“I hadn’t so much as spoken to a boy or man, other than my father, in more than a year. Then I met you. Your family came to welcome us to the neighborhood. I watched from the stairs for a long time. Staring at you. You were different. I couldn’t explain it. I still can’t. But I knew you were different.”
“I didn’t know you had seen me until you slipped past my parents and up the stairs. ‘Hi, I am David. I am so glad you’re here. We are the only kids on this whole block. We can be friends and walk to school together. You are going to like it here. We can have so much fun. What is your name?'”
“From that moment you have been my best friend. I had been scared and alone for more than a year and then there you were. My own guardian angel. I felt safe. I was surprised but my parents were stunned. Do you remember the looks on their faces when they saw us talking?”
“Not really, I was too busy talking to you.” I smiled.
“I know. I remember. I never lied to you, David. I have always loved you, and you have always known that. I couldn’t hide it from you. I just never told you I was in love with you. Honestly, it just never came up. You are and were my very best friend and the only man I ever really trusted. You helped me more than you will ever know. You were so kind and gentle and sweet. I never wanted to be apart from you. As we got older, and you grew in to such a handsome man, I knew I was in love with you. But I had too many unresolved issues.”
“Plus, you weren’t interested in other girls. So I never worried about it. I had you all to myself and other boys left me alone. None of them were going to ever try to compete with you. Honestly, I think they felt relieved. You were always with me, so other girls went looking elsewhere and that made the guys happy.”
“I never told you I was a lesbian. What I said was the truth, I wasn’t interested in dating guys. Well other guys anyway. I just never corrected your thinking. I can’t have children David. My uncle saw to that. I know you better than anyone and I knew you wanted a family, especially after your parents died. I couldn’t be the one to keep you from your dream. When you found Susan, I knew you were in love and I was so happy for you. I never would have done anything to come between you. Ever.”
“I told Susan before you got married that I was in love with you. I also told her that she never had to worry about me and I would help her hold on to you no matter what. But I also told her that if she ever hurt you, and you weren’t together anymore, that I would take my shot. I would have waited forever without a single regret.”
She paused.
“She told you about me, right?”
“Yes, just this afternoon.”
I was stunned. I admit it. Margaret Peterson was my best friend. Always had been, always would be. She loved me and I always knew it. I had always loved her and she knew that. I would have done anything for her, she the same for me. She was stunningly beautiful. She had waited in silence so that I could have a shot at my dream. I had my children now. She had fought my every attempt to end my marriage until I was absolutely sure it couldn’t be repaired. I was at peace with my divorce. She wanted me and I wanted her.
Our first kiss, as more than friends, was truly magical; a culmination of years of friendship and caring and love. It took my breath away. Shortly thereafter we adjourned to the bedroom for the first time. That evening will always be special to me. Because it was Maggie’s first time, it was as traumatic as it was loving. That is all I will say about it. Our couplings have grown in passion over the years, though. I will simply say that Maggie Stephens is the most beautiful woman in the world and I don’t think that anyone who has ever seen her would argue with me. Fortunately for me, I will be the only one that ever knows that every inch of her body is perfect and that she has the skills of a goddess in the bedroom. I’m sorry, but I won’t share that. Some things just have to remain private.
Susan has remained a part of our lives. She and Mags work together on the many charities that our foundation supports. She shares all of the holidays with us and the children. True to her word, she never tried to win me back and I have never treated her as anything other than the loving mother of my children.
Oh, don’t worry, I can hear your angry shouts from here. My revenge was lame, I should have done more. You know, I think in the world of fantasy, everything always works out for the hero. But in the real world violent people go to jail. Jason was unemployed and without a career. That was all the revenge I needed. If Susan hadn’t decided to cheat on me, I would have never had to worry about him. Mike, well he was always a loser, still is. You can’t make someone feel more like a loser, when they have never been a winner.
Susan, well, I love her. Always have, always will. That we cannot be together hurts me as much as it hurts her. Oh, having Maggie in my life certainly eased a lot of my troubles. But she had always been there for me and always would be. Nothing would have been gained from making Susan suffer any more than the simple loss of our marriage. That was enough. Pain is pain, and you can’t focus its effects on one person and not get caught up in it yourself. It is best to try to move on and find as much happiness as you can.
Anyway, Susan doesn’t seem to date, but we have never spoken about it. For the most part she is happy and content with her life. Every once in awhile, I know she misses me and our life together.
I know, because I can see it in her eyes.