.
All of this fighting makes her miss the old them. Where she feels carefree and comfortable around him even though he has been harsh toward her. She wouldn’t take it to heart but this time…
It stung like hell.
Damian sighs deeply and lifts his head. “Can we just relax and… talk about this… later?”
“Sure…” she crawls back toward him and back to the position she had earlier.
His embrace tightens around her. As if, he is trying to tell her something. She comfortably touches his hand, playing with his fingers. The rain fills the room with a peaceful atmosphere.
No tension this time.
Just relax.
“I don’t know what happened to me…” he mumbles.
“What do you mean by that?” she intertwines her fingers with his.
“I… I never felt this way before. This whole frustration-in a good way, not a bad way starts when this marriage happened,” Damian explains.
“New feeling?” she frowns.
He slightly nods, “Yes, new feeling. A feeling of afraid of losing you and… crave for your touch?”
He sounds like he is not sure what he is talking about. The way he blurts it out without any second thought makes Melody flustered. Crave for her touch?
That’s new.
Damian is just like an innocent little boy.
Even he’s not.
She knows that if she says something to confront him, he will become defensive since he is still learning. So, Melody decides not to reply to anything. But she tightens the grip on his hand.