I am not sure I had ever laughed so hard in my life. She couldn’t possibly think it was different. But her body language was defensive and her eyes told me she did. I was momentarily taken aback. Could she not know? Was that even possible?
“Oh. My. God. You don’t know.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
I didn’t say anything for awhile, quickly doing the mental math. But I couldn’t find any pitfalls. After months of interviews and depositions and discovery motions, it was all part of the record. If she really didn’t know, he had to know she would find out. I wouldn’t be hurting the case telling her something that was soon to be public knowledge.
“You’re right. It wasn’t like that at all. I am just talking out of turn. It was all innocent. Right?”
“Yes.”
It was almost a whisper and I considered asking her to repeat it. But I didn’t.
“Sure, he was just reaching out to the families of his employees making sure that everyone was aware of the situation at the plant. Making sure everyone was preparing for the worst case scenario. Of course, he was paying special attention to the most venerable of the group, the mid-level management. We were the most at risk. And he felt his personal attention was necessary.”
She was listening with intent, but I had no idea what she was thinking.
“So he invited you to lunch to give you a heads up. Of course nothing had been decided yet. It was all just preliminary. And every so often he would give you a call, to give you the inside information on how the process of evaluating employees was coming along. Then a few more casual lunches. A few more phone calls.”
“And then he changed his tactics. He poured his heart out. The stress of holding so many lives in the balance of his decisions was just too much to bear. The things he had been offered to save peoples jobs were so shocking. Money. Sexual favors.”
It really must have been shocking for Melanie because her eyes were as wide as I had ever seen them. I walked over to my desk as I talked, searching for the right file. When I found it I continued my narration.
“And that is when you sealed our fates. That was the moment that he won and I lost. The moment when your trust in me as a man, as a father, as a husband, as a provider lost out to your greed. That is when you gave him your body and destroyed my entire world.”
I slid the papers across the table. She stared down at them for awhile as if they would burn her fingers if she touched them.
I had never actually seen the lists and I always assumed that their existence was a myth. But my publisher’s attorneys had combed through thousands of documents revealed during the discovery process. The one she was holding was not all that interesting, except that my name was at the top of the list of employees to keep. According to the dates, it would have been one of the first lists produced, maybe even the first.
The second was far more interesting. Sure, the names were the same. But the second list had John Davis’ almost incoherent notes. Check marks by several names. And my name and one other crossed off with a single red line, mine annotated with one word, ‘Melanie’. There was only one other name marked that way. The attorneys couldn’t believe he had kept it. Then again, he always was an idiot.
The third list was printed on his own letterhead and marked ‘FINAL’ and, not surprisingly, my name no longer appeared.
Her eyes darted back and forth in a mental query that I am sure provided an answer that she wouldn’t believe.
“And now you’re wondering, ‘How could he possibly know all that?’.”
She was staring back at me, with her mouth slightly open. Dumbfounded was not a good look for her.
“You’ll figure it out. You’re stupid, but not that stupid. You know what I mean?”
The urge for another drink was strong. So I rose from my chair and went into the kitchen. I dropped a few ice cubes in a glass, and pushed it into the refrigerator opening to fill it with filtered water. If I had learned anything, it was never to give into my urges. Decisions made after careful planning and analysis of the potential consequences were more pragmatic. That, and the fact that being drunk in the same room as Melanie seemed to be asking for trouble.
“I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.” – Steve Martin
“Since we’re just getting everything out in the open, I guess I am curious about something. Did you EVER love me?”
Melanie had been staring at the documents for about twenty minutes. After about five minutes I could see that her grip tightened and her hands were shaking. A few minutes later her completely stoic expression returned. She hadn’t said another word the entire time, so I had decided to break the silence. Apparently, she wasn’t interested in answering my question because she moved her head just enough to meet my gaze, and then quickly looked away.
I would have been paying closer attention to Melanie but I just couldn’t wrap my brain around why she was sitting in my loft. I definitely had questions and I wanted answers, but I couldn’t even go there because her sudden appearance just didn’t make any sense.
It hadn’t even been forty-eight hours since Mr. Moneypants’ lawyers had requested a settlement conference. My attorney and the attorney’s for my publisher had thrown a bit of impromptu celebration that night, seeing that move as all but admitting defeat. But in a world ruled by sharks, these guys were the killer whales. They didn’t shy away from a fight, they wanted one, went looking for one and did everything in their power to make sure they found one. Victory wasn’t enough. They enjoyed humiliating people.
I am certain that none of them had read my book. Everything I wrote spoke against everything they stood for. And, yet, it was nice to have them around. Having been on the other side of table, with only righteousness on my side, and getting summarily crushed, had not been a fun experience. So, yeah, I could have easily, and correctly, been labeled a hypocrite. But I hadn’t started down this path, so I happily went along for the ride.
I was lost in those thoughts when I took another long look at Melanie. She was as beautiful a woman as she had ever been. I smiled at the thought that I had been right all along. I had often told her that she would just get hotter with age. I honestly didn’t have any idea why she had gotten all dolled up for me. She looked like she was ready for a night on the town, or more accurately a night on the prowl, and that’s when it hit me.
“Holy shit! HE sent you here!”