The grip on his hand snapped like a vise, and he knew she was having another contraction. He stroked her hair and talked to her in a low, soothing voice.
He remembered enough from the few classes he’d gone to with her to remind her to focus and breathe. He had a bad feeling that if they didn’t get her to a room soon she was going to have this kid in the elevator. How long did it take to ride up four floors for God’s sake? Finally the bell tinged and the doors dragged slowly open.
The orderly led them down the hall to Labor and Delivery. Next came the nurses, and a million questions he tried his best to answer. Everyone was calling him Dad too and he had to admit to himself that he liked that more than he ever thought he would. They barely had time to get her to a room, into a gown and prepped. In the whirlwind of activity, he stayed right beside her, talking her through it.
“I want drugs,” Anna told the nurse who was taking her blood pressure. Then she turned to Cedric and begged, “Tell them to give me drugs.”
Cedric looked at the doctor but she shook her head. “No time. She’s fully effaced and dilated and the baby is coming down.
Whenever you’re ready, Anna, start pushing.”
After a couple of false starts, Anna seemed to get the hang of it. Cedric helped her sit up and counted out the seconds while she pushed, finally feeling as if he were doing some good. Considering the force of her contractions, he expected the baby to shoot out like a bullet but it was slow going. He wiped the sweat from her forehead, fed her ice chips when she rested, watched in awe as she worked diligently to push the baby out. In his life he knew he’d never love a woman more than he did Anna. He felt it too. Every tortured, agonized, scream ripped through him.
“The baby is crowning,” the doctor said after forty minutes or so.
Cedric didn’t even stop to think about what he was doing. He just peered down to look and saw the top of the baby’s head, covered with what looked like a lot of dark hair. It was the most amazing thing he had ever seen. “Oh my God. Anna, I can see the baby.”
“One more big push,” the doctor told her.
“I can’t,” Anna gasped. “I’m too tired.”
“Look at me,” Cedric said, and she looked up at him, her eyes glassy. “You can do this. One more push and it will be all over.”
She took a deep breath and he could see her gathering all her strength, giving it everything she had. Eyes closed in concentration, she bore down one last time and the baby popped out, slippery and squirmy with a full head of dark hair.
Just like his.
“It’s a boy.” The doctor rolled him onto Anna’s stomach and suctioned out his mouth.
A boy. A son.
He and Anna had a son.
He was small and pink and already exercising his lungs. And more beautiful than anything he had ever laid his eyes on. Anna touched him. His tiny little arms and legs, his fingers and toes. “Look at him, Cedric. He’s perfect.” She said with tears in her eyes.
The baby stopped crying and turned his head toward the sound of Anna’s voice. He looked up at them both with bright, curious eyes. Intelligent eyes. Cedric fell instantly and completely in love with him. The second he came screaming into the world he was his. Totally and absolutely a part of him. He hadn’t cried in a long time, but he could feel actual tears burning in his eyes.
“I am so sorry,” he told Anna. “I don’t know what I was thinking when I pushed you away. How could I have not known how much I would love this…him?”
She reached up and wiped the tears from his cheeks.
“I love you, Anna.” He said.
“I love you, too, Cedric.”
____________
The nurse took the baby away long enough to weigh, measure and clean him up-which felt like an eternity to Anna-then she wrapped him in a blue receiving blanket and brought him back.
Gradually the room cleared until it was just Anna and Cedric and the baby.
Their baby.
Cedric sat on the bed beside her, gazing down at the little bundle in his arms. Anna had nursed him for a while, and Cedric had been holding him ever since.
“He looks just like you,” he said, playing with his tiny little fingers.
“Oh please. He looks more like you and you know it,” Anna told him, and Cedric couldn’t help but smile proudly. She was right, and he couldn’t argue with that.
“Your Aunt will be so disappointed she missed this.” Anna told him.
He shrugged. “So we’ll find a way to make it up to her,”
Diana arrived minutes later, and she was too excited about the baby to bother about being angry that she wasn’t there for the birth. Soon the baby was in her arms, and she was cooing and whispering to him while Anna and Cedric watched.
He turned to look at her, and Anna wasn’t sure of what she saw in his eyes. Just right after the baby was born they’d declared their love for each other, and now she didn’t even know if he’d just said it in the heat of the moment. She knew that she’d meant hers, but now….
“Thank you,” he said softly, and kissed her on the forehead. When she said nothing, he added, “For giving me everything I’ve ever wanted. For coming into my life. For making me feel. For having my child. For making me whole,”
She almost laughed then. Was he turning into a poet or something? But then she whispered back, “You’re welcome,”
“Have you thought of a name?”
Anna nodded. “Ben…. Short for Benedict,”
Staring at Cedric, she tried to gauge his reaction, gave a tremulous smile as he softly repeated it.
“Ben…I like it.”
_____________
Seven weeks later, Anna lay in the bathtub, completely relaxed. Everyone doted on her and the baby. Taking care of her. Making sure she and the baby got everything they needed. Diana was the best grandmother ever and all that Anna would have wanted in a grandma for her child. She was so proud of Ben and you could literally see how much she loved him whenever she held him.