ELEANOR
The moment Easton walked out of the kitchen with the unknown guy, I lost my footing, staggering backwards as I felt the sharp pain shoot through my chest, my hands clenching tight over it but doing nothing to soothe the pain. My mind was racing with conflicting emotions, and only then did I feel the tinge of a connection between us, the pain of the rejection slowly filling every crevice of my body, each wave leaving me in utter dread, and just when I was about to hit the ground, I felt Jasmine’s stronghold around me and her voice finally seeping into a part of my consciousness, her eyes filled with concern and worry.
If I had known the pain would be so much, I probably would’ve thought twice before rejecting him. The pain was doubled for me, seeing as he’d refused to accept my rejection, my words doing some sort of sick boomerang as they hit me back in full force.
I had thought that with Alpine being silent, I wouldn’t be able to feel any pain, but it was all a lie. The books… everything I had read was all lies. Nothing had prepared me for the excruciating pain I was feeling.
I have to learn the hard way… having a wolf or not. Once the rejection words are said, it must definitely come with pain and lots of pain.
A part of me begged to run after him, to take back my words and plead for the pain to stop, but for so many reasons, I couldn’t. I didn’t.
My wobbling legs finally gave way, and I crumbled to the floor, taking a distraught Jasmine with me. Uncontrollable tears fell from my eyes as I continued to fist at my chest, which felt like it was going to cave in. During the entire period of my stay here, I was sure I’d gotten used to pain and agony, but nothing could be compared to this.
It felt like my lungs were contracting, and something was blocking the passage of air as I continuously heaved for air. It felt like something was continuously piercing my heart, and whatever it was, I could feel it but could never pull it out to stop the pain.
‘You did the right thing, Eleanor,’ a voice in my head said, and I smiled through the pain. There was nothing right about this. A lot of doubts clouded my mind. Had I really done the right thing by rejecting and chasing away the only one who could have had a chance and a reason to save me and my pack members? But then again, what if he was a weakling like the rest of the Alphas that Zane had invaded their packs and killed every one of their people?
His death would have been an added victory for Zane as he would waste no time in raiding his packs and killing everyone in his pack except the ladies of course, so he could sell them off as slaves for profit. That sick bastard.
Did my actions just save him, or did I just waste my only chance of survival? These questions continued to make rounds in my head, as did the agonizing pain.
I know Easton might not have understood the circumstances of our meeting, but I just might have saved him. I saved his life and that of his pack members. Zane was evil and he had never needed a reason to invade a harmless, unsuspecting pack, but he also wouldn’t miss a chance to paint me as the villain and the reason for him to go ahead with another massacre and I wouldn’t be able to live with that. I wouldn’t want to risk the lives of everyone in his pack just for the sake of my own freedom or happiness.
As I stared into space, lost in my thoughts, I couldn’t shake off the feeling that I had made a mistake. My heart felt heavy, and I wondered if he would be okay and if he would, even if for a slither of a second, understand that there was too much at stake, I did what I had to.
“Eleanor… snap out of it. You are scaring me!” Jasmine’s loud yelling reached my ears, pulling me out of my haze, and it was then that I felt how she shook my whole body with unimaginable strength.
I managed a weak smile, grateful for her presence and the concern displayed as I looked up at her, her brows were high enough to hit her hairline as she continued to scan my face frantically, almost jumping out of her skin when I cried out again as another wave of pain washed over me.
“Eleanor, please! Talk to me! Are you okay? Did that man do something to you? Say something, you’re scaring me!” The panic was evident in her voice, and I managed to nod before shaking my head to provide answers to her questions.
“Yes? No? Is that a yes or a no? To what questions exactly? This isn’t helping!” She all but cries out, and I make a small ‘tch’ sound in amusement.
“Yes, I am okay, and no, that man did not do anything to me. I will be fine, let’s just….. get back to work,” I managed to mumble, taking deep breaths as I tried to pull away from her and get back on my feet.
“You don’t look okay to me, Eleanor…… And, do you mind telling me what just happened and who that guy was?” She asked.
“My mate …. whom I just rejected,” I answered, and her jaw visibly hit the ground.
“No, you didn’t! Eleanor, that was an Alpha! Weren’t you looking for someone to help you with everything you have plotted out?” She gasps out, scandalized.
“What if he is weak too and just gets himself killed? The women in his pack would end up like us whilst everyone else gets killed. I am not about to have that guilt hanging over my head! I did him a huge favor by rejecting him. He should be grateful to me for saving his life, and the least he could’ve done was return the favor by rejecting me so I didn’t have to go through this pain! He is just as heartless as Zane,” I immediately ranted, and she shook her head.
“But we would never know if he would be able to go against Zane without giving him a chance! You should’ve put him to test or something,” Jasmine suggested, and I shook my head.
“Human lives are not an item you can carry out practicals on. They have blood flowing in them, and I can not for my selfish reasons hurt him and his pack.”
“But-”
“No buts here, Jasmine… mere looking at him, you can tell he isn’t that strong and he definitely looks like one of those weak Alphas that would dine with Zane and try to get on his good side while praying he isn’t targeting their packs next. He is weak, Jasmine, and if his time is near, I’d rather he dies of natural causes than have been killed while helping me. I don’t want my name to be mentioned as a reason for his death. I wouldn’t be able to live with knowing someone died and endangered his whole pack whilst trying to help me. So please, let’s just put an end to this discussion.” I finished, and Jasmine nodded in resignation before pulling me back to my feet after a few seconds of silence.
She held on to me as I stood on wobbly feet. No matter how much pain I was in, I wouldn’t let it control me. This was just another hurdle I needed to get past, and I was determined to succeed.
“Are you sure you are okay? You can take a seat while I continue with the cleaning, and you can join me when you feel better, okay?” Jasmine asked, and I nodded, a grateful smile on my lips.
As I focused on Jasmine, I suddenly felt a sense of dread wash over me, the hairs at the back of my neck standing as I became aware of a presence that loomed in a dark corner of the kitchen.
Fear gripped me as I wondered who could be spying on us. Was it someone from Zane’s pack? I called out to Jasmine as the figure emerged from the darkness, and I gasped out in fear when the figure finally came into the light.
I’m doomed.