CAMILLA’S POV.
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I parked my hair up in a high ponytail, as I bent down to tie the lace of my converse.
I didn’t even know when I slept off on Lucas’s arm, remembering how it felt so warm and secured as he hugged me tightly.
I woke up early in the morning and realized that Camilla and Beatrice were right. Mum wouldn’t be happy to see me shut me from the world. I needed to be strong, just as she made me promise her to.
I sighed taking in my features in the mirror, I had lost weight a bit because I thought it was best to starve myself to death and meet my mum.
A tear slipped down my face and I exhaled out wondering when the tears would ever end.
I took a close look at myself and noticed the awkward dark circles beneath my eyes.
I had been having terrible nightmares that made it unbearable for me to sleep.
I was lucky for sleeping quite well yesterday, didn’t know if it was Lucas that cast a spell on me for me to sleep that much.
I zipped up the black hoodie I wore with a design of shining stones glued on it that form a heart shape.
I buckled my belt on the tight black jeans I wore underneath.
I need to brush my fears aside and stay strong.
I grabbed my bag and slung the straps over my shoulder as I made my way to the door and saw Lillian was about to knock.
“You did it, girl!” She grinned staring at me and I couldn’t help to roll my eyes at her.
“Good morning,” I said trying to brush past her and walk downstairs.
“Hey wait, you didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend,” she said while I turned around to face her with a questioning brow.
“He’s so cute and hot, the one with green eyes,” She said with a smirk playing on her lips.
“He’s not my boyfriend!” I said nonchalantly when I realized she was talking about Lucas and turned to go down the stairs.
“Wait!” She said stopping me and I turned around angrily at her.
Didn’t know what caused that…
Maybe because of the terrific emotions building up in me.
“What do you want to tell me, for Christ’s sake?” I burst furiously, while she looked taken back at my outburst.
“What’s wrong with you?” She asked frowning at me and I couldn’t help but look surprisingly at her.
“What’s wrong with me, huh?”I asked taking steps closer to her.
“You think mother’s death is just something I could easily forget and act like she wasn’t in my life at all?” I asked her loudly.
“Do you also think it was easy for me?” She replied hurtfully.
“I think so because you don’t look affected at all,” I spat in her face with a recriminate look.
She’s been acting as if nothing went wrong at all…
“Camilla, you need to calm down! One has to move on, mum wouldn’t happy if we let what happened to weigh us down!” She spoke with a calm look.
“You know what! I’m tired of having this conversation with you, I’m off to school!” I fumed pulling the straps of my bag closer to myself as I walked downstairs.
“This is not you Camilla, you’ve changed somehow,” She said loudly for me to hear.
“Maybe it’s for the best,” I snorted and closed the door behind me with a loud bang.
I kicked the stones furiously out of my way as I walked to school. I decided not to call Beatrice that I would be coming to school so she will not pick me, I will see her in school.
I checked the time on my phone and it was 10 minutes to 8 before classes would start.
I should have waked up a bit earlier so I could be early and there won’t be lots of teenagers in the hallway to notice me.
I covered my head with my hoodie cap and plugged an earpiece in my ear, this would prevent me from hearing whatever crazy things those weird teenagers in school would say about me.
I got to the school gates and buried my hands in the pocket of my hoodie as I lowered my head and walked towards the school building.
Students lurked around the school compound in groups or twos as they talked and laughed but none of them knew I was the one due to the way I dressed.
I didn’t even put on my glasses as I made my way to the school’s main building, I placed my hands on the school’s large wooden door and added more strength in my arms to push the door open.
It made a cracking sound and I could hear it even in the blaring music of Taylor Swift- Look what you made do, I was listening to.
I walked through the crowded teens as I lowered my gaze trying to avoid eye contact with anyone.
I was singing a happy song in my head as I got closer to my locker, just two more steps for me to reach my locker open it and disappear to class but I didn’t succeed as someone placed a hand on my shoulder and twirled me around.
“What the hell!” I snapped loudly getting angry as I removed the earpiece in my ears before I realized it was Beatrice and Leticia by her side as Beatrice looked shocked at first by my outburst but smiled quickly.
“Jeez! Calm down, it’s me!” She breathed out while my breath slowed down.
“You finally came to school!” Leticia said happily but I was just looking at them awkwardly.
“Camilla! It’s us,” Beatrice said waving her hands in my face, but I gazed around and found numerous eyes on me, which I didn’t want to happen in the first place.
I could see them whispering while some were giving me looks of sympathy.
I don’t need their fucking looks…
I don’t want them to stare at me that way…
I could hear thousands of voices in my head, echoing noise of strange voices.
‘They are talking about you! hahaha!!’ An unfamiliar voice said in my head.
‘What a poor girl, everyone is looking at you with pity!’ Another voice said.
My heartbeat fastly hearing those voices ringing in my head as I felt my body get sweaty.
What’s wrong with me?
‘What are you standing there for? So they can pity your sick ass, Run!’ Another voice taunted.
“Get away from me!” I shouted staggering back.
“It’s us! Camilla, what’s wrong?” Leticia said coming closer to me but when I looked at her face, I saw my mother’s face laughing at me.
“Camilla!” Beatrice said worriedly and by this time everyone standing beside me was having my mother’s face.
Am I going crazy?
I felt someone’s hands touch me and I jerked back frighteningly.
“Leave me alone!” I cried.
‘Run! Run!! Run!!! They’re here to hurt you like they always did,’ The voices rang in my head as I clutched my hands tightly on my head trying to shut the voices.
It was becoming too much, I couldn’t handle it… Then I took to my heels.
“Camilla! Camilla!!” I heard my name being called while I ran as fast as I could.
My eyes felt cloudy and my head dizzy as the haunting voices rang deeply in my head laughing.
I don’t know how far I’ve run when someone gripped my hand and pulled me to his body.
“Leave me alone!” I closed my eyes shut as I tried to wriggle free of the person’s body.
I felt my body being hugged tightly as the voices in my head reduce.
“They will hurt me!” I whimpered snuggling closer to the warmth I’m feeling.
“No one will hurt you, Camilla, I’m here!” A deep voice penetrated my head and I moved back to see who it was.
My eyes widened a bit to see Lucas looking worriedly at me.
I looked around and noticed I was running towards the library.
Tears trickled from my face as he moved closer to me and hugged me, I clenched tighter to him as I buried my face in his chest as his hands wrapped the back of my neck making me inhale more of his scent.
I felt the demons ringing in my head leave as I felt completely calm.
“Camilla! Camilla!!’ I heard my name being called as I pulled away from Lucas.
“Oh my God! Camilla, what happened to you?” Beatrice said as she tried to catch up her breath while Leticia ran behind her and bent resting her hands on her knees trying to catch her breath.
“Gosh! You run like flash!” Leticia coughed trying to calm her breath.
“Are you okay?” She asked raising her head to look at me.
“Camilla, what’s wrong?” Beatrice asked so worriedly as I found my tears dropping to the floor as I covered the space between hers and hugged her.
“I don’t know! It seems I’m starting to get crazy!” I cried hugging her tightly.
“Shhhh! You’re not crazy, Nothing is wrong with you” Beatrice said patting my back lightly while I buried my face in her neck.
‘But I’m hearing weird voices,’ I sobbed bitterly in my mind.